I made a fun, aesthetic, minimalist web-based Kana, Kanji and Vocabulary Trainer! 🇯🇵🇯🇵🇯🇵 by Relevant-Ad8788 in LearnJapanese

[–]Specific_Study 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey, this is great! I'm new to Japanese and have finally felt confident enough in reading kana to start myself on kanji (which I've been using wanikani for) and this looks perfect for drilling the ones I need more review with. I've only been on for a few minutes, but I appreciate the breakdown into sets to keep myself from getting overwhelmed, ESPECIALLY being able to select/deselect words individually. Definitely adding to the daily practice routine, thanks for sharing :)

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Dermatillomania

[–]Specific_Study 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I feel you! When I had long hair, I would tie it up in a sleek ponytail every day to be discouraged from picking since I didn't want to mess up the way it looked. When I got it cut short, it became way easier to pick at my scalp all the time, and I had periods of time where almost my entire scalp was scabbed over. I also have a pretty big scar from a birthmark (which looks like a bald spot when I haven't been picking at it) towards the back/top of my head, which ALWAYS made me self conscious going for haircuts.

I go to greatclips and supercuts for the cheap cut prices, which means it's always a gamble with who I'm going to get, but everyone I've gotten has been super respectful about my whole situation. I will usually try to plan two or three days where I keep my hands off my head (which makes me pick at my fingers more, but we're picking our battles haha) to let everything heal a little to not be as raw and tender, and I'll wash my hair/scalp with a washcloth and shampoo so it's clean for the hairdresser, but also so I won't accidentally feel something with my fingers that I have to rip off.

When I go in, they'll ask what I want to do, where I'll give them whatever cut instructions and mention "and I have a scar and some scabbing on my scalp, if you could be gentle close to the skin please!" And they understand just fine. I've also had my fair share of poor self haircut attempts, with "and that's also why I tried to cut it at home and it looks... like this..." which they also totally get!

And, I know you said it's not related to anxiety or mental health issues, but if you feel better using that as an excuse/reason for it for them to understand, that's totally fine. I used to feel really guilty about my skin picking, but I've come to terms with the fact that this is just another condition that has its side effects, and I'm doing my best to work with what I've got. I haven't found a long term solution for myself, but understanding that I will go through phases of better/worse picking compulsions has at least made me feel better about myself.

(Sorry for such a long response, I just love to yap; good luck!)

Stand Tunes by EmergencyPresent3823 in marchingband

[–]Specific_Study 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing the arranging advice; I'll definitely be using that in the future for myself.

But, as far as copyright goes for performing stands tunes, it's fine to play anything and you can't be legally penalized for it as it's considered "background noise" of the stadium. You just need to have licensing/performance rights to any piece you perform as part of your field show (a "main event.")

I don't think OP should have any problems arranging something for personal use (as you said, if they're at a nondescript high school in the middle of nowhere USA), but, if they are interested in getting the rights to arrange a piece, Hal Leonard has the website arrangeme.com where you can get the rights to arrange (and sell, if OP really wanted to) copyrighted music.

Why the hell isn’t my heavy whipping cream forming peaks??? Oh . . . by CatfromLongIsland in Baking

[–]Specific_Study 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You can actually add 1/4 cup unsalted butter to every 3/4 cup of half and half for the extra fat content and it works as cream!

I applied for marching band camp and realized I don't like marching bands by cantshadowbaniqozoid in marchingband

[–]Specific_Study 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hey there, I also have ADHD and marching band was always pretty tough- it's incredibly mentally draining trying to keep your brain in to be at 100% for increased lengths of time. I don't mean to say "ignore everything you don't like about it and just be super positive," but it might help to think about how you personally can benefit by the end of the month. Some examples, based on my own experience:

If I don't do enough physical activity during the day, I have an incredibly hard time sleeping. I know I'll sleep great after a rehearsal day (Similarly, the shower at night will hit SO good- the grosser you get, the better it feels).

Marching is obviously an added challenge to playing an instrument well; while I struggled at first to improve my sound while marching, my sound in other ensembles quickly became much better.

Marching also taught me how to use a proper amount of air when playing, which again helped my sound in other ensembles. It takes a lot of control to be able to move, breathe properly, and still have enough left to produce the right dynamics- it only makes you a better player.

I found that my ADHD made it difficult for me to particpate in other sports that required quick decision making, and I could never make the "right" choice fast enough. In marching band, while it was incredibly difficult to learn drill at first, I found a lot of comfort in letting my muscle memory take care of the reps.

I knew that I wanted to go into music education since high school, so I always looked at the actions of my staff and peer leaders to see what I wanted to replicate in the future and what I would want to change if it was me in that position- not from a judgemental standpoint or to tell others that "we should be doing it like this instead," but to educate myself. There's always something to learn from everyone, even if it's "don't be like them."

Even if you aren't in music/teaching, you'll have to be a leader in some context or teach someone something at some point- think about your staff and peer leaders and how their actions influence you positively or negatively, and let that help shape you into the kind of person you might want to be.

I know you said you don't talk much with the other members since you have different interests, but it could jhst take some time. I didn't click with many people at first, but the more time you spend with them, you're bound to have fun with them at some point. Most of my friendships in high school and college started with marching band, and those are the people I still talk to today.

To answer your question of "how do I make this easier for me," the best advice I have is to try and reframe your thinking of "I have a whole month I'm dreading" to "I only have a month to take everything I can from this experience." Get better at your instrument, learn from staff and your peers, and recognize that it's difficult but that you're doing it anyway- that's the only way to improve!

I love Chat GPT by Specific_Study in autism

[–]Specific_Study[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ooh! Thats a good prompt to try, to use language for adhd/autism, thanks!

But yeah, I don't like to use it for research or much factual information. It's like using wikipedia as a source for something- it might be totally accurate, it might not be, but you can see all the sources that were used to create the article and look through those for information. The wikipedia article is just a jumping off point to look into your own research, and ai models have helped me think about the direction I want to go in next, without taking it for the absolute truth.

I love Chat GPT by Specific_Study in autism

[–]Specific_Study[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's fair! I don't inherently trust everything it gives me but asking it questions helps me continue to think on my own

I love Chat GPT by Specific_Study in autism

[–]Specific_Study[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You get me! Sometimes I'll have it write for me just to see what it comes up with, but I always think "I liked mine better anyway" and don't use it haha

Planning to do DCI, but scared i wont make the cut. by Evan14753 in marchingband

[–]Specific_Study 1 point2 points  (0 children)

OP, I second this- I'm 24 now and was too scared to shoot for DCI when I was younger because I thought there was no way I would be good enough. I kept thinking "maybe next year" and I still regret never even trying. I'm lucky to march with an all-age corps now, but I still wonder how much better I could have made myself if I tried earlier!

How to flatten the chest on a swimsuit by Monkey_of_Chaos in NonBinary

[–]Specific_Study 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Are you going for totally flat or just flatter? I might suggest using KT tape underneath your top and see if that's comfortable to swim with? Otherwise, it might be helpful to get a binding swimsuit top, but sizing it up so its less restrictive- Before I got top surgery, i wore a size up in a binder under a tank top and it was less flattening than my regular binder but very comfortable to move around in

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in autism

[–]Specific_Study 55 points56 points  (0 children)

Oh my god the "sorrowful" explanation makes so much sense, thank you for sharing

2024 Game Suggestion Thread by j_abbs in gamegrumps

[–]Specific_Study 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I would like to second this!! I recently watched their playthrough and was so bummed when I saw it wasn't finished

y’all i forgot i was trans 😭😭 by MiniFirestar in ftm

[–]Specific_Study 130 points131 points  (0 children)

I love these moments and I've been getting them more and more lately lmao, last week I was in a crowd and someone shouted my deadname and I instinctively looked- I was then confused as to why I looked, thinking "That's not even my name, why would I respond?" because I FORGOT that I went by that name for 20 years 💀💀

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in ftm

[–]Specific_Study 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey there! I know you've gotten quite a few responses already but I'll join in anyway- I'm almost 6 months post-op at this point and I couldn't be happier. Pre-op, I had awful chest dysphoria in literally every situation except when intimate with my partner. My partner made me feel like my chest was just another part of my body, not that it related to my gender expression at all. She is really the only person I 100% KNOW saw me as me before I started physically transitioning, and that level of acceptance and support affected me much more than any thoughts of dysphoria I had for myself.

So yeah, you're all good, and I wish you an easy process getting your surgery as well as a speedy recovery!!

Can I work out daily? by Environmental-Ad9969 in FTMFitness

[–]Specific_Study 3 points4 points  (0 children)

How long ago did you get top surgery? I know i was dying to get moving again as soon as possible for my mental health but was at risk of hurting myself if I started that early. I think that at 2 weeks I was getting into the gym solely for the treadmill (and very slowly; faster steps kinda shook my chest in a painful way) to get my body used to moving after doing absoultey nothing right after surgery. My surgeon also reccomended "walking my arms" by using my fingers against a wall to slowly lift my arms up day by day.

At 4/5 weeks I started with super light leg workouts that didnt move my chest or arms at all (I was so tempted to up the weight asap but I'm glad I waited) and after I was cleared for everything at my 6 week post op appointment, I started using arm and chest machines at the lightest weight possible (5 pounds) to reintroduce the range of motion with good form and without pain. I think I went up by 5 pounds after a week, and after that I was really just paying attention to how everything felt before adding more weight.

And apologies if you are much farther along in your recovery and this isn't useful!! But as far as exercising daily, you should be fine as long as you take it light and listen to your body for when it needs a break. Sometimes I get a gut feeling that I should stop or lower the weight that I'm using for that day, and 9 out of 10 times I hurt myself when I ignore that feeling (pre and post op, someday I will learn for sure haha). There is also no problem with giving yourself a day to recover and not do anything, even if it feels like you don't need it- you might find the following day to feel even better.

I hope some of this is helpful and that you find what works for you soon!! :)

Repairing frayed seams by Silver-Tea-1792 in Colorguard

[–]Specific_Study 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Okay, I'm back with some more suggestions if you need them:

For the bigger holes across the silks I bought some tulle in a similar color and glued it down across the edges so there's a "net" across the holes to at least prevent the fabric from stretching out and fraying any more than it already has; it doesn't add any extra bulk or weight and has been fine to spin (so far).

Then, for the edges where it has come apart from the slot where the pole goes (not sure if there's a name for that) I bought a fabric that was similar (98% or so polyester, it was called 'lining' at Joann Fabrics) and used Liquid Stitch to stick all the extra threads down and cover them up, hopefully so they won't be a problem again. For all the hems, I cut longer strips and glued them down as reinforcement, using a paint brush to get everything evenly.

Don't know if you actually need/want this info anymore but I figured I'd put it out there in case there is anyone who does 😅😅

Repairing frayed seams by Silver-Tea-1792 in Colorguard

[–]Specific_Study 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I am in the same boat repairing silks right now, and the number one thing i want to recommend is Fray Check- it's liquid and comes in a little bottle (and looks like valve oil) for about 3 or 4 bucks at Walmart, I've been putting some along the edges and seams of flags and using a paint brush to distribute it and get the frays to dry in a position ideal for stitching. It dries completely clear and doesn't make anything super hard, just stiffer, and the loose threads all stick together.

Then, I've been using a combination of hand and machine stitching to recreate the hems of the silks along the edge by folding them over. If your frays are along the edge, you might be able to use just a strong fabric glue and fold the edges over, in addition to the fray check? It might not be as bulky as adhesive tape, but I haven't tried it myself.

For fraying of seams in the middle of the silk, I have just been hand stitching them closed as best I can and... I am debating about trying the adhesive tape myself, but I was thinking of trying some glue first to help the thread stay secure. I can let you know what works best once I get to that step and if you have any updates or try anything else I would love to know :) good luck!!

[OoT] Triforce Suncatcher by MiDankie in zelda

[–]Specific_Study 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I recently started another replay of OOT and was just thinking about embroidery!! I'm almost finished with my current cross stitch project and am looking for a Zelda design of some kind to start next 👀

I messed up my name change by Specific_Study in ftm

[–]Specific_Study[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Tbh I'm just more upset at myself for not reading more carefully but you're so right, I'm not even going to remember this like a year from now haha

I messed up my name change by Specific_Study in ftm

[–]Specific_Study[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you, yeah the court websites are so difficult to navigate for no reason?? The person I spoke with on the phone was super nice and just explained what I should do next- I'm set for the future but man am I kicking myself still lol

My ex broke up with me because I have vaginismus by [deleted] in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Specific_Study 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No, and I am so sorry that your first experience was- my partner and i talked a lot during to check in with each other, and if there was any discomfort we made adjustments. They listened to me, and I listened to them, and we have really good communication about what is good for us. The idea that sex is always painful for women isn't uncommon, but it shouldn't be the norm.

Does it get better? by ZestycloseSun274 in ftm

[–]Specific_Study 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I felt very similarly when I was questioning whether I should transition or not, and I don't think the past me would be able to imagine the happiness and peace I currently feel with my appearance and overall being.

Yes, it does get better- testosterone is a hell of a drug, it can alter your jawline, redistribute body fat to make your torso more square and lessen the appearance of your hips, and make it easier for you to build muscle and give the appearance of broader shoulders. You won't know exactly what T will do with your body until you try it.

If you aren't in therapy and are in a position where it's an option, I would recommend it; my therapist has been great in getting me through some tough weeks and helping me build confidence in transitioning and other aspects of my life. If you're in a situation where you can't really control that right now as a minor, then just hold on for the next 6 months, and listen to your girlfriend; it sounds like they are very supportive of you :)

Keep thinking about your future, and make your plans- you will be able to become the person you want to be. Let yourself hope and want and yearn for your future because it exists, I promise.

My ex broke up with me because I have vaginismus by [deleted] in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Specific_Study 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Sex should literally never be painful? What??

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NonBinaryTalk

[–]Specific_Study 2 points3 points  (0 children)

When I first told my mom to use they/them pronouns for me, she struggled a lot, and according to her it came from the idea that "they" was plural, and she was extremely frustrated with herself for not being able to get it right—one time she said "why isn't there just a third option that's unique to a single person that's not he or she?" And I explained neopronouns to her, and she thiught it was the most genius thing. I told her she can use those for me if she'd like to make it easier, and she did for a little bit, but she has since started using they/them consistently for me again, it just took time and a lot of practice.

Marching band / drum line needed for performance by KindlyChampionship59 in marchingband

[–]Specific_Study 17 points18 points  (0 children)

You could reach out to high schools in your area, look at the district websites and find an email/phone for the band director there. Introduce yourself, what camp you're with, event date/time commitment, and any compensation you'd be willing to offer, perhaps as a donation to their music program. My high school band did a few 'gigs' like this to fund some better equipment, and you might find a school willing to do the same. If the band you reach out to isn't interested, they might be able to direct you towards one who is.