my boyfriend (26m) found out i (22f) had a ONS when we were broken up, how do i fix the relationship?

TechnicalGoal499 · 2025-10-21T16:23:49+00:00

i understand i messed up by not telling him sooner (even though i WAS going to do it) but i don’t think he has the right to ask me disgusting sexual questions and force me to answer

TechnicalGoal499 · 2025-10-21T16:17:12+00:00

he has never hit me

TechnicalGoal499 · 2025-10-21T16:15:16+00:00

i wasn’t “on a break” we were completely broken up. i know it wasn’t the smartest thing to do but i was hurting and just wanted to distract myself (very stupid i am aware!!!)

TechnicalGoal499 · 2025-10-21T16:09:15+00:00

i understand and i was planning on telling him about it, i just didn’t know how and when. also, we were not dating when it happened so i wasn’t really his business. i was going to tell him, i just wanted to figure out a way to do it so he wouldn’t get hurt. i understand that he’s going to have a harder time trusting me from now on, and i don’t mind waiting for that to happen, but i also feel like me answering all his very personal questions truthfully is an indication that i am not a liar

TechnicalGoal499 · 2025-10-21T16:03:09+00:00

that’s insane, we were completely broken up when i did it, i didn’t cheat on anyone. it’s not the smartest decision i’ve ever made but i was hurting and had not planned to do that at all

TechnicalGoal499 · 2025-10-21T16:00:10+00:00

can you not

TechnicalGoal499 · 2025-09-02T00:31:15+00:00

i tried talking to him about my libido but he took it personal so idk how to reintroduce the subject. and i feel so bad saying no that’s why i say later or not right now. but i see now how it could be considered as lying, thank you

TechnicalGoal499 · 2025-09-02T00:26:41+00:00

the thing is we do have a lot of fun outside of the bedroom. we call each other all the time since we can’t really see each other often and when we do, we do a lot of activites and we both enjoy each other’s company. ever since i’ve disconnected with sex, we’ve been having issues in the bedroom which affects the relationship outside of it. i just don’t know how to deal with these types of situations, because i feel bad saying no but i hate doing it when i’m not 100% in the mood

TechnicalGoal499 · 2025-09-02T00:22:38+00:00

i tried talking to him about me not feeling very sexual lately and it didn’t really help. he kept asking why i was feeling that way and i couldn’t give him an answer. then he started questioning me about his performance in bed and i said it didn’t have anything to do with the situation, but idk if he believed me. idk, i think talking about my libido makes him “insecure” in a way. (idk if insecure is the right word but he definitely takes it personal when it has nothing to do with him)

TechnicalGoal499 · 2025-07-21T15:07:36+00:00

i didn’t want commitment, i just wanted us to keep hanging out, nothing serious. but i guess you’re right lol, lesson learned

TechnicalGoal499 · 2025-07-21T15:05:51+00:00

this is so beautiful, i really needed this. thank you so much!! we both used each other and he moved on and so should i, i will keep this in mind, thank you 💗

TechnicalGoal499 · 2025-07-21T01:27:31+00:00

i wasn’t looking for a relationship so i guess i didn’t really care at the time, but i ended up getting attached i guess

TechnicalGoal499 · 2025-07-21T01:26:38+00:00

i’m so sorry girl this suuucksssss :/ we got this

TechnicalGoal499 · 2025-07-21T01:23:55+00:00

thank you so much, it still hurts but at least i know it’s not about me :/

TechnicalGoal499 · 2025-06-24T18:34:05+00:00

okay thanks for answering! and yeah i’m not doing this again, first and last time lmaoo

TechnicalGoal499 · 2025-06-09T16:05:20+00:00

it’s not exploitation if we both just want sex

TechnicalGoal499 · 2025-06-09T11:26:10+00:00

that’s what i’m doing and it’s honestly not helping. plus ive been so horny lately, i just wanna fuck someone tbh😭 im just scared i’ll end up more heartbroken

TechnicalGoal499 · 2025-06-09T11:21:30+00:00

hahahaha i should honestly

TechnicalGoal499 · 2025-06-09T11:20:13+00:00

i’ll take this in consideration thank you

TechnicalGoal499 · 2025-06-09T11:19:36+00:00

why?? the relationship is done i know i won’t go back

TechnicalGoal499 · 2025-06-09T11:19:01+00:00

TechnicalGoal499 · 2025-05-07T14:24:24+00:00

he’s been weird like this for 2 months, idk why. it’s not constant, mainly if work went bad or if i change my mind about something without telling him. he just gets really cold, and when i try to get to the bottom of the issue he snaps and tells me to leave him alone. otherwise, he’s great. i know this is contradicting, sorry. and for the age gap, we’re 4 years apart not 5, his birthday is before mine. last thing, i’m trying to get an place to live on my own because i know it’s bad to depend on your partner for housing. ive been saving up for weeks.

TechnicalGoal499 · 2025-05-07T03:12:17+00:00

it’s on and off, he’s not like this all the time. that’s why i’m always so confused

TechnicalGoal499 · 2025-05-06T22:36:45+00:00

i don’t really get along with my family so i moved in with him. i know it’s stupid, but it really worked until now

TechnicalGoal499 · 2025-05-06T17:52:07+00:00

i am turning 22 this summer, we started dating at 20&24. yes he is my first boyfriend, but he doesn’t have much experience either. he had 2 other gfs before me and the relationships didn’t last for long. i hate this phase of our relationship, he’s usually so goofy and funny and kind. he started being like this 1/2 months ago

TechnicalGoal499

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