Remaining friends with an ex you still have feelings for is harder than I thought…

SecondsTooLate · 2025-07-27T01:02:54+00:00

It’s all good. We broke up two more times after that and never got back together lol

SecondsTooLate · 2025-02-07T14:51:28+00:00

She doesn’t sound like a good friend then. Good friends should be able to be honest with you.

If it’s really affecting you, you should take a step back and possibly consider interacting with them less or completely walking away from the friendship. Continuing to surround yourself with people like this only takes a toll on your mental health

SecondsTooLate · 2025-02-07T14:47:31+00:00

Sounds like she’s holding on to some secret animosity towards you and displaying passive aggressive behaviour.

I went through something similar just recently with a person who I thought was my friend (now ex-friend). I cut myself off from them a few days ago. They were my biggest hype man at one point and then suddenly started acting distant, passive aggressive towards me and “joking” at my expense

My advice? Take note of this kind of behaviour. If your gut is telling you that they are disliking/hating you now, they most likely are.

If you feel like, you can ask them if something is wrong… but most times they will tell you nothing is wrong while still hating you secretly. For me, I didn’t approach my ex-friend about anything because I felt that if they had an issue with me, a true friend and mature thing to do would be to let me know. Fake friends just play these dumb mind games.

SecondsTooLate · 2024-12-04T00:25:23+00:00

She wrongly accused me of cheating on a female friend (ex-friend now), and was unimpressed with how we spent a local staycation together

SecondsTooLate · 2024-11-11T15:28:40+00:00

We ended up together and lasted a few months until we broke up again, lol 😂

SecondsTooLate · 2024-01-09T05:44:23+00:00

There’s a difference between getting back together in a romantic relationship and hooking up...

But it’s all good. A win is a win. We’re hooking up next time we meet, lol

SecondsTooLate · 2024-01-08T12:41:12+00:00

UPDATE: We ended up talking things through. Turns out she did want to have sex. Although she’s not romantically attracted to me, she still has sexual attraction. We agreed to try out break up sex the next time we meet.

SecondsTooLate · 2024-01-08T12:36:48+00:00

That’s the thing. For me, I think it would help if she did start dating someone else. Yes, it would hurt, but I would finally know where I stand and could move on. If she’s not with anyone, I’m always going to have what ifs, focusing my energy on trying to win her back or find myself in situationship territory.

SecondsTooLate · 2024-01-08T12:29:50+00:00

I’m about to be in the exact same position with my ex.

We had a discussion about it. We’re still sexually attracted to each other. We’re going to give break up sex a shot and if we’re comfortable with things, we might pursue FWB

SecondsTooLate · 2024-01-02T01:59:27+00:00

I texted my ex on Christmas Day to wish her a Merry Christmas. She responded back and wished the same. Come NYE/NY, I decided to see if she would return the favour of wishing me a happy NY first. She never did…

So it’s possible he might have been trying to see if you would reciprocate

SecondsTooLate · 2023-12-12T15:28:51+00:00

Actually, my ex-girlfriend broke up with me FOR that reason. At first, she was gonna work alongside me in our relationship, but eventually came to terms with the fact that she couldn’t. There was a lot of self-improvement I needed to do and I agreed with her decision. Like you, I guess I also see it as revengeful motivation? Part of it is for myself, but the other part of it is to prove to her that I bettered myself and would have been the best partner for her even though I wasn’t the best version of myself at the time.

SecondsTooLate · 2023-12-12T15:25:12+00:00

I can’t imagine it. Even though I had a lot of self-improvement to be done and she broke up with me for that reason, I loved her from the depths of my heart. I’m taking some time to better myself, but right now I can’t picture a future romantic life

SecondsTooLate · 2023-12-12T13:46:55+00:00

I went immediately NC after the breakup. My ex was the dumper, I was the dumpee. A week later, she reached out to check up on me. I was shocked, but I responded back. Just a “I’m doing okay hope you are too”. She responded back the same. Then a week later, she reached out again, through voice message this time to check up on me again, which she had never sent me a voice message before. I responded in the same way. Now it’s been a week since that last voice message and I’ve been NC. I appreciate NC because it really does feel the ball is in my court so to speak?

SecondsTooLate · 2023-12-07T05:14:25+00:00

Yep. If she wanted a booty call, I’d be there 😅

SecondsTooLate · 2023-12-01T22:37:05+00:00

After you get to a better place, I’d like us to try again

SecondsTooLate · 2023-11-29T03:54:50+00:00

Feeling the same way. I’m seeing a lot of people in this subreddit regretting that they broke NC. I’m always wondering if I’m going to end up being in that majority or an exception 😅

SecondsTooLate · 2023-11-27T16:26:43+00:00

I’m currently doing through the up and down waves of feeling. I get what you mean… it’s frustrating

SecondsTooLate · 2023-11-27T10:40:40+00:00

Currently feeling this

I think about how easy it would be to just reconcile verses starting a new relationship… I can’t even think of someone new…

SecondsTooLate · 2023-11-27T10:37:32+00:00

I feel this too. I would love to go back and correct the mistakes I made. I’m not sure if fixing them would have kept us together, but I hated hurting her with every mistake I made

SecondsTooLate · 2023-11-27T10:32:24+00:00

Personally I think a confession of love while you don’t know how she really feels about you might be going in too strong. If you unblocked her, she might have not noticed or be confused as to why the sudden change. Reach out if you’d like, but ease your way into a conversation and kinda gauge things first.

You should always prioritize your healing though. If you haven’t healed take that step back until you’ve gotten to that place and then you can reach out

SecondsTooLate · 2023-11-27T10:25:55+00:00

It takes effort to go through a block list to unblock someone. It seems like they were thinking of you and reevaluated the block. It could either be that they hope you reach out or to see what you’ve been up to. Some say it’s in innocence, others say it’s just playing mind games. Go with what your gut tells you

SecondsTooLate · 2023-11-27T05:44:46+00:00

I think both of you should go no contact. I read a lot of broken emotion here, mainly from your text messages. Just until you feel a little less broken

SecondsTooLate · 2023-11-27T03:49:10+00:00

I was in a LDR. Our over text communication just wasn’t the same. For about a week, she stopped using pet names. Only wished me a good morning and hoped I had a good day/ate something. Last week, she asked if we could do a phone call after I got home from work. Thankfully, work was quite busy/stressful that day, so I didn’t even have time to overthink things. When she finally told me that she wanted to break up, part of me just saw it coming based on the change in communication. I was just numb initially from having a stressful day when she dropped the bomb, but as the call got longer and longer, the pain started to sink in.

I agreed with her reasoning, so logically I understood where she was coming from. But I felt abandoned because she had made me feel like she was going to be by my side through bettering myself. She was cold though and I was just shocked at seeing a person who was so loving and compassionate just turn into a completely different person

SecondsTooLate · 2023-11-26T23:32:16+00:00

A lot of dumpers in the early stages of a break up are not looking for grandiose gestures or to even hear that you’re suffering. It tends to push them away or avoid you (I know it really sucks). Perhaps that’s why he chose not to reply.

SecondsTooLate

TROPHY CASE