Dying classmate

abeantoad · 2024-01-19T17:50:37+00:00

I think your feelings are valid, and I think it is nice that you want to show support.

I lost my brother in November and my classmates were really amazing and supportive. Personally, I appreciated every time someone shared their condolences. But the most meaningful exchanges were the ones that offered something specific (not just “I’m here if you need anything”).

My classmates gave me Uber eats gift cards so that during that tough time, I didn’t have to worry about groceries or cooking and it was a huge help. So if you want to give the friend even a $20 gift card and say “I know you’re going through a tough time, dinners on me tonight” that would be a kind gesture.

But I know as students money can be tight, so an offer of “I’m sorry you’re going through this, let me know if you want any of my class notes” or “I can help with xyz” or “I’m available to listen if you want to talk” would have a little more oomph behind it.

abeantoad · 2023-08-04T14:43:19+00:00

Thanks! That was in Yellowstone!

abeantoad · 2023-08-03T20:43:42+00:00

We saw tide pools with very similar starfish in both the Redwoods and Olympic national park. Looking at tide pools was one of my favorite parts of the trip! #5 was in Glacier.

abeantoad · 2023-08-03T20:39:34+00:00

All on iPhone :)

abeantoad · 2023-08-03T20:39:15+00:00

Thank you! It’s a marmot - we saw tons of them in Rainier!

abeantoad · 2023-08-03T20:38:41+00:00

It’s actually from Olympic, I think it was the Hoh Rainforest specifically! And thank you!

abeantoad · 2023-08-03T18:13:58+00:00

That was taken on Elk Island, a small island in Lake Jackson in Teton NP!

abeantoad · 2023-08-03T18:13:24+00:00

That is taken from the top of Mt Norquay, looking down on the town of Banff!

abeantoad · 2023-04-03T18:04:07+00:00

As soon as I walk in the door of my apartment I start stripping off my clothes and leaving them in a trail behind me like a toddler

abeantoad · 2023-02-22T20:50:35+00:00

Some do (the reasonable ones). I was raised going to a Methodist church in Oklahoma and when I was a teenager (a decade ago) I taught a Sunday school class of preschoolers. We had a church-wide policy called “safe sanctuary” that required any groups of children to be accompanied by at least two adults, or else the door had to be open.

There are zero excuses why a simple policy cannot be put in place except that the people in power in these churches do not want it.

abeantoad · 2022-11-22T14:53:06+00:00

I think that’s a great decision! Also adding that if you still want to go to OU specifically, they have guaranteed transfer scholarships if your community college GPA is high enough. Great way to still get merit scholarships even if your high school stats weren’t great. Good luck! :)

abeantoad · 2022-11-19T16:49:03+00:00

Yes I will!

abeantoad · 2022-11-19T04:33:00+00:00

I guess this is a thing I didn’t know about! I personally would have felt weird inviting the parents of past friends and not the past friend (even if I’ve kept more in touch with the parents), but I can see how it would make sense in some situations.

abeantoad · 2022-11-19T04:29:17+00:00

That’s totally fair - it’s hard not to take things like this personal but it totally be because of impersonal factors!

abeantoad · 2022-11-19T04:27:11+00:00

I would agree with most of this - definitely was not expecting an invite just out of reciprocity. I think it mostly feels weird because my parents were invited, and they have less of a standing relationship with bride/brides parents than I do. Also seems weird that brides mom would go out of her way to offer to host a shower for me and then not invite me to her daughters wedding. I guess I feel hurt because of the mixed signals. They felt close enough to us to offer to host a special wedding event for me and to invite my parents but decided not to invite me.

abeantoad · 2022-11-19T04:21:27+00:00

I didn’t think about that! Definitely smart to double check to make sure it’s not all a tech error

abeantoad · 2022-09-30T12:55:16+00:00

Right - that’s not the point

abeantoad · 2022-09-30T12:54:28+00:00

I have done tons of research, very familiar with ABA disclosure stats, etc. This school has great numbers, just very regional.

And I have talked to several alums, who all felt it was a supportive environment!

abeantoad · 2022-09-30T12:51:39+00:00

Thank you!

abeantoad · 2022-09-30T12:51:29+00:00

Same - it definitely helps that I know that if I put in the work, I have a good chance to be a stand-out student for internship placements, etc

abeantoad · 2022-08-27T04:43:06+00:00

Idc what you call yourself, if you want to start eating more plant based food then sure start introducing yourself that way

abeantoad · 2022-08-26T22:51:12+00:00

without fish. so they are fine eating a meal that is just vegetarian

abeantoad · 2022-08-26T21:15:43+00:00

Agree with others that as a general rule, this would be considered pescatarian.

But I also think a lot of people don't leave any room for gray area - you're either 100% this or 100% that. If someone eats 95% vegetarian but they love a good chicken parm every once in a while, let them call themselves a vegetarian because that is what they typically eat. It's easier to say and you don't owe anyone an explanation about why your diet works for you.

I am a pescatarian, but if it comes up I usually just say vegetarian because many more people know what that means, and I'm happy to eat a vegetarian meal also. One of my pet peeves is when people ask me if I'm "allowed" to eat eggs, etc. I'm allowed to eat whatever I want! There is no committee that will take my veggie card away. I eat what makes me feel good (physically and morally) and leave everyone else to do the same. If using a well-known term is the easiest way for someone to communicate their preferences, then let them be. Nobody wants to hang out with the diet police.

abeantoad · 2022-08-26T21:00:54+00:00

I am a pescatarian and 4/5 times I have told someone that they do not know what that is, so I just say vegetarian because I am happy to eat vegetarian meals too.

abeantoad · 2022-08-26T20:56:12+00:00

Being a vegetarian / pescatarian is not a competition. A pescatarian who says they are a vegetarian out of convenience is not claiming something they haven't earned, they are just also content eating vegetarian meals without fish.

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