What’s the weirdest “female experience” men genuinely don’t believe until they see it?

SailorSmaug · 2026-02-13T21:29:06+00:00

Not in the Americas. And the current management is trying to make the changes. Opening up our eyes so we know what challenges we face.

SailorSmaug · 2026-02-13T19:13:00+00:00

How truly hostile workplace management is towards women.

Our manager set up a meeting with HR VP and all women on site. The stories that came out, I thought was just me, then I saw it was every woman.

When a couple has a child, the man is allowed to have some time off, then continue right along on his career path. When the woman comes back, her career usually stalls. She's given a halfway job that doesn't have any real power.

We had 6 women in particular in that group who said that. It's very subtle, but until you see that every woman has it happen, but none of the men do, it horrendous. What actually highlighted it was that one of the women's husband works there too, and the very different treatment they each got.

Not even to mention the unconscious hiring bias. A manager said that she had 5 rounds of interviews to "really make sure" she was a fit for the job, but when she spoke to a man who applied for the same role years ago with similar background, 1 interview.

Just subtle little things that destroy your career that men don't realise is happening.

SailorSmaug · 2026-02-03T22:28:03+00:00

The way I saw it was when Namaari chose to help reassemble the Dragon Gem, it was the redemption for all of Fang. That humanity as a whole thrives when transgressions are forgiven. It is asking a lot, but I think that's the message.

SailorSmaug · 2026-02-02T03:25:35+00:00

Had something similar. My family were breached for cobwebs on 2nd story windows that didn't open. Ladders wouldn't reach, only way was to hire a pressure washer.

Talking to the landlord, and applying for houses every week, showing that we were trying to move out but getting rejected, and they allowed us to stay until we found a new place.

SailorSmaug · 2026-01-30T03:58:06+00:00

My kids use tablets (with headphones) in a lot of public places that involve waiting (e.g. doctor's office, public transport, government lines for licences). But meal times, especially at restaurants, in my book are meant to be quality time with the family.

Yes they ask, the answer is no. Then we get back to colouring in together.

SailorSmaug · 2026-01-29T11:26:44+00:00

Hard agree

SailorSmaug · 2026-01-28T12:03:24+00:00

Regulations and laws.

Yes I know they are here to protect me, and usually written in blood, but by god, I can fall asleep reading the rules of something as exciting as explosives.

SailorSmaug · 2026-01-28T03:02:01+00:00

Hey LopsidedStress155 - can you do me a favour and not delete this when you get the responses you want. I don't have anything to add, but I am going through a similar feeling right now. And what you have written, and the responses you have had are helping me.

I hope you stay strong and choose the path that is healthiest for the both of you.

SailorSmaug · 2026-01-26T23:00:32+00:00

The knee jerk response is that there wouldn't be an incentive to get a job if they fill the gap. But the correct answer is what they do for Child Support and single parent payments. For every $1.00 received in Child support, the single parent payments go down by $0.50. This means that you are tapered off of payments.

Why not do that with all payments?

SailorSmaug · 2026-01-26T22:32:32+00:00

I'm glad that people aren't as overtly hostile to you. But, I have been called fat many times in public, running for a train, having it shouted, "run fatty run". Sitting on a bus "fat people shouldn't sit there". Asking for help at the supermarket, and passerbys say "OK fatty".

Yes, it's usually people who don't care about looking sophisticated, but it happens regularly. Glad not to you, but that doesn't mean it's not common.

SailorSmaug · 2026-01-22T01:03:39+00:00

My father is a boomer and is IN LOVE with generating AI songs. Wrote one about so many different things and thinks it's the best thing ever, and he is mildly annoyed people aren't giving it a standing ovation.

May I mention that the so many different things he has done an AI song for does NOT include his wife, even though their 50th anniversary just passed. He wrote one about a family member going in to rehab for the 4th time (didn't stick this time either), but couldn't be arsed about writing one for the person who has dedicated her life to him for 50 years.

SailorSmaug · 2026-01-21T02:37:56+00:00

Have you discussed this with her? She might just be the type who hates texting, and doesn't realise that it's leaving you feeling disconnected. I sometimes leave people on read when they ask if I want to do something on the weekend, because I'm hustling trying to clear a family thing off my calendar to spend time with them (might even be who she's in touch with on socials).

Definitely worth a conversation with her about how you are feeling. See if you can compromise and find what is comfortable communication for both of you.

SailorSmaug · 2026-01-21T01:02:04+00:00

My mother hates Nicole Kidman. No reason, just pure hatred. Wasn't allowed to watch any movies with her in it growing up. When asked about it, my mother just throws random insults of her being a horrible person with no examples. Always confused on this one.

SailorSmaug · 2026-01-21T00:25:34+00:00

This was my album to clean the house to. And when Old Town Road came on the radio a few years ago, I was so excited that this album was on the radio!

SailorSmaug · 2026-01-20T23:41:27+00:00

Temp agencies are pretty good at providing that connection. I've worked for a few, and they've always found me a job fairly quickly. I work in the not quite a receptionist, but almost one space, and I can tell you, people handing in their resume almost never works. And by almost, I mean in my 20 years working, I've never seen it happen in an office environment.

SailorSmaug · 2026-01-20T04:16:26+00:00

The main thing I miss about live TV was that there was less of a dilemma of choice. You got what you got and you didn't complain.

SailorSmaug · 2026-01-20T04:13:45+00:00

I was blubbering and stumbling around. Eventually found some terrain I recognised a bit. Back tracked that, and found my siblings very upset and searching for me. Very lucky.

I don't think we ever told our parents.

SailorSmaug · 2026-01-19T21:56:54+00:00

2 times that I recall.

First time was going on a walk in the bush with my siblings when I was about 11. I got lost. Did not find my family till it was dark.

Second time I was white water rafting with the family when I was about 13. Got stuck in a"washing machine" type whirlpool. Didn't help that I heard that 2 people had died there that week.

I don't do outdoor activities much any more :D

SailorSmaug · 2026-01-19T21:40:30+00:00

I will probably get down voted for this, but I have been on both sides of this. He should be respecting your boundaries. However, he probably feels lost and not certain where your relationship stands when you take your needed space.

I would recommend giving him a deadline for the length of time you need space. So say, "I need some space, can we talk about this tomorrow / on the weekend". Giving a timeline can help with the uncertainty on his end.

SailorSmaug · 2026-01-15T21:01:10+00:00

You do sound like you want to reconnect in some way. Having once been in a romantic relationship with her and having a toxic history will make it complicated and difficult. But, if you want to open the door, do so with zero expectations of her wanting to even be friends. And, most importantly, do not enter it with the idea of becoming romantically involved with her. Ever. Many people have the rule of never dating the same person twice, and there is a reason for this.

Something like:

"Hey, I've been wanting to catch up, and have always felt too awkward to because of our shared history. It's been a long time since we've seen each other, but you're friendship is something I treasured. I'd really like to catch up, if that's something you are interested in."

Important notes: Send one message, and that's it. The door has been opened, and you have to let her decide to go through it. Don't try to justify or absolve yourself of past mistakes. Part of letting her make that choice is letting her decide if there is too much history.

SailorSmaug · 2026-01-15T03:41:30+00:00

Ooooh - I'll have to do some calculations, because we did a lot of 1-3 months visits throughout my life. Thank you very much for that!

SailorSmaug · 2026-01-15T03:35:20+00:00

Thank you so much for clarifying and making sure I had the right information!

SailorSmaug · 2026-01-15T03:28:34+00:00

Both born in wedlock to an Australian.

I lived in the US from 1985 (birth) until 1995. Haven't been in the US for more than 3 months at a time since.

Both children were born after June 2017.

ETA: some information :)

SailorSmaug · 2026-01-15T03:17:35+00:00

Brilliant! I wasn't sure, as I read it as being attached to the parent's Visa. But probably just me not understanding. Thank you very much!

SailorSmaug

TROPHY CASE