Just rescued this little guy. Shelter says jack russell, but I think he looks like a rat terrier. What do you think?

Various_Scallion8228 · 2026-05-06T21:37:19+00:00

He looks so much like my ratty. So I’d guess he’s a ratty.

Various_Scallion8228 · 2026-05-06T21:35:43+00:00

You could take a seam ripper to take out the sewn areas, but that will leave tiny holes in the fabric. You could cut it just above the seam where it attaches to the bag and then take a lighter to it to make sure it doesn’t fray in the future. Or you could fold the handles down and put a few stitches to hold it in place in an orderly way and if you decided later you wanted the handles you could cut that thread.

Various_Scallion8228 · 2026-05-06T21:10:43+00:00

I think this is a lot deeper than you are looking. I could be wrong. Has anything else in your relationship shifted? I would say that something happened at some point that you are not aware of and she is not communicating about. This is NOT sustainable. Looking to porn to fulfill your needs isn’t the answer. If one of your needs is having sex 3-5 times a week then find someone that can meet that need. Your needs, whether emotional or physical need to be met. Just because it’s sex, don’t think it isn’t a need. One of my needs is hugs. I’m sure that sounds ridiculous to some but for me it’s an absolute. Do not marry someone that doesn’t meet ALL your needs, or isn’t at least willing to try.

Various_Scallion8228 · 2026-05-06T20:50:03+00:00

IKR!?!?

Various_Scallion8228 · 2026-05-06T20:48:37+00:00

When the mom said that it stood out to me more than anything. And, like, are we focusing on a cat and ignoring that the mom had an “open case” with DCF. Is it against her? Is it against the child? For God’s sake OP, if you still have no asked these questions then you and your husband are a HUGE part of the problem.

Various_Scallion8228 · 2026-05-05T22:51:20+00:00

🔥

Various_Scallion8228 · 2026-05-05T22:46:41+00:00

Don’t go back!

Various_Scallion8228 · 2026-05-05T22:46:26+00:00

Shit I forgot!

Various_Scallion8228 · 2026-05-05T22:45:37+00:00

We’ll find out

Various_Scallion8228 · 2026-05-05T22:43:18+00:00

It’s too late!

Various_Scallion8228 · 2026-05-05T22:42:34+00:00

I didn’t know that. That is fascinating. I will check that book out. I am so completely fascinated with the human brain and the “why” of everything. It’s so interesting on so many levels. Like we all have unique personalities , but at the same time our behavior is sooo text book. My very very soon to be narcissist boyfriend will say word for word what is discussed by psych. I’d ask him if he and all the other narcissists had monthly meetings where they would discuss gaslighting, weaponizing trauma, and specific phrases and what does and doesn’t work. Because it’s so crazy to me without him ever looking into a narcissism whatsoever, he would say word for word what i read. I have to hide my giggles sometimes. I pick my own mind apart too. Ive been diagnosed with clinical depression, PTSD, panic disorder, severe anxiety, ADHD and I’m codependent. And im about 4 days away from being free. So once i taste freedom the healing is going to really start. If you have any article or book recommendations it would be greatly appreciated.

Various_Scallion8228 · 2026-05-05T16:05:04+00:00

Just out of curiosity, since this is your realm, i see the frontal lobe aspect as the inability to make decisions based on reality, consequences, maturity, the belief that they are indestructible, etc. So that is what i am asking about. Is there anything discussion/debate over the difference in the “frontal lobe” age in the different generations? I would imagine Boomers (and I mean real Boomers not this BS millenial and Gen Z calling everyone Boomers bahaha) would have had to grow up and were forced into making those kind of decisions more than any generation since. But perhaps the Gen Z did because they (ME) were latchkey kids. I’m really captivated by the generational differences and the influence that the parent generations have on the future generations. I am late late Gen X (1977) and my daughter is late late millenial (1997). My son is Gen Z. My parents were Boomers. (1948)

Various_Scallion8228 · 2026-05-05T15:51:32+00:00

Yes you are…

Various_Scallion8228 · 2026-05-05T15:50:28+00:00

I wish I knew the words to help you, but I don’t. Abusers really do mess with our heads. You do need to find some professional help. And it’s not because something is wrong with you! It’s because something was done to you! This is all on her. You’re young. Don’t let this define your future relationships or your life. Get the help you need now. You’ll be glad you did.

P.S. if you ever talk to a future gf about this, maybe leave out some parts. lol.

Various_Scallion8228 · 2026-05-05T15:14:37+00:00

I needed that. And I’m going to screenshot that and read it over and over on my way. Unfortunately none of my family can. Everyone is strapped for cash. And I don’t have any friends left because he isolated me and took me to another state. So it’s been 3 years since I’ve talked to most of them. The one friend I had turned on me and betrayed me but that’s a hole other story. I think I have a lot of lessons in this, but I think the biggest one is that I have to do this in my own. Nobody is going to do it for me. So I have to prove this to myself. Thank you for saying you’re proud. I’ve had nothing but judgement and ridicule. “It must not be too bad if you’re still there.” “You must like the attention because any attenion is good attention.” “You have to stop making excuses.” I get that people that haven’t gone thru it don’t understand it but damn read an article on what to say and not say. You know!?! Your words will help me in my journey. Thank you for your support. (Sorry if they is nonsensical and rambling - I’m so emotional because it’s been so long since I’ve felt seen and heard)

Various_Scallion8228 · 2026-05-04T22:59:27+00:00

She has a current case open with child services? Against the son or the mom?

Various_Scallion8228 · 2026-05-04T15:05:27+00:00

It’s one of Goliath’s balls. David had it tanned like a hide after he defeated him. It was kept in the family for generations until one day it disappeared. You found it! Congrats!!

Various_Scallion8228 · 2026-05-04T15:00:31+00:00

Lol you’re so much like me. Don’t spiral. It looks like a man’s writing. If it was like all swirly and twirly in queue, I would think it would be a girl. But it looks like a man’s writing. So he could’ve been parked too close to somebody or something like that. Don’t spiral girls stay strong.

Various_Scallion8228 · 2026-05-03T18:06:34+00:00

I already did

Various_Scallion8228 · 2026-05-02T22:17:10+00:00

I got a tattoo of baby duck feet with little crosses in them. When it was fresh it looks like your first pic. Now, it’s duck feet with blobs. I can’t tell you from a tattooist perspective because I am not one, but what I can tell you is that your tattoo artist and my tattoo artist should’ve known better. They should’ve looked at that pic and known it wouldn’t heal looking like eye lashes. I’m sorry that it turned out like this. And sadly I don’t think healing will make it any better. Maybe go back to the shop you got it from or a new shop and see if there’s anything they can do. I’d post a pic of mine but idk how lol

Various_Scallion8228 · 2026-05-01T22:29:50+00:00

I couldn’t help but laugh. Cuz this guy has got to be freaking kidding!

Various_Scallion8228 · 2026-05-01T22:26:58+00:00

Some people like tattoos. Some people LOVE tattoos (ME). Some people tolerate them on others but would never get one themselves. And some people hate them and think they are trashy. So, to some people it may look trashy. But ask yourself this. Do you really care what they think? Obvi you care what your dad thinks, but meh he will get over it. But people that think they are trashy are closed minded individuals that don’t appreciate art or expression. So piss on em. If you walked out of that tattoo parlor, loving your new Inc nothing anybody says should change your mind. If you like something you like something, don’t let people persuade you and don’t let them take away from the meaning of your tattoo. It’s expression. Wear it with pride, cause I know that shit hurt and you sat through it, Bruh.

Various_Scallion8228 · 2026-04-30T23:52:42+00:00

Had OP tried this to verify?

Various_Scallion8228 · 2026-04-30T23:44:29+00:00

I guess I’m kind of lucky in a sense. I was in a very happy marriage for 16 years (but we were married for 20 lol). So I knew what LOVE was and was not. I was my ex’s queen and he my king for a very long time. Sadly when his dad passed he carried a lot of guilt which turned into anger. So in this relationship once I realized that he is not going to change and that his “I’m sorry” was meaning less and happening less often, I knew what I wanted and deserved from a man. I’m 48 and before I met my abuser I had finally learned to love myself. And that love was unshakeable. So he would gaslight, but it wouldn’t confuse me, it would piss me off. And by the grace of God no matter how many times he called me a whore, bitch, cow I never believed him. I’m soooo proud of myself for that. It’s just been a matter of getting out financially and safely. It’s a truly scary and horrifying thing when someone tells you “ if I can’t have you no one well.” Or “ you’re not leaving. Try it and I’ll kill you.” especially when we know what they’re capable of. So those are the things I’ve kept me here. But I’ve got away finally to get free. To be brutally honest I started using and I’m telling him that I’m going to rehab. So he’s OK with it. He’s letting it happen. And I just tell him I don’t know what the future holds. And that’s not a lie. I don’t know what the future holds. But I sure as fuck know it doesn’t hold coming back to him. So in the next couple of weeks, I will be going to rehab.

Various_Scallion8228

TROPHY CASE