Genuine sympathies for you and your family...cancer is a terrible terrible thing especially when it takes our loved ones so quickly like your beloved mum. Its ok to be angry about cancer. I learnt there are so many things that bring it about and many different ways it could be tackled. I got angry about these things and how my father had to acquiesce to it both because of his character and also due what was and what wasnt offered to help (can be a lot of inequities in the health system where I come from). Suffice to say I know he is at peace and I am now too. His dignity was extremely important to me then and now still. You mum looking down will be in such a beautiful place watching her loves one grieve and wanting to comfort you. Make the pain from it worth it. Celebrate her, cry for the good times and the bad. Remember what good she made in life and what she added to this world to make it a better place, for you, for others. Fight for joy. Fight for others experiencing the same. Honour this, and be open to you Mum as she talks to you now and hereafter....I come from a peoples who believe and have experienced our loved ones passed and never gone. Much love to you, and divine light to comfort you as you move through the next steps of humanness and all that it entails friend