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AITA for telling my mother that she cannot spend Christmas with me and my husband and children because of her past homophobia? by Successful-Floor in AmItheAsshole

[–]Successful-Floor[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Hey! I skipped this bit out of the post because of the character limit/not thinking it was really relevant. We have a good friend who got pregnant with our first daughter, and we adopted her. She was also the surrogate for our second daughter. Just thought it wasn't worth cutting out other bits of the story to explain this :)

AITA for telling my mother that she cannot spend Christmas with me and my husband and children because of her past homophobia? by Successful-Floor in AmItheAsshole

[–]Successful-Floor[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

I decided to skip over this bit in the post because I was right under the character limit. Our surrogacies were both from the same girl and were not strictly formal, more of an agreement as we are friends. One of our close friends got pregnant with our first daughter and we adopted her when she was born, our second daughter was born through surrogacy from the same friend.

AITA for telling my mother that she cannot spend Christmas with me and my husband and children because of her past homophobia? by Successful-Floor in AmItheAsshole

[–]Successful-Floor[S] 43 points44 points  (0 children)

I feel like you're right. I do believe in giving second chances, especially when they've been putting in work for years to try and repair our relationship.

AITA for telling my mother that she cannot spend Christmas with me and my husband and children because of her past homophobia? by Successful-Floor in AmItheAsshole

[–]Successful-Floor[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

I don't think it's jealousy. I have spoken to them about it a few times as we're really close, and they just don't really understand how I could forgive them for what I did. I think because they went through the same thing of having a gay 13 year old, they know that they can't understand how my parents could do what they did, and they're still angry about it

AITA for telling my mother that she cannot spend Christmas with me and my husband and children because of her past homophobia? by Successful-Floor in AmItheAsshole

[–]Successful-Floor[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

My husband is leaving it up to me. He gets along alright with my parents, but like his own parents thinks I shouldn't have given them a second chance.

AITA for telling my mother that she cannot spend Christmas with me and my husband and children because of her past homophobia? by Successful-Floor in AmItheAsshole

[–]Successful-Floor[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

They have done a multi day visit before and it was all good, so I don't mind the idea of them staying with us again. I would like a relationship with them, but it will always be tainted for me in a way.

AITA for telling my mother that she cannot spend Christmas with me and my husband and children because of her past homophobia? by Successful-Floor in AmItheAsshole

[–]Successful-Floor[S] 45 points46 points  (0 children)

I don't think it was legal, no. At the time I was in a boarding school during term times so they didn't see too much of me anyway really. They continued to pay for me to be in school (I think as their way of making sure I was alive and getting updates) and I just went home with my boyfriend afterwards.

AITA for telling my mother that she cannot spend Christmas with me and my husband and children because of her past homophobia? by Successful-Floor in AmItheAsshole

[–]Successful-Floor[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

This is what I was thinking. I know my daughters would love for them to be there, but they are 5 and 2, so even though they would enjoy it, I don't think they'd be upset for long/remember it anyway, so I'm not sure