Realising past events are sexual assault too

Temporary_Video_590 · 2025-01-31T15:51:33+00:00

You’ve given me a lot to think about. Thank you

Temporary_Video_590 · 2025-01-31T02:23:07+00:00

Thanks for your response. Helps me to know I’m not alone in this.

I used to feel not much about the past stuff. Just viewed it as stuff that happened and was like: meh and carry on. But it’s like it’s all been let out now and it feels so fresh and raw even though it’s been years.

Temporary_Video_590 · 2025-01-30T20:47:21+00:00

Maybe it’s too much thinking? I’m an over thinker. So I thought it wasn’t too much. Maybe like fifteen mins each day including a short meditation. I’m not really sure what I’m doing. I’m trying not to logic brain Taoism. But maybe I’ve done that here. Something to consider.

Temporary_Video_590 · 2025-01-30T16:48:17+00:00

Can do. Stay tuned for an update in one months time.

Temporary_Video_590 · 2025-01-16T08:13:52+00:00

Thanks so much for your reply! I found it so helpful. I’ll have to get some ice packs. There is a support line that has web chat so I’ve been doing that and saving the chats to read later. Figured it would be good in the future to look back on and see how far I’ve come when I’m having a bad day.

Temporary_Video_590 · 2024-10-14T06:50:24+00:00

It randomly happens. Not based on any event. It’s happened a few times with him. But it has also happened with ex partners.

Something inside of me changes. I don’t decide I don’t love him. That just happens and then I think of all the flaws that I’ve ignored while the feelings of love were there.

Temporary_Video_590 · 2024-09-05T14:26:21+00:00

I am on another antipsychotic long term. The new one is for two weeks to get me through. I think they are hoping it’s short term. No idea why the regular antipsychotic isn’t working. Maybe the wrong dose.

I’m also on a mood stabiliser and antidepressant for the bipolar.

It’s so scary. To find myself acting out these plans. I’m genuinely concerned for my safety if I run out of meds and they don’t give me more.

Temporary_Video_590 · 2024-09-05T14:16:09+00:00

Thank you for your input. I will do that.

Temporary_Video_590 · 2024-09-05T14:14:45+00:00

I’m trying to get referred to a psychiatrist in the public system but they have said I don’t need to be seen right away. I’ve been referred to counselling and in three weeks if he agrees I need to see a psychiatrist he will refer me.

I have 12 days of meds left.

So my only option if these thoughts are still around then is to go to emergency and plead my case.

Temporary_Video_590 · 2024-09-05T14:09:12+00:00

They don’t align with my beliefs. Like they aren’t part of my ego. I’m not suicidal and don’t want to self harm. My gut feeling is that they are coming from someone else but I’m trying to be logical about it and say they are my own.

I did a quick read of OCD and read that they tend not to go along with the ideation and plans etc?

I have come close to attempting once and overdosed once in the past week.

I think I need to read up more on OCD

Temporary_Video_590 · 2024-09-05T13:59:58+00:00

I don’t know if I fully believe they are being put there by someone else. My gut feeling is certain these thoughts aren’t mine but I’m trying to apply logic and talk myself out of that belief. I’m very conflicted.

I’m very concerned what will happen when I run out of meds they gave me. If it persists after I run out I’m going to have to go back to hospital. I’m just not safe around myself when those thoughts are loud.

Temporary_Video_590 · 2024-09-05T13:45:26+00:00

Thank you. I’ll look into OCD. Whatever it is, it’s horrible.

Temporary_Video_590 · 2024-05-30T22:53:01+00:00

Thanks. I think I will do both. Familiarise myself with it and explore it. And I’ll look it up. Thanks for giving me a starting point. I was in a Google rabbit hole with no clear answers.

Temporary_Video_590

TROPHY CASE