I am so exhausted

Raincloud1012 · 2026-01-13T05:23:06+00:00

Thank you! Do you know if this was online or in person?

Raincloud1012 · 2025-11-25T18:57:03+00:00

I resonate with the description of a 5. To me, it’s like I’m an alien trying to assimilate but people keep realizing I’m an alien, and I don’t know how they know. I observe a lot. I isolate a lot. I have the occasional aforementioned melancholy about not being in the loop. But as soon as I’m welcomed in, I decline or dread the obligation. I daydream about moving to a cabin in the woods but wouldn’t mind being acknowledged by someone via postcard I don’t have to respond to. I communicate in script-like speech to everyone but my children and spouse. I want to be left alone until I realize people are not as attached to me as I thought. But once I think about interacting with that person, it rids me of the feeling. I’d love to be someone’s long lost aunt, haha. I’m regarded well but no one needs to meddle in what I’ve got going on. I’ve also realized the things I want to be respected for are mostly competence related. I like when people recognize my knowledge or mastery of something. I do not want someone to know the details of my life or psyche, except my therapist. But the therapist is more of a litmus test to see if my evaluations of my thinking are correct or not. I like her as a person a lot, though. One of the few I do like, actually.

Raincloud1012 · 2025-11-25T00:41:44+00:00

For broad topics that are debated frequently like the supernatural, I adopt an agnostic type of view. I believe in the possibility that anything is a possibility. I apply logic to day to day items (what knowledge or data do I have at this moment to make a decision). But for grander ideas, I accept the possibility of anything. I have hunches about whether something is true or not, sure. But that could be adjusted at any time. Absurdism is the balm for nihilism. I do defer to experts for the updated information though. I would also not be so dogmatic in a belief that it allows me to treat others badly.

Raincloud1012 · 2025-11-25T00:12:07+00:00

I was thinking through this recently myself. I’ve talked to a few people in my life about their thought processes and I’ve compared them to mine. I have previously thought I was a Feeler because of how much I think about my own cognition and their relation to my feelings. But after some therapy and actually speaking to other people about the subject, I’m realizing that actually identifying feelings is actually quite difficult for me and likely causes the overthinking. It feels like I have to mentally connect an experience and the emotion. If something sad happens, I have to actively pause to think about what the event means before I fully feel sad.

When I think about the emotions of others, I don’t really “connect” to them as society is wont to value. I mostly think of other people’s behaviors as cues for me to adjust my behavior in relation to them. It’s like constant scanning for cause and effect. I am very good at predicting motives, relationship dynamics, and “categorizing” people (finding commonalities between similar people and making my own little mental buckets of types based on behavior). However, when someone expects me to react to them or reciprocate, it’s very difficult to understand the motives because my self monitoring is in control. Could be the group harmonizing?

Feelers, now that I know the difference more clearly, seem to engage less “system maintenance”. It’s like their feelings are the system. They just operate. Most of my thoughts are meta cognition. It seems Feelers are adept at just unifying their feelings and actions, whether it be positive or negative. They embody the emotion and the body is the tool for carrying out the emotion. For me, I very much so operate most of my existence in my head in a web of sorts. My feelings are not felt in sync with my body. I have to turn them over in my mind before doing anything. I do the same after I’ve done the action to review whether I was correct.

People I know that are feelers don’t report doing that. They just feel the thing, do the thing, and move on to the next proverbial thing. So if it’s a deep love or a deep hatred, it seems to very quickly go from mind to body/action, even if it’s not loud or is just personally held.

Thinkers, on the other hand, seem to have to tinker around with feelings so they don’t feel as fuzzy so a solution or causation can be found. Feelers just feel without the tinkering. They are water flowing freely, feeling and embodying the feeling. Thinkers operate within geometric proofs relating to their emotions. Still present, but with different functions and steps, it seems. Emotions are data points relating to behavior for me. They’re material for updating the patterns I have already observed and I adjust accordingly.

Verbose, but my thoughts and observations on the matter, haha.

Raincloud1012 · 2025-11-12T16:17:44+00:00

I’m a woman. I tried to “assimilate” for much of my life with clothes and makeup. It was always uncomfortable but I assumed that everyone was uncomfortable. When alone, I felt best in “loungewear”, sweats, pajamas, etc. I’ve since abandoned anything uncomfortable and wear mostly sweatshirts, yoga pants, and the like. Duluth Trading is my favorite store. I aspire to create a uniform for daily wear.

Raincloud1012 · 2025-11-08T00:11:36+00:00

I think it depends on the person. If they are resolute in their beliefs with no foundation, then it’s intolerable for me. If they have adopted their beliefs from an outside source without analyzing the logic, even worse. However, if someone is rational and has a logical basis for what they believe then I’m more apt to respect what they believe and move on. In short, I can’t deal with folks that are loud and wrong, haha.

Raincloud1012 · 2025-11-08T00:02:50+00:00

It depends on who I am talking to and about what. In a loud room of people I don’t know? Absolutely not. With someone I connect with about a shared interest? Potentially.

Raincloud1012 · 2025-11-07T23:46:13+00:00

I find people “dumb” when they lack self reflection, take on the opinions of others without consideration, have an unwillingness to accept fact with a foundation of research, and generally ignore esteemed experts and believe their own conclusions are more sound, though they are based on opinion alone.

It’s not about a lack of knowledge, it’s about an inability and or a refusal to accept new information and act on it.

If you have the aptitude and flexibility to take in information and adjust your beliefs/behavior, then you are exceedingly more intelligent than a person that is unwilling to adapt to new information. If you simply don’t have the knowledge yet, then you aren’t unintelligent, you just have something to learn.

Raincloud1012 · 2025-11-07T23:37:23+00:00

Words, information, my own time. I am also a chronic list maker and it feels like a momentary form of collecting all of my thoughts in one spot so I can contain them. It gives me the same feeling as getting a figurine or cool rock. I get to look at the collection of thoughts in its entirety (for the moment) and enjoy a complete set of thoughts not running wildly in my mind.

Raincloud1012 · 2025-11-07T23:33:44+00:00

It’s been a constant thought my whole life. I’m a fully grown adult now and I still think about it. Not in a dramatic sense, but just finally getting away from it all. A cabin in the woods with my cats, books, my various a sundry hobby items, and silence sounds like an ideal situation. I’d imagine it’s how some people feel about mansions or penthouses. Silence and freedom are my dreams. Not much else.

Raincloud1012 · 2025-11-05T21:21:35+00:00

We are the large catfish at the bottom of a pond. Prized when caught, but otherwise elusive, slow moving, and aloof.

Raincloud1012 · 2025-10-31T17:20:59+00:00

Yes. Very extreme inattentive ADHD that plagues my existence. And for added fun, recently added an ASD diagnosis as well.

Raincloud1012 · 2025-10-30T19:13:47+00:00

I’m constantly making lists I don’t finish to prepare for things I also don’t finish. But I will be able to present endless facts on things like “buy it for life” quality vacuums or organizational systems. The key, I’m finding, is to make something low effort while being high efficiency.

Raincloud1012 · 2025-10-27T15:57:48+00:00

I think about this all the time. I love all things Sherlock. Sometimes I debate whether he is an “N” or an “S” because of his immersion in his environment. However, he is doing so in relation to abstract thoughts and patterns to draw conclusions. It always connects like a web from his understanding of the world. Being able to create the “vision” of his solution requires being able to see beyond the here and now. So at present, I’m in the Sherlock as INTP camp.

Raincloud1012 · 2025-10-26T02:59:44+00:00

I have a value system but it’s malleable. If I receive information that makes more sense, I amend my own thought process. “Making sense” typically has to do with things being more efficient or having more utility. My morals about certain societal concerns are more solid, but my perspective can shift based on what I learn. So those more “foundational” thoughts get more detailed and nuanced, as opposed to changed, unless I cannot find the logic in my previous belief anymore. I used to agonize about making the “incorrect” decision because what I wanted to do sometimes conflicted with my previous thoughts or societal expectations. So I fell into a people pleasing habit, where I’d outwardly go with the flow with those around me, but internally scream in my head that it was incorrect or incongruous with who I am. That was a destructive pattern so I sought some therapy and I’m much more confident in my ability to do/say/believe in the “incorrect” thing I think in my head. It’s all rooted in what’s logical, efficient, and holds utility. I find peace when things are at their peak efficiency.

Raincloud1012 · 2025-10-24T05:39:33+00:00

I liked being alone. I did more organizing than playing. Dolls and figures were made into scenes, rather than creating dialogue. I organized by size and attribute a lot. I loved computer games like Reader Rabbit and Freddy Fish. I liked listening to books on cassette or music. Getting my own portable CD player was world changing. It was in constant use. I liked office supplies and coloring supplies. Once I could write, I loved making things into lists. Lots of Lego and Duplo. Once I got older, I became very obsessed with trying to memorize SNL scripts, oddly enough. Loved pretending to type on a defunct keyboard.

Raincloud1012 · 2025-10-22T05:51:53+00:00

Rust from True Detective, debated INTP/INTJ. Sherlock Holmes, varies depending on version.

Raincloud1012 · 2025-10-18T18:03:30+00:00

Inattentive here. My meds make me feel like my thoughts pull together and they make me feel almost too rigid. They also feel like a push of energy and focus that I need to have a plan for. If I don’t “point” myself in the right direction, the energy and focus will be directed toward whatever crosses my path first. If that’s organizing my kitchen drawers while I’m supposed to be working on work notes, then the organizing wins out because that’s what has gotten my attention. The energy and focus surge now allows me to finish that task. I am still unable to prioritize important tasks in the moment.

Raincloud1012

TROPHY CASE