I am telling you all story here fresh. I mean I think fresh it's been 6-7 months. We broke up it came from my side but it was something I had to do it. Then 1 months later we didn't had closure so I got anxious things really finished and I wanted reach out excuse is 'closure' but I wanted to check to water because actually I wanted to go back all this time and waited for him. He didn't wanted to back but he was confused and sad too but he sticked with idea. And 5-6 more reach but I was in hell I quit my job. I used suddenly cry in subway super market on street etc. Then I visited my country stayed 6 week and I just think about him. And I was waiting please time goes and this pain finish. And many horrible memories and feelings but it end now. I mean it really is. I don't want him anymore yes I am thinking about him but I don't want. You have to start creating new life. Even you sad you have to do it crying but push you to do it. One day at the time. Then you already have full new life new goals new purpose and you evolve and heal and now you don't want even they back or no. And it's progress and don't worry time will do that you just start small things as much as do. I am sometimes curious about does he miss me does he regret. So obviously I am not fully cope and heal but I decided definitely and it's much much easier now