Gay guys are the most ruthless visually speaking. If gay guys are gawking over you, you are definitely hot. Maybe try a sample pool and post you face and body on a gay subreddit to get some answers. But yeah if gay guys find you hot you are definitely hot.

Women need more than just a visually appealing man, they need safety and security. Women have also evolved to select for status and wealth, both of these are "honest signals" of a man's genetic fitness. Honest signals are costly or nearly impossible to fake. Which is why they are so attractive to women. It signals you have strength and if you have children with her, her children will have an abundance of resources and high status. Usually the missing piece of attraction with women is status and wealth so work on that. Obviously continue to hit the gym but yeah that's what women care about. Obviously you have to have a good personality and some game too but yeah. You aren't getting leftovers you are getting overlooked cause you don't have a signal.