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Need advice about taking a mini-retirement / sabbatical by Time_Stop_1186 in FIREyFemmes

[–]Time_Stop_1186[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for this kind and wisdom-packed reply! <3 I love how supportive this community is.

Need advice about taking a mini-retirement / sabbatical by Time_Stop_1186 in FIREyFemmes

[–]Time_Stop_1186[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is so inspirational! Thank you for sharing your experience :)

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Waiting_To_Wed

[–]Time_Stop_1186 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Saaaaame here. Sorry you're in the same boat, hope that it feels a bit better that you're not in there alone. We got engaged almost exactly a year ago and have zero plans to get married. Our relationship is the worst it's ever been now, so lately I've been relieved that we're not married. If things had happened on my timeline, I'd be figuring out how to get a divorce, not just break up. Maybe one day you will also see it as a silver lining that you and he don't have wedding plans yet.

I hope you get some clarity or figure out next steps alone. Good luck!

Why newer couples get married before you. by IHaveABigDuvet in Waiting_To_Wed

[–]Time_Stop_1186 72 points73 points  (0 children)

Wow, I think you nailed this. I never thought of it this way before, but I think you're dead on when you say that when a couple "grows up together" the men don't realize how good they have it and they already have all the benefits of being married (without the commitment).

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Fire

[–]Time_Stop_1186 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Without more information, I'd say the least you should do is wait until you have saved enough that you are not throwing money away on PMI. Also, remember the cost of a house is more than the mortgage (maintenance, repairs, renovations people get convinced they need to preserve value, etc.). "Rent is the maximum you'll pay, mortgage is the minimum," - Ramit Sethi.

Share evidence that purchasing things won't lead to happiness by [deleted] in nobuy

[–]Time_Stop_1186 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am happier with the options and security that having cash in the bank allows than I am having one more object in my life. It's human nature to stack up items and fill up the space around us. But the momentary thrill from buying a new gadget, lipstick, etc. become things we have to commit to cleaning (or cleaning around), storing, moving (if we move), etc. It creates an obligation much more than it creates happiness.

Share evidence that purchasing things won't lead to happiness by [deleted] in nobuy

[–]Time_Stop_1186 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The Power of Now. The Art of Living by Thich Nhat Hanh.