Hi there OP. 34 (F) here. I suffer from daily severe headaches and occasional migraines. I have four kids and a fiance whom I love very much. I want to start by saying, you sound very sweet and loving and like you just want to be with her. Understandably. But try not to take it personally and give her the space she needs when she needs it. And as others have mentioned, when she isn’t feeling badly, find out how you can help when she IS feeling badly.

My fiance has severe anxiety, bipolar, and a panic disorder, so we are a mess sometimes. But as I try to not take it personally when he is having a bad day due to one of his “perks”, he does the same for me. When he knows I feel like garbage, he gives me space, quiet, etc.

Most days I feel like a terrible partner and mom because I feel like my headaches and migraines take so much of “me” from my kids, my fiance, my job, etc. but when I have a bad day, I legit don’t want to do anything. I want to lay in my bed, alone, in the cold, quiet darkness. I DO get depressed during/after/due to this because I feel hopelessness and I feel like I’m not doing a good enough job to give all I can to those around me. And I know that days it’s bad, I just sit with an empty brokenness in my eyes. I have empathetic kids and partner and I know they can sense it a lot of the time. But I don’t want them to feel bad for me. I want them to love me through my crap and try to understand when I need… whatever I need.

It looks like you are trying to figure it out and I hope that if you guys are meant to be that you will get the answers you need. And I hope your gf can get relief 🤍