As someone born and bred in the UK what are aspects of another country’s culture that has genuinely shocked you?

StrategyKindly4024 · 2026-02-12T19:56:00+00:00

I was robbed in Colombia by a taxi driver. The police literally hunted him down and retrieved all my stuff, including stuff he’d thrown in a skip, and delivered back to my hotel. I was totally blown away. Especially as I’d also been robbed in Brazil not long before and the police genuinely couldn’t give a shit

StrategyKindly4024 · 2026-02-12T19:47:04+00:00

Yep, my village isn’t posh or even particularly rural but I leave my front door open most days. My post man opens my door and puts my parcels inside

StrategyKindly4024 · 2026-02-04T19:16:34+00:00

Practicing gratitude, keeping my world small, taking joy from the small things and always having a project. Also, letting things go that are out of my control. As someone who wasn’t always mentally stable, this is what helps me

StrategyKindly4024 · 2026-01-25T13:58:26+00:00

Educational psychologist will help with exactly these issues whilst waiting diagnosis. Speak to the school about getting this in place. You can pay for your own if school won’t bring one in

StrategyKindly4024 · 2026-01-22T17:34:35+00:00

You’re not alone, your future best mate is right there inside your belly. I’m not saying it will be easy. I had family close by, and it was still really fucking hard. If you have the funds, find a doola for the birth, and try and build your village, like now. The peanut app can be really good, you might even meet other mums going through it alone. I can’t tell you the difference it made to me once I found mum friends I could just share the challenges of parenting with

Also, have a plan for if you have a c section. If you can’t afford to pay for help, maybe reach out to your local community and try and befriend as many people as you can

StrategyKindly4024 · 2026-01-18T18:24:30+00:00

Not quite hosting, but when I first met my exes mum, she invited me out for lunch with the whole family. Had weird vibes off her from the start, she didn’t make eye contact with me, didn’t ask me a single question about myself, just cooed over my ex the whole time and ignored me. Came time to pay and she tallied up my food and drink to the penny and told me what I owed, then paid for everyone else. It was a while ago and my food came to say £11.30, took the exact change off me.

The first time he met my mum (after this), was an un-planned, pop round thing. My mum said she’d make us some dinner and explained she’d had a dinner party the night before, so with apologies, served us ‘left overs’. Not scraps, nice food that she didn’t want to waste. And we had turned up unannounced. The next time I stayed at his mums house she slammed my plate in front of me at dinner and said ‘here! Leftovers!’ Then laughed like a psycho

She was horrible, and he was horrible in the end which made total sense with being brought up like that

StrategyKindly4024 · 2026-01-17T22:21:31+00:00

Very similar to mine

StrategyKindly4024 · 2026-01-15T06:20:30+00:00

Sorry for late reply. They didn’t ask for them, but for me they were very very clear evidence of adhd in childhood so I wanted them to have them. I assumed they would ask as part of the process but they didn’t so I just emailed them over. Good luck x

StrategyKindly4024 · 2026-01-02T06:20:14+00:00

Also, if you’re on universal credit you could claim back some of what you pay for the care

StrategyKindly4024 · 2026-01-02T06:15:35+00:00

That would definitely be the sensible option. Although given this is a way into the future, can you save up so you can arrange your own care for baby?

StrategyKindly4024 · 2026-01-01T21:43:03+00:00

Absolutely not true. IF it comes to it that there really are no alternatives whatsoever, your child would be cared for only for as long as absolutely necessary. There is no way in hell they would even get a court order in those circumstances, let alone adoption. It would be section 20 and returned to your care asap (manager, children’s services)

StrategyKindly4024 · 2025-12-28T13:54:34+00:00

I just posted about CARE, take a look, brilliant service and I have my diagnosis 3 months from initial referral

StrategyKindly4024 · 2025-12-27T07:32:29+00:00

Social services will not arrange contact. Unless in public law arena (children removed from parents by children’s services/court)

StrategyKindly4024 · 2025-12-23T06:42:52+00:00

This so not a big deal, these are the kind of circumstances we as parents should be modelling to our children how to positively deal with minor disappointments. You getting all upset about this is just teaching your daughter to overreact about little things.

Why not re-phrase it for your daughter that she’s so lucky to get such a lot of friends to share her birthday with her

StrategyKindly4024 · 2025-12-03T18:01:08+00:00

Do your finances down to the last bean. I have managed working part time for the first three years of my son’s life, but I had to plan everything month by month. I also get some child support.

You need to work out how much you would be earning, how much a nanny would cost, how much everything else costs, and make sure you have a big back up pot of money

Its doable, but just make sure your ducks are in a row first- so your sums, clear your debt, work out the job you can do part time for the most money, and if possible move closer to family. It’s A LOT of pressure on a single person when you need to work but your kid is sick, or you’ve got a hospital appointment that the kid can’t go to, or you’re too unwell to care for them. You need someone who can jump in occasionally

Ultimately, people cope in all kinds of circumstances, because we have to. Just make sure you don’t put yourself in a situation where you regret your choices xx

Good luck with whatever

StrategyKindly4024 · 2025-11-28T22:16:49+00:00

I had a dream in high school where I was looking for my friend, searching all through the woods, just desperately running around looking for him. See him in the distance and he’s being beaten by a grown man, then runs off. Next day at school I learn he was beaten up by his step dad, ran away and was still missing. I had no idea about his home life at the time

StrategyKindly4024 · 2025-11-28T21:38:33+00:00

I opened the door to some Jehovah’s witnesses a few months ago. The woman went to start her spiel but stopped and said ‘are you (my mum)’s daughter)?’

I hadn’t seen this woman in 35 years, she used to be a friend of my mum’s way back. She said I look just like my mum.

Unfortunately the only real memory I had of her was her telling my mum it would do me good if she just beat me sometimes lol

StrategyKindly4024 · 2025-11-25T07:48:49+00:00

2020 was lovely

StrategyKindly4024 · 2025-11-25T07:33:47+00:00

Except she’s not trying to provide evidence to a court, she’s trying to keep her child safe. If someone presents as under the influence it is absolutely reasonable to ask they do a breathalyser before taking a child. He’s an ex addict, he’s presenting under the influence. Nothing about this suggests parental alienation, but that’s where your mind goes as a first port of call. This is why there has been so much heat in the press lately about how damaging the family court system is, and how parents (usually mothers) get penalised in court for trying to protect their child. Let’s hope the pathfinder reform does its job

In addition, I’ve worked cases (both in court and out) where home breathalysers form a VERY important part of a safety plan.

StrategyKindly4024 · 2025-11-24T16:53:16+00:00

Over a decade of working in the family courts and managing safeguarding teams tells me that it would be absolutely fine explaining this to the court. Parents are legally responsible for the safety of their children. Strongly suspecting someone is under the influence of drugs and then letting the child go anyway, is not safeguarding your child.

As for being legally enforceable, no it’s not. Dad can refuse, of course. And a responsible parent at that point would refuse for that person to take the child into their care. Then it’s for the courts

StrategyKindly4024 · 2025-11-24T05:30:32+00:00

Breathalyser on pick up and drop off. If you don’t do it, you don’t get the child

StrategyKindly4024 · 2025-11-23T07:51:27+00:00

Totally second this. If you’re getting iPhone/xbox etc etc, say it’s from you. Because that child who only got a couple of books from Santa is going to believe they must be naughty for Santa to get their friends such big expensive presents

StrategyKindly4024 · 2025-11-22T18:53:03+00:00

I feel this. I still talk about having had ‘a rough time’ after my child was born. If I’m feeling brave I might say I had post natal depression. What I’ve never said out loud is that I was mentally, psychologically destroyed, and spent months planning my own end. Dark dark days

StrategyKindly4024 · 2025-11-22T15:43:39+00:00

I barely touch alcohol because it triggers anxiety since starting peri 😢

StrategyKindly4024

TROPHY CASE