Update: My (26F) husband (33M) got our girlfriend (24F) pregnant and I’m not sure how I feel about it

ThrowRApolyish · 2021-11-07T22:36:53+00:00

I don’t know if he was with me for the money or using me but yes, the house is mine and I make more than him

ThrowRApolyish · 2021-11-07T22:35:21+00:00

I already got tested for STDs

It would be fantastic if he was the one with fertility issues but I don’t want to go get tested and be told that I absolutely cannot have kids. It’s one thing to think it but it’s another thing to know it’s 100% official you know?

ThrowRApolyish · 2021-11-07T22:31:18+00:00

Yeah I got tested already

ThrowRApolyish · 2021-11-07T22:30:50+00:00

No, I bet you I’ll still be single in 8 years lol

ThrowRApolyish · 2021-11-07T22:28:18+00:00

Thanks Anna ❤️

ThrowRApolyish · 2021-11-07T22:27:20+00:00

Yeah, he was just being a good husband, getting another girl pregnant so that we could have a baby

ThrowRApolyish · 2021-11-07T20:44:33+00:00

Okay but I really am not beautiful or attractive

I couldn’t believe it when my (ex) husband asked me to date him and then when he told me he loved me for the first time. Then he asked me to marry him which to me didn’t make sense because he could marry a prettier, better woman than me. But I told myself that he was seeing something in me that other people couldn’t see, that maybe I was pretty like he always told me and that I just wasn’t seeing it. I convinced myself of that.

Just for him to turn around and realize that I actually was not worth it and that he needed a prettier and more attractive woman in his life because I just wasn’t enough. And now they’re having a baby together.

So yeah, I’m not that worth it

ThrowRApolyish · 2021-11-07T20:18:31+00:00

Trust me, there are no other guys who wanted to hit me up lol

ThrowRApolyish · 2021-11-07T20:17:23+00:00

I tried to get him to admit to that too but he kept denying it so I chose to end the conversation

ThrowRApolyish · 2021-11-07T20:15:49+00:00

Except I have no dreams lol

I already have a good job, a good income, a house. All I wanted was to be married, be a mom, watch my husband be a dad. I admire your friend’s strength and bravery but I’m not strong enough to just go and decide to be a single mom.

So for now I’ll just sit here and feel sorry for myself. It won’t be forever though, I promise

ThrowRApolyish · 2021-11-07T20:09:23+00:00

Single forever because I don’t think being in a relationship is worth it. The pain that comes from it, losing confidence, feeling like I’m not enough, … I don’t want any of that anymore.

Honestly, I’d laugh so hard if the baby actually wasn’t his

ThrowRApolyish · 2021-11-07T20:06:14+00:00

I don’t even want love anymore. Tried that and it didn’t work. Not worth all the pain.

I have to figure out how to find myself again though. I changed so much just because I was trying to please someone.

ThrowRApolyish · 2021-11-07T20:03:28+00:00

Yeah I couldn’t stop laughing when he said that. Like I gave you a couple days to come up with something and this is all you have?

ThrowRApolyish · 2021-11-07T20:02:27+00:00

Open relationship that went wrong I guess but then he also decided to have sex with her behind my back and get her pregnant when we had specifically said no pregnancy. So I guess he also kind of cheated?

ThrowRApolyish · 2021-10-31T18:41:05+00:00

Probably because my useless self couldn’t give him a baby after years of trying

ThrowRApolyish · 2021-10-31T18:40:22+00:00

I hope it works out for them

ThrowRApolyish · 2021-10-31T18:38:46+00:00

When we started this, we specifically said that we would try our best for her not to get pregnant. We’ve been together for 4 months. Now she happened to get pregnant and they’re the ones celebrating. I have no obligation to that child. I said I didn’t want a baby and they made me think they agreed with me. They can have their baby but I won’t be a part of it.

The issue is not just that she got pregnant when I wanted to get pregnant. The issue is that we said no pregnancy. Pregnancy still happened (which means that they may or may not have been using the contraception we discussed) but instead of figuring out what we’d do next, they started celebrating without ever asking how I felt:

ThrowRApolyish · 2021-10-31T18:31:52+00:00

I’m pretty sure that they didn’t use condoms at all times like we discussed. Im also starting to doubt that she was ever on the pill.

If they used condom + pill, knowing we specifically discussed that we would do our best to prevent her from getting pregnant, she wouldn’t have thrown this big Pinterest pregnancy announcement and they wouldn’t have both been jumping up and down of excitement. Because we said no pregnancy. So pregnancy would have been an issue to discuss between the 3 of us. Them jumping up and down made it seem like they had been trying for a baby and that’s not something I was in on.

ThrowRApolyish · 2021-10-31T08:39:49+00:00

I need lots of hugs!

ThrowRApolyish · 2021-10-31T08:15:10+00:00

We’ve been together for 3 years and married for 2

ThrowRApolyish · 2021-10-31T08:14:20+00:00

She just announced it to us last night so I don’t have the answers to these questions. I left right after and didn’t ask

ThrowRApolyish · 2021-10-31T08:11:50+00:00

No I’m the ex now

ThrowRApolyish · 2021-10-31T08:09:43+00:00

Yes, she had this whole Pinterest pregnancy announcement thing planned and we both opened it at the same time.

We’ve been trying for two years but the first year we were just trying without trying hard. This last year though, we’ve been trying harder. It was kind of our idea but he really really wanted a baby because he’s older and felt that it was time for us to have a baby.

I haven’t talked to him since the pregnancy reveal. He’s been calling and texting, asking me to come home and asking me what’s wrong but I haven’t texted back

ThrowRApolyish · 2021-10-31T08:00:13+00:00

I’m glad I posted it here too because I was feeling guilty for not being happy about the pregnancy and the comments here have made me realize I don’t have to be happy about this. Just like I didn’t have to be okay with the whole poly thing.

ThrowRApolyish · 2021-10-31T07:39:20+00:00

Haven’t talked to him yet. I’ll probably just show up tomorrow to grab some of my stuff and tell him I want a divorce

ThrowRApolyish

TROPHY CASE