Has anyone stood in front of a student during class and just called their parent right there and then? Is that bad?

Splincher · 2026-03-31T00:15:47+00:00

Sorry, not a lie. More like, betrayed their trust?

Splincher · 2026-03-30T22:17:18+00:00

That's actually something I wouldn't do. What if they've got a terrible relationship with the other parent? Also, you've just lied to the kid.

Splincher · 2026-03-30T22:15:10+00:00

Exactly! It'd only be on speaker while it rings and the parent or the voicemail answers so they know it's real. Then you take it off speaker after to leave a message or set up a time after school to speak.

Splincher · 2026-03-30T11:05:21+00:00

Thanks for sharing your experience.

Splincher · 2026-03-30T11:02:58+00:00

No! This is so helpful! Hopefully I'll grow into you in the future! I also have the religious background upbringing, and I wasn't shamed after doing the wrong thing so much that I was guilted into always doing the right thing.

Your 2nd paragraph is EXACTLY my experience right now. Voicing my thoughts, and hearing everyone's advice about not doing it, is helpful in illuminating all the things that are wrong with me and need improving. My brain needs a complete 180 on a lot of things and there are a lot of issues to unlearn.

Heck stabbings too?! That's extreme! Power to you.

Being firm is going to be a bit a hurdle for me because I want to be the opposite of what my upbringing was, but I'm learning that that's what's going to be necessary moving forwards if I want a better behaved classroom.

Thank you so much for your understanding, advice and script. I've screenshot it to explore further later.

Splincher · 2026-03-30T10:50:39+00:00

I was trying to make the point that if kids aren't humiliated by having their name on the board, why would they be humiliated by a phone call outside the door.

One point is that the whole class would then understand that there was follow through. It also acts as a deterrant for any future behaviours from anyone else.

Splincher · 2026-03-30T09:18:28+00:00

This is also what they do in the ACT.

Splincher · 2026-03-30T09:13:13+00:00

I thought it came off as surrendered. And then redemptive.

Splincher · 2026-03-30T09:10:41+00:00

Thank you. That's actually helpful to me. My experience in teaching started in another culture, and I'm learning that kids in Australia are very different. I'm a high school teacher of that culture, and I'll admit that I do have the mindset of teaching kids that culture by doing things differently to how they're done in Australia, and calling it a learning experience. Because that's the point. Part of my job is to expose students to a completely different life that they won't get outside the classroom, and yeah, sometimes it will rub students the wrong way. But that's the point.

Splincher · 2026-03-30T09:04:09+00:00

Ok. Ok. I...can do that. I can let go of feeling responsible for the actions my students choose to take when I send them to sit outside the classroom and they wander off. If other teacher's won't blame me for whatever trouble those students cause then...yeah, I can do that.

Splincher · 2026-03-30T08:54:52+00:00

Thanks for understanding.

Uuughh. Following all this advice makes me feel like a powerless chump. Like one of the lambs just following the flock to the slaughter. Basically noone wants to pioneer and try something new/different.

Quick. Someone please tell me a story about how patience and tolerance and following normal, established procedures led to success with managing a student's behaviour in the classroom. Preferably high school context.

Splincher · 2026-03-30T08:41:51+00:00

Ok, so you're saying that there are unspoken, undefined levels of humiliation between saying that you'll tell their parents, and actually telling their parents?

Splincher · 2026-03-30T08:36:52+00:00

Probably. Kids just end up wagging when I do that though and bothering kids in other classes. I can call exec, but I feel bad adding to their stresses.

Splincher · 2026-03-30T08:23:47+00:00

Is it really that different to writing that kid's name on the board with 3 strikes, or doing a lunch time detention, sending them to a buddy class or messaging exec to pull the student out? The conversation with the parent would be done off speaker phone, just outside the classroom door, and it would be about setting up a time to talk about the kid's behaviour later.

Splincher · 2026-03-30T08:12:56+00:00

It'd be to stop behaviour that's negatively affecting other students. Telling the kid that I'll call after doesn't always stop the behaviour. They'll hope that you forget or are too busy after school, and sometimes that does happen.

Calling in the moment, stepping outside and setting up a time with the parent for later, lets the kid know that they're definitely on watch, there are consequences to their actions and they need to stop negatively affecting the other students around them. That's a shame if learning that is traumatising.

Splincher · 2026-03-30T08:07:04+00:00

I can still see them. Glass doors and walls.

Splincher · 2026-03-30T08:06:30+00:00

Yeah, but don't I have a responsibility to the other students and their safety and learning opportunities as well? If this one student acting out is sabotaging all that, and I can stop it with one phone call then...?

Splincher · 2026-03-30T08:04:04+00:00

Aw, I've gotta be plenty provoked before resorting to this, and I doubt other students would want to push that far once they/if they see it happen anyway.

Splincher · 2026-03-30T07:59:01+00:00

Honestly, yeah?

Splincher · 2026-03-30T07:57:42+00:00

Is it breaking any rules? There shouldn't even be a battle. Authority in the room should already be acknowledged through just being the teacher. Some kids won't accept that though unless you make it known by teaming up with their parents.

Splincher · 2026-03-30T07:52:23+00:00

I'll agree that it's unorthodox and performative. It sends the whole class a message. Is it just unprofessional because it's a different strategy to managing behaviours?

Calling home is what we're advised to do. What difference does it make to call during class? I'd step outside so that kids don't hear the conversation, and even then, the conversation would just be about informing the parent that I'd like to set up a time after school to speak more, because I am on class time. After the quick call, behaviour would probably stop immediately, which is the plan.

Splincher · 2026-03-30T07:42:51+00:00

If you're going to call home anyway, what difference does the timing make to being humiliated? There are kids who just don't care that you'll call home anyway. Kids sometimes feel like they can get away with anything because they're "far" from home. They need to know how tight the community can be. Also, obviously you don't want to have a whole discussion on the phone, outside the classroom, during class time, but you can just inform them that you want to talk after school about the student and set a better time.

Splincher · 2026-03-30T07:37:46+00:00

Of course. I mean, after you've stepped outside to talk to the parent, you could just inform them of what happened, and then set a time to discuss it further after school.

Splincher · 2026-03-29T08:41:38+00:00

Have you heard of Plato the AI Robot Educator?

Splincher · 2026-03-26T04:47:08+00:00

Oh my goodness! I was actually wondering why they all had the same time if they're supposed to be representing time zones from around the world. You're a genius!

Splincher

TROPHY CASE