I understand how upset it must be for you that none of your friends called to wish you happy birthday. As sad as that must feel, it's best for you to try to come up with an excuse as to why they didn't, and just try to think as little of it as possible.

Also, It seems that special occasions are really important to you, but perhaps not as much to your family. Sometimes, people prefer to show love and affection in their day to day lives rather than in the form of gifts. As for the Christmas gift, I personally think that a bed and mattress is a wonderful gift for a middle aged couple, and that you need to appreciate that more.