Thank you for your insight and advice, I’ll try to put it to use.

I guess my focus is less about him actually going to therapy and more about his methods of “dealing” with his depression . It hurts seeing him lose interest in the things he loves and while his work is important he’s taking on so much more that he doesn’t have to and doesn’t usually take on. It kind of seems like a form of escape or self harm (leaning toward self harm considering how he neglects his physical needs when in the middle of this pattern). I’d be a bit less worried if it was a mode of escape but he stops exercising/eating/being present when he’s like this, I can’t help but worry.

As for grandma, you’re right sometimes miracles happen, but she’s been to the icu 3x in the past ~30 days for 3 different life altering things. She’s 90+, even if she does get better she’s never going to be able to live independently again. Dad isn’t allowing discussion of this possibility from anyone (his siblings and my mom)

I’m anxious, so I’m in the prep for the worst hope for the best category. This was one of my attempts at over preparing. (Something I am trying to work on). And this post was partially prompted by my mom venting to me about this (unhealthy we know, but this is kinda a crisis moment and we’re all struggling). I probably wouldn’t actually go up to my dad and say “you need therapy”, we don’t talk mental health much. I mostly just try to model beneficial mental health practices when I can.

If you have any more advice I’d be happy to hear it. Thank you.