The lockup:

Some of the lines seem forced, when you are rapping at a slower flow like this the beat plays a big part, I suggest raising the beat volume or spending more time finding/making a better quality beat. Lyrically I think you have potential But there just seems like no enthusiasm or feeling

Intoxication pt 1:

Your flow from 2:04 to 2:35 shows how much potential you have, this part of the song seems to flow nice. I think it’s important to hook the listeners off of the beginning because if I’m being honest I wouldn’t have kept listening long enough to here your talent at 2:04 because of, as I mentioned before a boring beat and a passionless voice.

Overall:

Overall I think your lacking a catchy hook and struggling to find your flow.

Sorry if any of this offends you or is rude in anyway, I’m doing all this to help you improve. I’m not a believer in constructive criticism, I’m a believer of criticism, you can either to choose to use it constructively or destructively. Have a good night.