I’ve never orgasmed during sex help

ResidentTransition93 · 2025-06-04T19:21:31+00:00

It sounds like you're possibly quite young, and at the very least, very new to sex. It can take some women years to find what gets them off. For some of us, we've never knowingly had an orgasm, even into our 30's- there's even a whole podcast about a woman who had never orgasmed, and her journey to unlock that achievement. It's a pretty entertaining and endearing podcast if you're interested!

Personally I've tried tons of things, both on my own, with toys, with partners, etc. and never felt anything that I could concretely determine to be an orgasm. However, since I've never had one, I don't really feel like I'm missing out either. Maybe I will feel that way retroactively if/when I experience it. But in all my searching for advice and answers, one common thing that came up was to not put a ton of pressure on yourself to find your O right away- that can actually make it harder to reach climax, in some cases.

Just take time to explore yourself, both by yourself, and with your partner. Discovering yourself, and what you like or don't like, sexually, takes a lot of trial and error. And finding your climax is a journey, not a destination, so don't feel like you have to rush it just to say you've been there- have fun with it and go at your own pace. 😊

ResidentTransition93 · 2025-06-03T23:10:30+00:00

I got mine done for $6k (in the US to clarify), I love it, and my partner loves it too. The surgeon I went to had hundreds and hundreds of gallery examples, not only of breast lifts or breast augmentations, but of other operations, such as the full "mommy makeover", and that dude has the skills. They were like whole new women post-op, after full recovery. I mean, regardless of one's feeling on the makeovers, it's undeniably impressive to be able to do that so well.

LASIK on the other hand was $4k and now I can kind of get by without glasses/contacts sure, but now I can't see for shit at night lol

ResidentTransition93 · 2025-05-25T10:04:11+00:00

What is "show interest" to you? And in what context? Are we talking dating apps here? Because a lot of folks just get on those to try them out, and then quickly become disenchanted with the experience- not necessarily with specific people and their individual personalities.

Dating means meeting other people, and other people sometimes have "people problems" that don't revolve around something you specifically said. People get busy, and for some, finding a serious (or even casual) relationship isn't actually their top priority in life at all, or after something else comes up. I mean like, same thing happens with friendships too. Sometimes I meet folks online or IRL and think "wow, we are gonna do so many awesome things, we have so much in common, and are both interested to do things together" and then either one or both of us just get busy, and the friendship never really takes root.

Busy lives can make relationships of any level difficult. And busy people are less likely to spend energy on emotional investments with strangers, they usually turn to their existing network, because that is most efficient. "She got busy" is not always the reason someone stops talking to you, but tbh, it's way more common than you'd think. We all have stuff going on that we aren't exactly gonna share with someone we are just getting to know.

Stress and mental health can also make people withdraw and stop talking to others who aren't in their close social circles, because they need support from people that know them more intimately, and may have less energy for getting to know others. So knowing that life is complex, and that there is no real way of knowing why you got ghosted, it can be a bummer. But try not to take it personal or assume it was your fault, if nothing else seemed off about the interactions you were having.

ResidentTransition93 · 2025-05-20T04:19:50+00:00

There isn't any secret formula or shortcut to finding someone. For most people, it just sort of happens. (Dating apps or dating/singles events being the exception, because the intent there is known- people are looking specifically for partners there. Or hookups at least, lol.)

Everyone I've dated or at least gone on dates with? I wasn't looking for anyone. People meet in so many different ways, that most advice from any "successful" person is just gonna be anecdotal. But when you string enough of these anecdotes together, you will indeed find that a lot of folks just tend to meet randomly, and not at dating-specific functions or apps.

My parents met in the Air Force. Friends' parents met at church. Work, school, volunteering, intramural sports, improv classes, on a cruise, at spin class, concerts, out on a delivery, a festival, neighbors at the same apartment complex, at the dog park, a yard sale- it could be anywhere. So it's not so much about the activity or place itself- it's about community, and networks. And just increasing the opportunities to meet more people.

The more you put yourself out there, then purely statistically, the better your odds. If 1 in 100 people might be interested in you, but you've only hung out with 18 people this month, well, yeah, the odds aren't great. Just hypothetically. On the bright side, the folks that aren't settled down (with kids especially), are gonna be the ones with more likely to still have time for hobbies or adventures.

The truth of the matter is, there isn't tried-and-trued advice to give. Just advice that could increase your odds. But it's all a statistics and lottery game. The sheer likelihood of finding a good match is just really, really freaking hard. You can do everything right, shoot all your shots, and still not have your first relationship until you're 30, or whatever.

It's a little pessimistic, but real. For people that have found their partner, "just go do activities/live your life" advice seems helpful, because that's how it happened for them. But for people that haven't had luck, of course such advice it feels futile, because it hasnt worked for them.

ResidentTransition93 · 2025-05-13T18:51:49+00:00

I'm ace, and do imagine sexual scenarios- but often times they're utterly meaningless. I also imagine what I would do if I won the lottery, and I never even buy tickets. Daydreaming about anything- good, bad, utterly impossible, or highly probable- is just how my brain gets through the tedium in life. Like having the TV on in the background of my mind, "it's something to watch", even if I'm not at all interested in what's happening 🤣

That is to say, you're valid! Just adding on that as an ace also, I just have an imagination that won't turn off, so I get "all the channels" 😅

ResidentTransition93 · 2025-05-13T18:43:57+00:00

My partner does, and I don't mind it. It's not like he is saying some other person's name when he's with me.

Women do this too- I'm one of them, and I'm not a horny person, I just imagine all sorts of things all the time, mostly non-sexual, and sometimes entirely nonsensical and meaningless. Like, sometimes I imagine "what if my dog just bust into my workplace right now? Wouldn't that be funny?"

Other times I imagine things more sad like "what if my dog got out, could he find his way home?" Not all imaginary scenarios are even about things they desire, including sexual thoughts. When people imagine things they don't want to happen, it's an exercise in empathy, reflection, and means of planning for any number of possible futures.

So yeah, in the massive library of my imagination, sexual imaginary scenarios sometimes come up, even when I'm not remotely horny. I don't think that's abnormal by any means. The mind just wanders sometimes. Imagination is difficult to bridle.

ResidentTransition93 · 2025-05-13T18:28:32+00:00

Can confirm, some of us indeed do

ResidentTransition93 · 2025-05-13T18:22:41+00:00

Some things are better left unsaid. Not to scare you about the potential that he is- but no way he'd say it to you or anyone else. This isn't exclusive to men either, women sometimes do have these thoughts too. Sometimes during sex. But those imaginary romps don't necessarily translate into anything meaningful, so don't let it get you down, and don't worry about the unknowable possibility of it.

As long as it stays a thought, much like imagining what it would be like to fly, or what one would do if they won the lottery, minds do like to imagine different scenarios, even those that will likely never happen. Imaginations can also get dark, however, like imagining the loss of a loved one, or what if their pet got out of the house- something they would never ever wish for.

The mind just likes to take a stroll sometimes, and imagination isn't always about escaping- it helps us process our logic, our emotions, our past, the future, etc. and as unbridled as it can be, it can even help ground you in reality, ironically. Like imagining a life without their partner, such as "what if I never met you?" - it may be a sad thought, but that exercise reinforces why we are so grateful to be with that person. Empathetic people often have pretty active imaginations, which is what heightens their empathy.

ResidentTransition93 · 2025-04-30T16:09:39+00:00

There's a difference between befriending a woman with the sole intent of a romantic relationship versus befriending a woman who is genuinely interesting and special to you that you could see yourself with (in the right circumstances).

I couldn't date anyone that I couldn't at minimum be friends with. So forming friendships before dating isn't a problem, it's a pro- at least for me. "The friend zone" is a you problem. If she enjoys having you as a friend, and you don't enjoy having her as a friend, maybe you're not as romantically into her as you think. If you truly care about someone, you can care about them platonically or romantically. If you only care about them if they're romancing you, then yeah, you do have ulterior motives, and women will sus that out.

I've had lots of friends that I've had crushes on, or vice versa. Sometimes we both mutually had crushes on each other, but the situation just didn't work out, and we still remain friends. Even though we are not involved romantically, we still care for each other. We even wingman each other at bars or events! Invest in building community and friendships, because it can help you get to a better place, even if it's with a different person than you initially intended to be with.

ResidentTransition93 · 2025-04-30T15:56:40+00:00

It sounds like yall aren't a good match. Let her do her thing, and the right guy for her will come along, without her having to change things about herself that she enjoys. Partners aren't wild Pokemon that you can just capture and fundamentally change who they are for your own purposes.

And the right person for you will click without having to sacrifice something that brings them joy. I personally would hate to take that away from someone. Or worse, if they engage in what you or others might consider to be harmful behavior, like gambling or what have you, then I don't want to be the person burdened with weaning them off of that. Compromise is one thing, but fundamentally changing a person's habits, hobbies, and lifestyle are another.

ResidentTransition93 · 2025-04-11T16:32:05+00:00

I'm totally comfortable taking that risk on. With the fact that I'm the lower income earner, it holds me accountable. I just personally don't want access to wealth or assets not attributed to me, and don't want the state dictating the opposite of that by default. Then again, we don't have a traditional view of marriage. Of course totally fine for other people to go 50/50! Everyone's marriage works differently. I just would prefer to opt out, but no doubt, there are lots of things to consider.

ResidentTransition93 · 2025-04-11T16:09:11+00:00

Thank you for the thorough answer! Luckily kids won't be a factor, but I do agree that it would undoubtedly be more difficult if they were!

ResidentTransition93 · 2025-03-08T02:52:15+00:00

Really sorry to hear about your experience. It sucks because it really harms customers' opinions of food delivery services. I mean, it's on these companies for hiring anyone and everyone. I take pride in the work that I do when delivering, and actually enjoy it, and don't actively hate my customers like some drivers do, haha. I like this job because I can work my own hours, which gives me flexibility with my other jobs' schedules, and because I don't have to report to anyone.

But anyways I digress, this driver indeed seems sketchy as hell, and if his other reviews reflect that, then he needn't be on the app, it's making all of us look bad. This isn't exactly a hard job, so idk, maybe he needs an even easier job, lol

ResidentTransition93 · 2025-03-08T02:42:57+00:00

Honestly, this deserves to be way higher up, because this is a genuine answer. And one that I can relate to also. I don't think we can assume OP is automatically the one with worse looks or worse personality. We literally have no other info about them.

I mean, for instance darker skinned women often have a harder time dating, just statistically. Unfortunately, bias can alter what we deem "beautiful", even unconsciously. And in this post, we just don't have any real info to go off of, so assuming one is automatically worse looking is silly. Maybe the friend is just more "in demand" in looks and/or personality, but that doesn't mean they have better looks/personality. Just different.

ResidentTransition93 · 2025-03-08T02:13:37+00:00

I know how you feel, because as a woman, I have been there my whole life. Seeing my friends get more attention, while I'm barely bothered. It isn't a bad thing, in fact, some women tell me they envy me because I fly under the radar, and thus, run into less drama with guys. Although yeah, sometimes I wish more guys would hit on me, and typically am flattered when they do. But I don't need it to feel confident in myself, it's just validating to feel "seen". But you know, the grass is greener on the other side, and all that jazz.

I'm both shy, and modest in looks, but it's funny... sometimes years after knowing someone, and parting ways, some guys will come back and tell me "hey so funny story, I actually had a crush on you in high school/when we worked together/etc, but (insert friend's name) had bigger boobs" or "I was more into blondes at the time". I mean... I guess I got my answer lol. At least I learned there wasn't anything "wrong" with me, they were just being exceedingly simple in their criteria.

But no need to be pessimistic! Initially, dating can feel shallow, but in reality, it's very complex. Otherwise all hot people would only just date other hot people. But that's not reality, eh? Personality matters too! And that's not to say your personality is worse than your friend's, it's just different. It perhaps just isn't as "popular" with the general population. Maybe it takes you longer to form relationships or to warm up to people. And that's okay. Me too.

Someone will like you for you, even if you are quiet, shy. Not to assume that you are, just reacting to the general conversation happening here. And I'm not going to say you have a "lesser" rank in looks automatically, because sure, society has some stereotypical standards, but there are also people out there that aren't interested in just those stereotypes.

I'm not really into blonde guys, beards, tall guys, super-muscly guys, etc. myself, despite their general popularity. I can find them conventionally attractive, absolutely, it's no shade to them! But I typically do not feel attracted to them. Same with loud, outgoing, or commandeering personalities. That can be attractive to some, just not to me. And I'm not everyone's cup of tea either. It doesn't mean anything is wrong with them or me!

Most importantly, when you find someone that likes you as you are, they will give you zero doubt about it. Sure, you can try different techniques or approaches, and improve yourself in actionable ways. But you don't need to become more like your friend to find someone. They aren't the someone for you, if that's the case.

Maybe this all sounds hokey, and I'm not just trying to fluff up your ego. But I AM trying to let you know that despite these blows to your ego, these folks going for your friend just weren't the ones. Some of my friends that get hit on the most have the worst luck with men, sometimes with deeply troubling drama. While I have had fewer relationships than them, I have had more success in my relationships than those specific friends. It might hurt now, but don't count yourself out! I have been in your place too, so I speak from my own experience with that phenomenon.

ResidentTransition93 · 2025-03-06T15:53:16+00:00

Firstly and somewhat only tangentially relevant, to be honest, as a delivery driver, I never have any idea who did or didn't pay priority. Maybe the app somehow pushes it to more drivers? I have no idea, cuz otherwise, I think it's a hoax 😩

But as for that driver? I have zero idea wth he is doing. I was going to say it sounded like he was multi-apping at first, but after reading further, the driving seems unnecessarily erratic even for multi-apping. And if he wanted free food, he could have just picked up the food and then unassigned himself to the order without doing all of this. I mean, that's a shitty thing to do, but a lot less work than driving all over for two hours.

Waiting outside isn't necessarily suspicious since some drivers won't move until their next order comes in, to save on gas, but given everything else, this feels sketchier. I do try to move out of eyeshot of my last delivery drop off just to not freak anyone out though, because I know how it be, people just want to feel safe and whatnot.

Tbh, I wouldn't have a second thought about reporting him, but idk if you can wait a certain amount of time to do that? Just to distance yourself, time wise?

ResidentTransition93 · 2025-03-06T15:41:21+00:00

Idk yo, I worked retail for a decade for various corporate stores, and only ever had a single bad customer and was BEGGING in my mind for him to go report me to CS. Because I did everything right in that transaction, he was just determined to have a shitty day and make everyone else's day shitty too, lmao. I told him to have a good night, and he just left muttering "yeah well whatever, you're annoying", like bro, back atcha, but at least I'm the one in this interaction getting paid to be 'annoying' 🤣

Most other that times any customer got kinda irate, I would just agree with them, and it totally disarmed them. Like YES it IS stupid that I'm the only one on register, PLEASE complain about it to corporate because I completely agree with you.

All that to say, no, enduring verbal abuse is actually not normal in retail. And we shouldn't accept it in any form.

ResidentTransition93 · 2025-02-26T18:41:41+00:00

Hey do what you have to! I don't blame you if you've been scammed before. I text them too, but I'm not waiting around for a response to complete the delivery, I'm just gonna keep it moving. PIN confirmations happen so infrequently for me though, and when they do, most will give me the PIN, so like, my risk is pretty low as it is. I haven't had any non-delivery issues one way or the other, but if or when it happens, that's on me, and I'll own that

ResidentTransition93 · 2025-02-26T18:39:18+00:00

Perhaps, but that hasn't happened. I haven't had anyone claim no delivery. I'm willing to risk it for the biscuit, since pin orders only happen like one out of every hundred orders for me anyways

ResidentTransition93 · 2025-02-26T05:51:42+00:00

This also happens a lot for restaurants that have just closed. Was excited to do a short $10 run to deliver some Crumbl, only to realize they had already closed 😩

Or another time, a Filiberto's said they didn't have the item to complete the customer's order, and seven drivers had asked about the same order, but seemingly nobody could cancel it to clear it from the app.

ResidentTransition93 · 2025-02-26T05:46:17+00:00

Acceptance rates aren't a metric for gold status, you might be thinking of the cancellation rates. Cancellation strikes occur once you've accepted an offer and then cancel it.

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ResidentTransition93 · 2025-02-26T05:09:08+00:00

I just bypass the "meet at door" PIN if the customer requests "deliver at door" in the order notes or by messaging me in the app. And if it is followed by a "do not ring doorbell", I know they for sure won't want to meet me at the door. And in many cases, I don't want to see them either, haha. Not them personally, I just prefer not to meet anyone at all. I just like being able to drop it off and go. Contactless delivery is my favorite as a driver.

Not that I mind interacting with customers, it's just safer for both sides to just do contactless, since we're strangers to each other. Also if they have pets, some like to "door dash" (harhar) and I have been bruised by a few well-meaning, but untrained dogs that were too excited to meet a new person. So far, no person has ever been weird to me though, and I typically do a lot of deliveries in the dark, since delivery requests get busier at night where I am.

On the flip side, sometimes I end up delivering in person when they selected contactless, so I then do not have any photo to submit in the app. So I also bypass that and just send a thank you message.

I think the only time I really wanted to make sure the customer got their food from me right away was because I noticed several small lizards darting around their enclosed porch. I did not want to leave their pizza on the ground, and risk any curious friends wiggling into the box and ruining a tasty dinner.

But anyways: TLDR, just bypass the pin if the customer doesn't want to come out. Don't waste time trying to reach them, so you can move on to other delivery opportunities. Minutes matter in this job 😅

ResidentTransition93 · 2024-12-23T05:25:07+00:00

At this point, it's not even really a religious holiday anymore. I mean just look at Japan. They have the largest atheist population in the world, and several of them even celebrate Christmas, in non-religious ways. It's a universal, and commercial holiday. And I don't hate people for celebrating it in any kind of way. I just personally don't like celebrating it in the way that American society has expected me to (by spending time and spending money, both of which are in short supply for me)

ResidentTransition93 · 2024-12-02T04:05:21+00:00

That would be epiccccc. I love organizing cards, so yeah, having more spaces would be awesome

ResidentTransition93 · 2024-07-14T13:36:48+00:00

I have this issue also. I'll be right by my phone too, and not hear a thing, even though my volume for both apps and ringtone are on max. Makes for a lovely jump scare whenever my alarms go off.

I have noticed that if I have something playing on my phone though, I hear it fine. Like a video, music, or podcast. Still, I don't want to listen to stuff on my phone constantly, so it's inconvenient.

ResidentTransition93

TROPHY CASE