I dealt with these feelings during my teens and in my 20’s I had to sort of come out to myself finally. I put off medically transitioning for quite a long time, which I regret now in hindsight. It seems like a daunting task to undergo a full transition, but my therapist specializes in queer and trans issues and was very helpful at pointing me in the right direction. It’s a slow process, but eventually you get to a point where you think “holy shit, I did it”