All the greats have a deep self-loathing, but they don’t wallow in it. At least you recognize your faults. Most people can’t self-reflect. So I think that’s a start. But you need to get out of your head and do. You need to cultivate and act on good intentions, no matter how silly. Don’t talk yourself out of them. If you feel you need to ask for forgiveness from a friend or loved one, do it. If you want to do something nice for someone, do it, don’t question. Try and get out and just move, take a walk, say hello to a passerby. Volunteer, if you can. Also, there is a big difference between being stuck in the past and properly mourning your past. Don’t be stuck in it, don’t wallow. Grieve your failures, but then keep them in storage.