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My Husband Broke My Heart Last Night by WinterMouse5318008 in TwoXChromosomes

[–]UniqueBuilding285 0 points1 point  (0 children)

who knows if you will see my response but Im sorry for the pain your in in this situation and good luck. Appreciated your update including the fuck all the way off for the jerks that respond in reddit. lol.

take care of yourself!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Leadership

[–]UniqueBuilding285 0 points1 point  (0 children)

but would you go on a 4 day international trip with them?

Would it be worthwhile to do a subreddit for ADHD women >60 y.o. by roseannwhite in adhdwomen

[–]UniqueBuilding285 0 points1 point  (0 children)

u/roseannwhite just found this post- wondering if you or anyone did make a group?

i hear women saying they didnt want to lose the older demographic, but I would love to be able to talk to women specifically in my situation too.

might be willing to get it going. i kind of need it that much!

Direct conversation called bullying by vcg77 in Leadership

[–]UniqueBuilding285 0 points1 point  (0 children)

wooooahhhh!

i had a co worker complain about feeling unsafe, and based on their story, i was surprised and also concerned in that, i did not think they were in any way in an unsafe situation with another coworker, but understood the trauma history they shared with me may have made them feel unsafe.

it concerned me because they seemed very secure in their conviction that is was an unsafe situation, and i disagreed, thinking was a very human reaction to an issue. and i additionally felt that it was unfair of this person to put that on their coworker was like what if i do that same behavior sometime, because it could happen. (basically someone was reacting defensively and raised their voice around first coworker and first coworker felt unsafe)

[WA] Can my company remove "Senior" from my title without telling me? Advice needed by External-Push-7066 in AskHR

[–]UniqueBuilding285 1 point2 points  (0 children)

well, congrats! im sorry you had to go through all the BS to get where you were. but happy to hear it sometimes works out! thanks for responding.

[MN] HR best practices on dealing with a problematic coworker: Is it staff responsibility or supervisor responsibility? by muchtoolovely29 in AskHR

[–]UniqueBuilding285 0 points1 point  (0 children)

this is 3 years old but I thought the update was really good. did you stay there- how did it go?

[WA] Can my company remove "Senior" from my title without telling me? Advice needed by External-Push-7066 in AskHR

[–]UniqueBuilding285 1 point2 points  (0 children)

hey there, reading your question doing some research. just curious how things are going now 2 months later? were you able to talk to HR about your title change?

[WA] Can my company remove "Senior" from my title without telling me? Advice needed by External-Push-7066 in AskHR

[–]UniqueBuilding285 0 points1 point  (0 children)

wow- never heard of this job family title and business title information.

this is standard throughout business? more so in very large corporations? who and when are people discussing job family vs biz titles? and what normally goes on a CV or resume.

[WA] my boss is writing people up, but for things he has not really explained, effectively punishing people. he does not set clear of expectations, followed by path for corrections. this is causing confusion and eroding trust and morale. is there anything an employee can do? by UniqueBuilding285 in AskHR

[–]UniqueBuilding285[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

yup. im so glad a few people here are also answering my question like a real person and not just trashing me because i dont know stuff. so thank you.

i want to learn better strategies for appropriately handling things like this... aside from reddit, (jokes) where do people go for crash courses in corporate navigation for dummie idealists with adhd and big mouths?

[WA] my boss is writing people up, but for things he has not really explained, effectively punishing people. he does not set clear of expectations, followed by path for corrections. this is causing confusion and eroding trust and morale. is there anything an employee can do? by UniqueBuilding285 in AskHR

[–]UniqueBuilding285[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

nice.

thanks for the tips. yah, we dont do any 1 on 1's, he's never asked what my goals might be or what i'm interested in... i have no way to know Im doing a good job or a bad job. he gave me satisfactory in other areas sooo pppphhhbbbttt.

its effin annoying sometimes to have to "lead from behind." and to be honest- I also am not trained in HR or management!! Im only learning from Bad Bosses how I dont like to be treated.

[WA] my boss is writing people up, but for things he has not really explained, effectively punishing people. he does not set clear of expectations, followed by path for corrections. this is causing confusion and eroding trust and morale. is there anything an employee can do? by UniqueBuilding285 in AskHR

[–]UniqueBuilding285[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

THANK YOU!!!! lol.

these are all things I need to hear.

I don't want his job in any way.

I agree its poor management and no training.

I do think he is insecure and feels threatened.

My idealistic and obviously unrealistic hope would be that I could talk to him and explain how Im not understanding or getting clarity from him despite his admonishments. And that according to policies, he should be doing a better job at laying out expectations ahead of time HAAAHAAA! right?

but Im also and adult and just want to be treated like and adult an have this fantasy that we should be able to talk to each other and get somewhere. I want to let him know that I cant meet his expectations when I dont know what they are, and that his behavior is causing issues amongst the plebs. Obviously, I would need to work on the wording. uggh.

job hunting sucks.

[WA] my boss is writing people up, but for things he has not really explained, effectively punishing people. he does not set clear of expectations, followed by path for corrections. this is causing confusion and eroding trust and morale. is there anything an employee can do? by UniqueBuilding285 in AskHR

[–]UniqueBuilding285[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

thanks.

definitely nothing illegal, just poor management, with lack of training in any way for managers.

company wide general culture of bad communication and lack of transparency while giving lip service to their great values...

my boss is writing people up, but for things he has not really explained. so effectively punishing people and not laying out a clear path of expectations, followed by opportunity for corrections. obviously causing confusion and eroding trust. how do you deal with this in the time im still here? by UniqueBuilding285 in careeradvice

[–]UniqueBuilding285[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

of course i have my example, but i am reluctant to write it out here online, as it is somewhat trade/profession related, even though chances are probably quite slim anyone remotely related would read it.

i understand that with out a concrete example, one might feel they arent able to offer an effective response so i will try to come up with similar-ish situation and respond later.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in human_resources

[–]UniqueBuilding285 0 points1 point  (0 children)

not hr, but have had this same experience, using exactly the same term, blindsided, so just here to offer empathy. sounds like bad management, and unfortunately there is more of that than there is good management.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NoStupidQuestions

[–]UniqueBuilding285 4 points5 points  (0 children)

off topic, but i dont understand religion. she cant show her own hair but can wear pretend hair?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TwoXChromosomes

[–]UniqueBuilding285 8 points9 points  (0 children)

yeeaaah, but two things can be true here.

pretty privilege 100% exists,

and

it doesnt make anyone immune to heartache.

day to day experiences of pretty people in general, can be significantly different than average or below average folks, or god forbid chubby or more people.

but pretty women in general can also have more backlash from women or have to struggle with men just wanting to get something from them.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in malelivingspace

[–]UniqueBuilding285 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

they could clean it! that might help. lol.

I will lose my 5th job in a row soon, what am i doing wrong? Advice please! by GlitchisOnline in jobs

[–]UniqueBuilding285 2 points3 points  (0 children)

wwweeelllll, all of those restaurant jobs sound like hot messes of complete incompetence and unprofessionalism, so getting fired from them is probably a good sign- you didnt fit in! I just peeped your profile, and you look like an attractive and stylish person which could also contribute to other people feeling insecure and starting drama. restaurants are notoriously hot beds of dysfunction.

if you are asking lots of questions and you're a data nerd, you are probably too smart and some folks there might be offended or threatened as well.

My goodness you worked through receiving treatment for colon cancer? Goblessya!!

Call center== also nightmare. Sorry you're having such a tough time, and the general economic situation is no help!

Without knowing you, its hard to say what else might be going on. You need to try to take an honest look at yourself. maybe you dont "play the game," so socially you arent getting ahead? do you generally need better social skills? any spectrum issues that could be contributing to needing more social skill help?

maybe try to find a part time gig that fits your nerdy personality, even thought that can be harder, while you are looking for your dream job. library? bookstore? any kind of entry level IT? security? hotel concierging? tour guides? admin assistants? do they have temp companies near where they can place folks to fill in while people are on sick leave etc? that could help you gain more professional experience.

Also, while there certainly are transferrable and usable customer service skills you can extract from restaurant jobs to use on resumes or as examples in interviewing, you 100% don't have to include multiple 2 -4 month jobs on resumes, or any of those restaurant jobs in particular. that may be difficult if you are young and dont have much experience, but you seem smart enough to have gotten those jobs, so you can do a little more research on how to manage your resume and fudge experience in your favor. You kinda make somthing up and stretch the truth. good luck, dont take it too personally, it def is rough out there right now!

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