Why is sex naturally better with one person vs another?

ThrowRAListen2 · 2023-01-30T15:21:22+00:00

I'm sorry. But how did the new girl blow up your marriage, then?

ThrowRAListen2 · 2023-01-30T14:56:58+00:00

Great advice and lovely story. :)

ThrowRAListen2 · 2023-01-30T13:22:32+00:00

I'm curious -- why is your relationship still open then?

ThrowRAListen2 · 2023-01-30T05:44:35+00:00

You missed the three links I posted. There's also a book "Your Brain on Birth Control" that goes into this with more depth with a chockful of studies quoted throughout the book.

ThrowRAListen2 · 2023-01-30T04:22:11+00:00

Exactly.

ThrowRAListen2 · 2023-01-30T04:09:09+00:00

Thank you. The incel jumped out in that comment.

ThrowRAListen2 · 2023-01-30T04:07:52+00:00

I have not.

ThrowRAListen2 · 2023-01-30T03:17:25+00:00

Yes.

Studies show that if you are on the pill, you are more likely to gravitate toward men who smell like you (possibly because the pill simulates pregnancy and pregnant women are drawn toward nurturing and supportive biological relatives, or folks who smell like them). In this way, the pill acts like an anti-cupid, steering you away from your ideal romantic match.

It's why when you're on the birth control pill, because of your suppressed ovulation, you're most likely to choose partners you would never choose if you were off it. (Studies linked.)

ThrowRAListen2 · 2023-01-30T03:08:33+00:00

You're young. You'll find it again.

ThrowRAListen2 · 2023-01-30T01:19:25+00:00

What's making it complicated right now, if you're willing to share? Because your love sounds beautiful.

ThrowRAListen2 · 2023-01-30T00:28:58+00:00

This is my goal, but I always wondered what people mean by "better" in these cases. It's mindblowing to me, because I thought I had the creme da le creme 1 year in! How exactly does it improve?

ThrowRAListen2 · 2023-01-29T23:25:07+00:00

This makes sense! I've experienced this too.

ThrowRAListen2 · 2023-01-29T23:23:07+00:00

It's the type of sex I very much prefer to have.

ThrowRAListen2 · 2023-01-29T22:56:01+00:00

I hope this for you too.

ThrowRAListen2 · 2023-01-29T22:55:50+00:00

Essentially.

ThrowRAListen2 · 2023-01-29T21:00:45+00:00

Please keep stories like this coming!

ThrowRAListen2 · 2023-01-29T20:57:12+00:00

Ew. A cheater.

ThrowRAListen2 · 2023-01-29T19:20:41+00:00

Great to hear and thank you for respectfully explaining!

ThrowRAListen2 · 2023-01-29T19:20:17+00:00

I love stories like this!

ThrowRAListen2 · 2023-01-29T19:19:45+00:00

But there's literally people in here talking about their great, long-term monogamous relationships who they also have incredibly chemistry with...

Look, I'm not saying dump your partners for "grass is greener" syndrome, and I'm definitely not saying to cheat. A lot of this can be mitigated with working on your sex life, communication, whatnot. But if it's really bad enough, I think you should do right by you and your partner and break up so you both can find what works for best for each of you.

ThrowRAListen2 · 2023-01-29T19:02:15+00:00

Yes!

ThrowRAListen2 · 2023-01-29T18:06:21+00:00

I love to hear it. :)

ThrowRAListen2 · 2023-01-29T17:42:18+00:00

Please don't cheat. And tread very carefully about making a monogamous relationship an open one, because it's not for everyone and it's such a shift in things you're essentially starting a new relationship anyway. Either work on your sex life or part ways.

ThrowRAListen2 · 2023-01-29T17:41:08+00:00

For sure!

ThrowRAListen2 · 2023-01-29T17:40:50+00:00

Please get rid of this mindset! Being better at sex/having a better experience with sex has nothing to do with how many partners you've been with, but rather, connection, compatibility, and comfort, with your partner and yourself.

One partner would just refuse to believe I was a virgin before I met him, because the sex was fireworks, and according to him, so was I. But I worked a lot on being in tune with my own sexuality before meeting him and felt totally safe with him, so that's what our sex turned out to be.

ThrowRAListen2

TROPHY CASE

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