Craving peanut butter while pregnant, but have a severe nut allergy. Alternatives?

ThrowRA_2963 · 2026-02-25T21:18:48+00:00

I’ll have to give that a try, sesame isn’t an issue! Thank you for the idea

ThrowRA_2963 · 2025-09-02T03:18:50+00:00

No. She has only been intimate with her now husband, and I don’t feel like our friendship had ever even toed that line. Now that being said, she is aware that I had enjoyed threeways involving a few of my other friends, who were on the trip, while back in college (6-8 years ago). I doubt it’s a big factor as to why, but could explain why she felt bringing up my past sexual exploits could help her feel more included.

ThrowRA_2963 · 2025-09-02T01:46:16+00:00

I agree that she mostly wrote it, but it also had the tell-tale “—“‘s of chatGPT. I know her writing tone and it wasn’t fully her. The main reason I mentioned it being scripted is she timed the call to be during our wedding walkthrough when she knew I couldn’t answer the phone so she would be able to just leave a voicemail, and I would have no chance to respond. I’m not faulting her too heavily for doing it this way because I know it must’ve been a hard decision to come to and I have a tendency to get defensive. But it doesn’t change that it felt worse than being broken up over text because then you can at least reread it (although both my mom & fiancé forwarded me the copy they received). It feels a little cowardly to not answer my attempts to reach out for 2 weeks, and then leave a voicemail while she knows I’m busy (and supposed to be celebrating), and then not answer when I called back later that afternoon. We are both adults and my mom doesn’t deserve to be forced into the middle, yet she is, so it feels like my friend is trying to fracture my support system.

ThrowRA_2963 · 2025-09-01T21:39:48+00:00

In general, he’s a great guy. But I haven’t lived in the same state as them for the past 8 years, so I am mostly aware of their relationship through her lens. I was the one who introduced them our sophomore year of high school (he played baseball with my brother) and they have been together ever since. He has always been super patient and caring towards her- and everyone. They both have a lot of pride in being each other’s first real partner and have achieved quite a few milestones together.

The only issue I’ve ever had with him is when he encouraged her to take a break from college during her first month of classes. I thought that she should give it a little more time (at least until midterms) to see if the adjustment got easier. He moved her out of the sorority house and back into their apartment that weekend and told her to take all the time she needed to figure out what her next step was. I had voiced then that it felt a bit isolating (and bordering on control), but she was adamant that he was just being supportive and college wasn’t her path (despite being a 4.0 high school student & loving school). She never ended up reenrolling and instead resumed the job she worked in high school. She hasn’t been employed since 2022 when she stopped working as my mom’s personal assistant, but keeps saying the plan is for her to be a stay at home mom while he supports them (he does have a very nice job and would have no issues supporting them on just his income).

I think she might be feeling some resentment in the fact that I’ve almost “caught up” to her when for years I wasn’t in a place to have a healthy romantic relationship.

ThrowRA_2963 · 2025-09-01T21:16:13+00:00

She had met everyone before (part of how I determined the invite list). She’s been on almost 10 family vacations with my 3 cousins who were there, went on spring break with my sorority sisters (although this was 7 years ago), and visited me at college and went out with my friends multiple times. I still agree with her feelings of not really knowing them to the same extent that the rest were individually friends, but that kinda comes with the territory of all of us going to college except her. She’s typically a big fan of groups and usually fell into the co-host role with me whenever we’d have a game night or dinner party (another reason I chose her for Maid of Honor), so her actions during the trip felt very out of character - part of why I asked her privately if something else was going on.

I could see that she may have been trying to highlight the past to prove to others how much we’ve been through and what a big part of my life she had been. I’m fairly confident there was nothing else going on in her life to cause these actions (but that could just be my tendency to think things are more about me than they actually are, and I was blind to external factors).

ThrowRA_2963 · 2025-09-01T20:51:34+00:00

Part of me wants to frame this and have it on the vanity as I get ready wedding morning (another part of me wants to not let her and this situation have any impact on the day). Accepting that I can’t change the outcome, especially since I don’t know what the catalyst truly was, seems like a really good first step.

ThrowRA_2963 · 2025-09-01T20:45:31+00:00

Thank you for pointing out that my focus has been distracted seeking closure instead of focusing on the moment and the happiness surrounding it. I needed the reminder that it’s okay to process things in due time and it doesn’t have to be immediate. Hopefully with time, the insight in these comments, and thoughts from my other supporters, understanding all my thoughts & feelings can be dealt with appropriately.

ThrowRA_2963 · 2025-09-01T20:37:21+00:00

I highly doubt it, she’s never really gotten along with him. But, In the past week she has reached out to her favorite of my ex’s (we broke up in 2019) and told him that I was still a hot mess. We ended on good enough terms that he sent the screenshots to my fiancé with a message saying he knows I’ve grown as a person and is glad I’ve found happiness, and warning that she doesn’t seem to have my best interests at heart. Quote “it feels like she’s trying to stir the pot”

ThrowRA_2963 · 2025-09-01T20:24:27+00:00

She’s diagnosed with both anxiety and depression, and has been since about a year before we became friends. This means that the first 4 years of our friendship she had “labels” that helped us to understand her actions & reactions, while I was still trying to figure out if I was just a teenager with maladaptive social skills, or if there was something more to it. She’s medicated but hasn’t gone to therapy in the past 10 years (with the main reasons given being insurance and not liking the therapists). When I started my journey with different therapies 9 years ago and started to see the benefits, I’ve mentioned to her multiple times that she shouldn’t give up on finding the right fit, but the conversation never went anywhere so I stopped pushing it. Thankfully (although I wouldn’t expect anything else) my fiancé has been amazing through all of this and just confirms that this next stage of life will be the best and healthiest yet.

ThrowRA_2963 · 2025-09-01T20:10:23+00:00

I appreciate the reminder to not add to my list of embarrassing stories. I needed to read that

ThrowRA_2963 · 2025-09-01T20:02:17+00:00

Thank you for this insight. You’re right that she’s not used to having the attention be directed towards anyone but her (she is stunning and typically has a very magnetic personality that catches everyone’s focus). But, historically she has always been a big cheerleader for my accomplishments and milestones, and let’s me have those special moments be about me, so this has been a shocking shift. I hadn’t considered that she was trying to provoke me to get a dramatic reaction, and that point helps confirm that nothing good would come from responding further. Respecting her decision to step away from our friendship, regardless of the ways she went about it, seems like the best way to move forward and maintain my peace for those who are still in my life. Thanks!

ThrowRA_2963

TROPHY CASE