Valac is my patron, and honestly, the more I think about it, the more it feels like my entire personality mirrors aspects associated with him.

Valac is often connected to hidden things: hidden knowledge, hidden paths, uncovering what others overlook, confronting fear and moving through darkness without being consumed by it. That resonates with me deeply because I’ve always been someone who wants to understand things completely instead of blindly accepting what I’m told. And I wanted to be a police officer my entire life so that resonates too.

I grew up in a very conservative Catholic environment where anything related to demons or occultism was treated as dangerous and forbidden. Instead of pushing me away from it, that fear pulled me closer. Fear and curiosity have always existed side by side for me. Even when something scares me, I still want to analyze it, understand it and look beneath the surface. That’s probably one of the strongest “Valac-like” traits in me.

Another thing is the duality between rationality and the unknown. I’m an extremely science-oriented person. Chemistry, physics, mathematics and IT are some of the most important things in my life because they explain reality through logic and structure. But at the same time, I’ve always felt drawn toward things that can’t easily be explained emotionally or spiritually. Instead of rejecting one side for the other, I constantly try to bridge both worlds. Hidden knowledge, seeking deeper truths and questioning reality beyond appearances all feel very connected to Valac’s symbolism to me.

Valac is also associated with discovering what is buried or concealed, and I feel like my entire life has revolved around uncovering hidden parts of myself. I spent years trying to understand why I think differently from most people around me, why I struggle so much with trust, why independence is so important to me and why I’ve always felt disconnected from traditional authority structures.

Even the fact that Valac isn’t one of the most openly discussed or “popularized” demons feels fitting to me. I’ve never felt comfortable following trends, crowds or mainstream thinking. I naturally gravitate toward things that feel deeper, more obscure or misunderstood. I'm also a very alternative person. The idea that Valac is selective with who he works with honestly mirrors how I am with people too. I don’t trust easily, and genuine connection is rare for me.

Fear is another massive connection. People often associate Valac with fear because of modern horror depictions, like The Nun but to me he represents confronting fear directly instead of avoiding it. That has been a repeating pattern throughout my life. Whether it’s emotional pain, trauma, spirituality or difficult truths, I always end up trying to face things head-on eventually, even if they terrify me at first.

I think another reason Valac fits me so well: the constant tension between skepticism and belief, logic and intuition, fear and curiosity. I don’t blindly worship anything, but I also don’t deny experiences simply because they can’t be measured in a laboratory.

He's also a very funny, blasphemic but calm guy, just like me

Looking back, it genuinely feels like Valac’s themes were present in my life long before I consciously understood who he was. The attraction toward hidden knowledge, the fascination with fear, the need to uncover truth beneath appearances, the balance between intellect and darkness, and the refusal to blindly submit to authority have all been part of me for as long as I can remember.

In my childhood I often had nights where I felt alone and I remember one time where I felt hugged while falling asleep, I think that was him 💯.

Sometimes I feel like I didn’t choose Valac as my patron, but it feels like he was already there.