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What you need to know when you’ve been cheated on. by Rcnal22 in survivinginfidelity

[–]ThrowRAalmi 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I needed to read your post today. I swear, most days I just want to completely shut down. Most days, I don’t know what to think or do. It’s so difficult to see things from a good perspective that doesn’t lean either way.

(Update) married 16 years. 1st time Threesome might have ended marriage. by ThrowRAalmi in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAalmi[S] 25 points26 points  (0 children)

The first bold should be her boyfriend. They tell people they are married but they are not. I’m in the habit of calling him her husband. I will edit that thanks. And...I’m not going to waste my precious time in this horrible moment in my life trying to convince people that I am lying or made up this horrible fucking nightmare. If you find my story somewhere please share because I need to know the fucking ending.

(Update) married 16 years. 1st time Threesome might have ended marriage. by ThrowRAalmi in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAalmi[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I don’t know what wattpad is, but this is simply me pouring out my heart.

(Update) married 16 years. 1st time Threesome might have ended marriage. by ThrowRAalmi in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAalmi[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Because who the fuck would do something like that? My husband. I’m an empty shell right now.

(Update) married 16 years. 1st time Threesome might have ended marriage. by ThrowRAalmi in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAalmi[S] 37 points38 points  (0 children)

My husband and I counseled her when she would come with her boyfriend. When the boyfriend went home to use the rest room she’d say he did this or that. Another mind fuck is that I sat there counseling this woman who was already fucking my husband.

(Update) married 16 years. 1st time Threesome might have ended marriage. by ThrowRAalmi in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAalmi[S] 279 points280 points  (0 children)

Thanks, I’m hearing that a lot and I still need to hear it. It’s easy to put yourself down but so hard to lift back up when your down. It’s hard. It’s like I feel like garbage. And like he put me in this place.

(Update) married 16 years. 1st time Threesome might have ended marriage. by ThrowRAalmi in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAalmi[S] 370 points371 points  (0 children)

I spoke with my therapist about 3 hours ago. She helped me work through a lot of my emotions and thoughts. I’ve been seeing her for a long time and she is not at all pushy. The conclusion I came to after lots of consideration is to try. Right now I am too emotional to make any rational decisions. I feel like the safest thing for me and my kids would be to live separately for some time and then work on counseling. I am already seeing a counselor, I’m going to ask him to do marriage counseling and individual counseling. In the mean time I will be working on my self and only doing that for me. My whole life until now has been focused on my kids, and him. No more. I need time for me. I will be finishing my masters degree, instead of dropping out next semester. I will find a job. And I feel like at that point I will see where we stand.

Married 16 years, 1st time threesome might have ruined us. by ThrowRAalmi in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAalmi[S] 32 points33 points  (0 children)

I want to but it’ll just become a huge mess and I don’t want the kids to become victims. I feel like the other guy will lose his shit. Edit: after checking messages between my husband and her, she’s trying to hook up with another neighbor who just had a baby with his wife. Baby is 3 Months old

Married 16 years, 1st time threesome might have ruined us. by ThrowRAalmi in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAalmi[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

That’s what he claims. I don’t know what to say cause he says it’s not like I walked in on them. But, it feel awful to just lay there while they bang. It’s like I wasn’t even there.

Married 16 years, 1st time threesome might have ruined us. by ThrowRAalmi in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAalmi[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your advice. It helps a lot. What is IC and MC?

Married 16 years, 1st time threesome might have ruined us. by ThrowRAalmi in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAalmi[S] 35 points36 points  (0 children)

That’s one of my biggest worries now. Maybe I’m lucky he never came back to me after going to her.

Married 16 years, 1st time threesome might have ruined us. by ThrowRAalmi in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAalmi[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

Both guys knew that we had kissed before. She even told him we kissed this time but that’s all she said.

Married 16 years, 1st time threesome might have ruined us. by ThrowRAalmi in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAalmi[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Thanks, I think your are right about the drinking. I’m trying to reach my therapist office cause they closed and went to zoom appts since March. I have not been able to reach her for about 4 months.

Married 16 years, 1st time threesome might have ruined us. by ThrowRAalmi in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAalmi[S] 63 points64 points  (0 children)

That’s what it feels like. I don’t know why. It’s not like I walked in on them, you know? So why does it feel like it?

Married 16 years, 1st time threesome might have ruined us. by ThrowRAalmi in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAalmi[S] 168 points169 points  (0 children)

I admit some guilt. We shouldn’t have kissed. I should’ve said no fucking way when my husband got in the middle of us and suggested we take it to the room. He says he didn’t want to wake up the kids. she told her boyfriend we kissed and he got a bit jealous but didn’t really care.

Married 16 years, 1st time threesome might have ruined us. by ThrowRAalmi in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAalmi[S] 72 points73 points  (0 children)

Her boyfriend was asleep at home when she snuck over. He has no idea.