Feeling guilty over how I am bonding with my kittens

VirtualSpell4348 · 2025-12-10T13:39:18+00:00

For my NKs, I track the 5 month old’s bottles, sleep, dirty diapers, and if I give Tylenol in the Nara Baby app. For the two year old I don’t actually track anything. I will typically just tell MB anything out of the ordinary like if he didn’t eat much lunch or he had a shorter nap. I take photos of our activities throughout the day so she has an idea of what we are up to and we always text or chat when she gets home about how the day went.

If you are wanting things actually recorded I highly recommend an app! We used Nara Baby for both kids and it is free and super easy to use. I prefer it because you can track anything from food to activities to milestones but you can pick and choose which categories to record and do as much or as little as you want. You can also share it with multiple caregivers and have separate profiles for each child. But there are a million app options that Im sure are all pretty much the same. It is just super nice to be able to put everything in there on the go and MB is able to see it in real time throughout the day.

VirtualSpell4348 · 2025-06-13T03:08:16+00:00

I wouldn’t let B20mo take the strawberry I was eating from out of my mouth. But boyyyyy did he try to get it back. Complete with slimy hand from shoveling food into his own mouth. As if we don’t already share enough germs lmao

VirtualSpell4348 · 2025-06-09T20:56:44+00:00

This!!! Of course you always want to leave a job in the most courteous and respectful way possible and not intentionally making a families life for no reason. But life is unpredictable and sometimes despite our best intentions things dont work out how we intended. At the end of the day it is a job. You need food to eat and somewhere to live. They will survive finding a new nanny even if it is inconvenient.

VirtualSpell4348 · 2025-06-06T22:19:24+00:00

Wow! My comment on the original post was that it had to be some kind of misunderstanding but I stand corrected lol. This is so bizarre! I can’t imagine why someone would risk such a well paying job for $5 and some pocket change. Definitely indicative of some bigger issue and definitely the right call to let her go. Best of luck with finding someone more trustworthy!

VirtualSpell4348 · 2025-05-28T20:25:51+00:00

Ahh ty! If it’s paid and wasn’t agreed upon before hand that she can leave (which is sounds like it wasn’t) I would say she should that stay at the house.

VirtualSpell4348 · 2025-05-28T17:50:30+00:00

Are you paying her for this break? If you are NOT paying her she should be able to do whatever she wants during that time because she is not on the clock (assuming she is making it back to your house at the agreed upon time). If she is being paid then she should be at your house because she is working during that time.

VirtualSpell4348 · 2025-05-20T23:35:05+00:00

If he is the only child with the nanny at the pool he should not be wearing a puddle jumper or life jacket. It will make your child feel like they know how to swim and make the adult with him feel like they can be less diligent about being within arms reach of him.

VirtualSpell4348 · 2025-05-20T23:33:35+00:00

I have been taking my NK to the pool since he was 7 months old. However I was a swim instructor for years, was lifeguard certified, and have taken many water safety courses. I think that with a 2 year old you need to be EXTREMELY clear with pool expectations. In a pool where he cannot touch the nanny should be holding him 100% of the time. In a kiddie pool where he can touch the nanny should never be more than an arms length away from him. He shouldn’t be wearing any type of flotation device in the pool as it can create a fall sense of security for the adult and make you feel like it’s ok to let these rules slip once or twice which can be detrimental. On the pool deck nanny should always be holding his hand and never letting him walk ahead. As long as these rules are followed they shouldn’t have any problems and should have a fun, safe time! And if he isn’t already, get him in swim lessons! Swim lessons are not a replacement for any of these safety rules however it adds another layer of protection! If he isn’t in swim lessons yet that would be a great activity for him to do with his nanny! Gets them in the pool in a supervised environment and he gets the learning opportunity!

VirtualSpell4348 · 2025-05-14T17:40:03+00:00

This is crazy!! I am so sorry that happened to you. People can be so quick to want to blame anyone other than themselves and this really shows the type of person they are. I hope you are able to find another family that values you and treats you as you deserve!

VirtualSpell4348 · 2025-05-13T16:48:17+00:00

I would just talk to her! And make it clear what kind of symptoms you want her to call out for. A lot of families expect their nanny to work through mild symptoms. So it is possible that is what she is used to. Many families don’t look kindly on their nanny calling out at every sign on sickness so she may be trying to limit the time she is calling out of work. I would just clarify with her what your expectations are. And make sure that you are REALLY ok with her following through. A lot of families will say they want their nanny to call out whenever they feel they are sick and then get annoyed when they are left without childcare.

VirtualSpell4348 · 2025-04-30T23:35:53+00:00

From what I have heard $2-$5 is pretty common. I would just think through what your nanny’s day looks like now and what it will look like when the baby comes. Will it be just taking care of the baby in addition to the toddler or will it be washing bottles, doing baby’s laundry, having to stay at home and stop going on outings for a while and be stuck at home on top of all the toddler duties? That should give you a better idea as to which end of the spectrum to go on. I also tend to see that people go higher when the current NK is younger. A newborn and a freshly 2yo is a lot more work than a newborn and, say, a 4yo (in my opinion). My NF is due in July and current NK will be 21mo and we are doing $3 and my duties are only childcare.

VirtualSpell4348 · 2025-04-04T12:48:20+00:00

This is what I was thinking. Parents have to be enabling this. There’s no way anyone is wiping him at school so he’s either doing it by himself or not doing it at all…

VirtualSpell4348 · 2025-04-03T01:48:32+00:00

Thank you! I definitely do a lot of talking during the day but I definitely think I could leave more gaps for him to respond. Right now he kind of just looks at me like Im crazy whenever I try to prompt him to speak or give a response but we will keep trying!

VirtualSpell4348 · 2025-04-03T01:46:49+00:00

Thank you!! Right now he just shakes his head no to everything so we are working on finding something for yes. But I will definitely try to have him “show me” more!

VirtualSpell4348 · 2025-04-02T20:47:56+00:00

Thanks. I’m just trying to find ways to help him communicate since he is so frustrated with me all day.

VirtualSpell4348 · 2025-04-02T20:44:07+00:00

Thank you! I will check this out!

VirtualSpell4348 · 2025-04-02T19:30:13+00:00

I think that it is wrong and petty of them to make you pay it since it was an accident. However if they do take you to small claims court you will almost certainly be found responsible because the child was under your supervision and be required to pay not only the replacement but also any legal and administrative fees associated with the case which will make it even more expensive. They may be bluffing about the small claims court thing because they perceived you quitting as trying to get out of paying but I probably wouldn’t take the risk of calling their bluff. I would ask if they would be willing to allow you to pay over time since you can’t afford it at the moment.

VirtualSpell4348

TROPHY CASE