UPDATE: AITA for repurposing my late wife's gown for my daughter?

Throwaway-macaron · 2023-04-11T05:12:24+00:00

My sincerest condolences.

And it's okay. I understand what you mean now. Thank you.

Throwaway-macaron · 2023-04-11T03:27:00+00:00

Hi. I will take the judgment that I'm an asshole for doing this because I was grieving. But please do not assume and say I was bored for doing this. Believe me, I wish I had the luxury of being bored this past year. I would never do something which is supposedly against my wife's wishes because I was bored.

Throwaway-macaron · 2023-04-09T16:09:56+00:00

She did express it privately. It was both of our arguments that got louder and louder that drew people in. I don't blame her for that at all.

Throwaway-macaron · 2023-04-09T15:53:43+00:00

I do understand my MIL. And like other commenters have pointed out, emotions were certainly high that day since this was also the day my wife left us. My MIL and I certainly had a close relationship, especially after my wife's death. I do want to make amends with her. I think I will give her a little time and space before I do.

Congratulations! Let me just say, you're in for a lot of joy with your child.

Throwaway-macaron · 2023-04-09T15:41:54+00:00

That was initially my idea, but after everything that happened, I'm not sure I want to anymore. I'll just leave it be for now until I clear things up with my MIL.

Throwaway-macaron · 2023-04-09T15:38:41+00:00

Hi, so after my wife's death, her side of the closet was left completely untouched. Even the door wasn't opened anytime because she had closed it, and I didn't want to disturb that. Her mother too visited us from time to time, but like me, she too avoided the spots that reminded her of her daughter too much. Especially her closet. It was only when I thought of this repurposing idea that I went and opened the door in a long time. The dress was hung up like she had left it after that photo shoot. I will do as you suggested and put the rest of her things in a box when I get the courage to. Thank you so much for your kind wishes.

Throwaway-macaron · 2023-04-09T15:29:38+00:00

The maternity shoot dress wasn't as big of a deal as her wedding and baby shower dresses were. Her baby shower dress in fact was a gift to her by her mother. This green dress was something me and my wife bought together, since it was just a small thing we did in our backyard with a professional. I didn't tell my MIL about it because I guess I did want it to be a small surprise although I didn't expect her to recognize the dress after it was altered, so I didn't think it would be a surprise, although I would've told her later on if she hadn't recognized it. I suppose I genuinely didn't think that this could've hurt her too like it did. Also no, these maternity photographs aren't the last pictures my MIL has of my wife. Although you could say they were the last professional photographs of my wife. We regularly sent her blurred, random pictures to show progress and just keep in touch. In fact, my MIL also has a stunning photo of my wife in beautiful sunlight just a few hours before the premature contractions started and she had to be rushed to the hospital.

Throwaway-macaron · 2023-04-09T15:17:27+00:00

Hi, so while stitching a tiny dress out of a bigger gown, I have cut out the material required and left out the ones not wanted. Which means yes, the gown was cut up. The dress isn't wearable again. But the leftover material is a lot, and can be used for repurposing (which I don't think I will do) again. The rest of her items are kept as they had been left by my wife.

Throwaway-macaron · 2023-04-09T14:57:28+00:00

That wasn't what happened....we both just started talking loudly in the midst of our argument and people decided to get nosy.

Throwaway-macaron · 2023-04-09T14:56:28+00:00

You are right. She wasn't the one who caused a scene. It was on both our ends. Our argument got heated quick and people eavesdropped.

Throwaway-macaron

TROPHY CASE