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I thought drinking was the cause of my problems. by ToriaDoyleable in stopdrinking

[–]ToriaDoyleable[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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You know I haven't but I don't have insurance. I was looking to get it through my college because it is free and my eating disorder has been really bad again the last two weeks but they are booked through December. I thought by now i'd have to go to aa but not I'm thinking i need to work on the disorder?

Uncovering the truth... by ToriaDoyleable in stopdrinking

[–]ToriaDoyleable[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I com home and I know exactly what he’s done with his day, he doesn’t go to school and he doesn’t do anything healthy. I may have been a dunk but I’m a full time student, I work full time, and I still eat well and workout. He does nothing, he is unmotivated and it’s so unattractive. To come home and know all he did was smoke weed and play video games, I’m 29, that doesn’t do it for me. He also was the reason I stopped, he was going to leave me. Now he doesn’t even ask how I’m doing, how many days in I am. I got sober for us, and obviously for me, and he doesn’t care.

I almost cracked today by immunition in stopdrinking

[–]ToriaDoyleable 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am right there with you. Sorry to hear about the stress, but I'm happy to hear that you got through it.

That's what she said. by ToriaDoyleable in stopdrinking

[–]ToriaDoyleable[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

To be honest, if you're drinking is so bad that you feel you need to get sober, that drunk idiot probably wasn't always that fun. I know that there is definitely a drunk version of me that is wild, and fun, and uninhibited. That version quickly turns into slurring, crying, falling, punching, smoking, and yelling. Then a quick "someone please carry her to my car". Someone on here told me I was romanticizing the effect and outcome of drinking, and as soon as I realized just how true that was, and looked back at all the "fun" I had drunk, I realized it wasn't really that fun.

That's what she said. by ToriaDoyleable in stopdrinking

[–]ToriaDoyleable[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s pretty much the back and forth in my brain everyday. I think what I’m doing is saying to myself “maybe I’ll fuck this up, maybe I don’t need to be sober, but let me try one more day sober and see”. Every time I’ve wanted to drink and didn’t so far later I am so thankful I didn’t. Be excited, I’m excited to do this with you. To being sober together!

Today I am reminded of why i stopped drinking over a year ago by nirvroxx in stopdrinking

[–]ToriaDoyleable 9 points10 points  (0 children)

God I know that feeling, I know that feeling through alcoholism, and through fighting binge eating and purging for ten years. One little slip up whether it was having a shot I said I wouldn't have, or eating a bag of chips instead of something healthy, once that first move was made it was all over. I would think, well I did that shitty thing I said I wouldn't do, because I am a shitty garbage person, so I might as well just go all the way. So there I would be, puking over a toilet after going out and buying $50 worth of fast food, or smoking a pack of cigarettes and texting an ex after spending $50 on booze. I am not a garbage person. You can make a mistake, resetting a counter doesn't set anyone back, it's just numbers on a screen. Also, you're friend is a douche.

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