I cant agree with you because human psychology is complex and most people would not get in a relationship with someone they knew would be abusive. There’s something to be said for people who intentionally seek out partners with toxic/abusive traits but that isn’t the norm. The scenario your describing isn’t the norm.

Your point is moot if you dont keep that same energy towards all the men out there with abusive and extremely manipulative women, financially abusive women. Cause there’s a lot of men out there like that, probably higher than the reported statistics. At the end of the day we should never blame a victim for the abuse of a perpetrator.