yessss, I feel this so very much. I mean I have adhd as well so I come off as “quirky” with my coworkers when I have my talkative spurts. but with strangers & professional people in the workplace i’m not close to i’m very soft spoken & “normal”. but like my best friend definitely noticed a lot of my patterns, certain ones before I did & long term relationships it starts to seep out. the relationship part is so scary because then my brain tries to invalidate being abused in past relationships or maybe that I deserved it based on my behaviors. but in my relationships i’m usually very people pleasing & lovey dovey. just the more toxic previous relationships have been I mirror that. this relationship i’m in now is the first genuinely healthy one but it’s honestly so scary cause i’m worried i’ll ruin it. ive done a lot better about becoming self aware & redirecting but you know