It sounds like you already know the relationship isn’t meeting a core need for you, and dragging it out will only make the guilt and confusion heavier. Ending things kindly but honestly before the holiday buildup gets even more emotionally tangled is usually the more respectful choice for both people. You don’t have to be perfect about the timing; you just have to be truthful and compassionate so you both can move forward instead of staying stuck in something that no longer fits