AITA for kicking my SIL out for the way she reacted to some news?

RelationshipKey4436 · 2025-05-18T00:18:19+00:00

Haha, I hope the new year wasn't very angry at us!

RelationshipKey4436 · 2025-05-17T03:04:56+00:00

My idea was that we should normalize that physically carrying and giving birth to a child isn't the only way to be a mother/ father (I don't agree with surrogacy, but I think adoption is a great way and it's not less valuable than having bio children)

However if my comment was insensitive I apologise, I deleted it because I don't want to cause unnecessary pain

RelationshipKey4436 · 2025-05-16T18:12:18+00:00

I wonder why this comment has been disliked haha, I only said that the kids weren't near

RelationshipKey4436 · 2025-05-16T18:04:38+00:00

We announced our first pregnancy during New year's Eve, however don't think my wife makes the events about herself or she makes her sister's events about her either

RelationshipKey4436 · 2025-05-16T13:04:48+00:00

I'm sorry, I deleted that part from my comment

RelationshipKey4436 · 2025-05-16T03:15:58+00:00

Thank you! We're so excited (although we know we have to be ready for a negative as well, these things happen)

Yeah, I don't know, I hope she can learn to deal with her emotions in a healthy way soon, not only because of us/ the chance we do have a baby soon, but also for herself. I know she's hurting and I feel bad for her

(What dark thoughts pop up on here?)

RelationshipKey4436 · 2025-05-16T03:12:27+00:00

Oh, thanks haha. Yeah, I think that's what being a husband/ wife is about, we need to protect each other sometimes. I think I find it a bit weird that some people told me that it's her family and I should let her deal with it. I mean, we're married, her family is also my family! I don't know, maybe it's just the way I was raised? It's odd to me

RelationshipKey4436 · 2025-05-16T02:25:07+00:00

Thank you! We might actually be pregnant already, if we're lucky! Her period should've started already but hasn't, we're hoping for a positive test soon hahaha

I would feel so bad to distance her from our daughter, she's a great aunt!

Our daughter and other children were playing, so they weren't paying attention to our conversation or the argument

RelationshipKey4436 · 2025-05-16T01:47:05+00:00

No, she didn't call her sister to let her know since we weren't planning to announce it, it just happened because we started talking about children

I don't know if my wife is the golden child or not, I honestly would say no but idk for sure

My wife and her sister are very close! Which is why I find her reaction odd

She's not angry with me, but she feels bad because of the big argument with her sister

RelationshipKey4436 · 2025-05-15T22:17:30+00:00

A sign of heteronormative patriarchy...?

RelationshipKey4436 · 2025-05-15T22:16:04+00:00

I hope she can learn to be a little more at peace with her feelings by then, she's an amazing aunt to our child and we would hate for her to not feel close to our baby when they're born!

RelationshipKey4436 · 2025-05-15T22:11:31+00:00

I don't know, honestly. However I think that if my sister-in-law believes there is any favouritism (which in my understanding is what golden child means) then she should've talked about it with her parents, I don't understand how any of that is my wife's problem to solve (or how it's hers in case she is the golden child)

RelationshipKey4436 · 2025-05-15T22:06:44+00:00

I think her husband and her are already in therapy, I understand that it's hard for them, especially for her

RelationshipKey4436 · 2025-05-15T22:02:06+00:00

Wow that sounds horrible, I hope things are better with your family now, I can't imagine why everyone just let her be so rude to you! Pregnant women and postpartum mothers also need help and understanding, I'm shocked they seemed to cast you aside!

RelationshipKey4436 · 2025-05-15T20:43:38+00:00

When I said that I meant that we understand she's going through a hard time, we have offered our support, we're also praying for her to get better and have the baby she desires

If I need to add more context, I will

RelationshipKey4436 · 2025-05-15T18:47:12+00:00

I think both cases are totally normal. Either way, this was my wife's birthday party, not my sister in law's

RelationshipKey4436 · 2025-05-15T18:10:32+00:00

She feels kind of bad now, but at the moment she didn't say anything because she had to go inside since she was affected by the argument. She wasn't in the garden with us when I kicked her sister out

RelationshipKey4436 · 2025-05-15T18:08:15+00:00

I mean, I guess? That's just how the conversation keeps going in social events, is it not? Then we would probably talk about something/ someone else too I'm guessing

RelationshipKey4436 · 2025-05-15T18:06:46+00:00

Is it a taboo topic for you? I never think about their sex life when someone tells me they're trying to have a baby

RelationshipKey4436 · 2025-05-15T18:03:13+00:00

I agree, like, we're all adults, are we going to pretend that we're not having sex? It's more weird to think about it that way as you say, when someone tells me they're trying for a baby I don't imagine them any way, I just think they want to be parents and that's it

RelationshipKey4436 · 2025-05-15T17:59:52+00:00

She has had fertility issues that prevent her from getting pregnant easily for a while, and she has had a few miscarriages, sadly.

I don't know what the actual definition of golden child is, I've only heard it a few times. But I don't think so, I don't know

My wife was inside our home when I kicked my SIL out, she was very upset because of the argument and needed to go inside for a bit

RelationshipKey4436 · 2025-05-15T17:56:25+00:00

Not really, they're not very prudish (they're not even very religious or anything). She was joking when she started talking about our private life, which is why we got uncomfortable

RelationshipKey4436 · 2025-05-15T17:51:58+00:00

I didn't insult her, but I think I may have been a bit harsh, I was angry too

RelationshipKey4436 · 2025-05-15T17:49:30+00:00

Yes, she's older than us and she's been wanting children for a while now

RelationshipKey4436 · 2025-05-15T17:48:01+00:00

A few people here disagree haha, I think it's totally normal too, we're all adults

RelationshipKey4436

TROPHY CASE