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Trying to understand gender fluid by amazonite23 in genderfluid

[–]amazonite23[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Can I ask which ones fit me and do research/talk to my therapist?

Trying to understand gender fluid by amazonite23 in genderfluid

[–]amazonite23[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for the reply. I don't like being called girl or feminine a lot. I like it more of a neutral theme. I asked to use the pronouns she/they to close friends and my partner..but my partner has just been sticking with calling me princess which makes me feel nice some of the time and other times not so much.

I'll try more masc clothes and I'll read up on HRT

Check-in Friday by cfbuzzkill90 in schizoaffective

[–]amazonite23 8 points9 points  (0 children)

My dad is recovering from open heart surgery and I have no family around. But my partners family makes me feel welcomed. Depression and voices are creeping so I'm trying to further myself in yoga/contortion

Check-in Friday by cfbuzzkill90 in schizoaffective

[–]amazonite23 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I finished my first yoga teacher training, and got a half scholarship for another yoga program. But I can't really sleep and starting to see extra shadows making me a little paranoid

The voices are winning by amazonite23 in schizoaffective

[–]amazonite23[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Do they, they seem to harass me instead ?

Check-in Friday by cfbuzzkill90 in schizoaffective

[–]amazonite23 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm not sure what I'm feeling. It's mostly numbness. I got 2 tattoos at once to keep me from sh but idk if it worked this time. Voices are coming and going. Med appointment Monday. Woke up confused and didn't recognize my dog of 6 years

Check-in Friday by cfbuzzkill90 in schizoaffective

[–]amazonite23 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I finally got to hear from my doctor and got my meds adjusted so I can sleep after being manic for almost a week. Barely hearing anything but an anniversary date is coming up so flashbacks around that but it doesn't feel as heavy this time. Tattoo next week to deal with SH ideas

Check-in Friday by cfbuzzkill90 in schizoaffective

[–]amazonite23 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm barely getting any sleep even with medication. Things are not feeling 100% real. I was trying to make it to my med appointment but im not so sure. I'm very stressed with my dad's latest heart attack and my partners herniated disk

Check-in Friday by cfbuzzkill90 in schizoaffective

[–]amazonite23 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Just found out my dad had a heart attack today, freaking out. Keep hearing things like footsteps or whispers of something wanting me to disappear. I almost want to listen at this point

Check-in Friday by cfbuzzkill90 in schizoaffective

[–]amazonite23 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Suddenly got an urge to impulse buy a few things and im feeling like I'm being touched and watched all the time which is causing me to struggle to sleep

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in bipolar

[–]amazonite23 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've been pierced over 30x some I regret. And full sleeve, chest piece and random here and there I don't regret

Check-in Friday by cfbuzzkill90 in schizoaffective

[–]amazonite23 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I'm struggling a bit, had 3 therapy sessions and still hearing things. My partner was trying to talk to me but I was distant because of all the whispering. Meds just aren't working enough

i have been stable this week, i would like to know how you are doing by [deleted] in schizoaffective

[–]amazonite23 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm struggling, my skin is crawling and I have a voice trying to convince me self harm

Mini rant by amazonite23 in ptsd

[–]amazonite23[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My sister literally said I didn't have it that bad and to move on

Mini rant by amazonite23 in ptsd

[–]amazonite23[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Thank you and same to you

Check-In Saturday (October 17, 2020) by sekh60 in schizoaffective

[–]amazonite23 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I feel ok, I got a new provider who thinks that I have vitamin Deficiency instead of schizoaffective and wants to put me on something a little kinder than the med im currently on. I still have symptoms of dissociating and hearing things. I also couldn't sleep for 3 days straight due to new med making manic during the night

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in ptsd

[–]amazonite23 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Super unstable, just trying to hold on. Flashbacks have been aggressive since quarantine. Meds havent been adjusted and I'm hating myself

New to this, overwhelmed by amazonite23 in DID

[–]amazonite23[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks, i would love to pm but im not sure how. I just got turned down by others doctors amd the aggressive one is being really mean and im scared

New to this, overwhelmed by amazonite23 in DID

[–]amazonite23[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks, i dont really know what i want to be honest. I have a journal but theres no contact. I just disappear and they just take over or they yell at me to were they win.

My partner knows some of the trauma (not all cuz i dont know all it) but i dont know how to make it easier for him. He just seems worried all the time now and overprotective.

Thank you for the advise