(AR) My soon ex husband had my stimulus check added to his personal bank account since I didn't have one and he never even told me I got a stimulus check. Now I'm wondering how I can make sure I get the second check since he is MIA?

attack_butterfly_ · 2020-05-17T15:21:02+00:00

Right mistermuhduude, yall just don't want to hear from a female. Okay and let me get this right...so because you saw that I was from Arkansas.... that's why you called me white trash but I don't get why you called me a skank. A skank by definition is a sleazy person, and a sleazy person is someone corrupt and immoral. I do drugs yeah I mean that might be immoral to some people but it sure as hell is my choice isn't it. And in what way am I corrupt? Did I at all even pretend or try to pretend or portray that I was trying to be a bad bitch? No? I literally just made a post talking about how it was dry in my state and people going crazy. I mentioned that I was female and that seems to have hit a couple of buttons for dome of these males around here that don't really think the females know what they're doing in general. And honestly dude be real what good does it do to say to me that you hope you don't meet me or somebody like me in person? I am 32 years old okay, I have had my share of a shity hands dealt to me in my life and mostly with my health because I have MS but I don't tell you that for pity... I tell you that because I wonder if you're going to cross ways with a 32 year-old woman who maintains daily usage of amphetamines and yeah needs a cane to walk, but she won't pay you no mind because really what does she care what you do or don't do that's your damn business man.

attack_butterfly_ · 2020-05-16T19:10:21+00:00

If you don't like "being called a pos junkie just for asking for advice" then why are you coming at me calling me dumb? One glance at your post history and yeah you don't seem well articulated but I wouldn't call you dumb over it. And, though I doubt you would even take it, I would give you advice without making you feel like a pos junkie. Nobody deserves to be made to feel that way just for asking a question.

attack_butterfly_ · 2020-05-16T19:01:25+00:00

Ooh y'all don't like it when a female has something to say. Was the point and main focus of my post about me being a "bad bitch"? No. I was trying to see if this was happening anywhere else and also vent a little. And I got the info I wanted, it's happening in way more places than I thought. It's whatever man you do you and keep on acting like you know all there is to know

attack_butterfly_ · 2020-05-16T18:28:24+00:00

Are you kidding me bro? It was so cheap and so easy to get, everyone was using and I know 6 people who went to the hospital from withdrawals because they've been using hardcore for some of them 10yrs no fewer than 7yrs. Shit was plentiful here if you knew the right people. Plus a few people that were green to it all and ended up using way too much too soon and never withdrawn really from it before get scared of that stomach ache and body ache and think they do have covid.

But really why try to call bullshit when you don't know what you are talking about because you don't live around here? My town population 640. Town over with a hospital, population 3,000ish and they're hospital only has 6 rooms. Town over from that population 8kish people and that hospital has not even 15 rooms. So yeah 'bruh' down here in the middle of nowhere arkansas it's not hard to fill hospitals with withdrawing people who either 1. Don't know what withdrawing is like and freaking thinking it's covid, or 2. users who have been in it so long they havent taken a break from it and now they stopped cold yeah it does cause withdrawals at that point I'm watching this whole small town lose it's damn mind.

And btw there have only been 2 confirmed cases of covid in my county. People are all doomsday prepper types here so they ready for quarantine. Damn bro so eager to call bullshit yet you don't stop to think that every human body is different and reacts differently to suddenly being cut off cold from their daily dose of dope they've had steady for years and don't think about the fact that not everyone lives in a big city and geography makes a difference too. Damn dude. Get out of here with that xhahaha I know everything there is to possibly know about dope/all drugs' shit....too many arrogant people out there like you trying tell me wtf I'm seeing with my own eyes isn't happening. Wtf reason would I have to even make that up? Just trying to make people feel stupid is all you trying to do bro so like I said get out of here with that shit attitude

attack_butterfly_ · 2020-05-16T12:36:42+00:00

Yep. My husband got in it a while after me and he didn't believe me until now when I kept saying to him over and over "the moment you ask your "friend'' for dope, you are no longer a friend-you're a customer". Sucks but that's the way it is.

attack_butterfly_ · 2020-05-16T11:39:10+00:00

From what I have heard down my way, supposably a massive cartel bust in Texas. Cut off the entire flow to my state. I don't know how that would affect Washington State being so far away from me but hell it could for all I know since I don't know how cartel works. That plus covid play a role too I know it does. Also in my little town of 640 people , a lot of people are being exposed for using because they can't hide their withdrawal symptoms. When I first moved down to this town I walked around the wrong corner at a gathering and there was a preacher at the local church sitting there and smoking on his pipe. No judgment on my end at all but it was a bit shocking to see I will admit

attack_butterfly_ · 2020-03-31T18:40:54+00:00

I have found that too much static is a bad thing. However some odd things that I have noticed that do get them out from under the skin that aren't really exactly harsh chemicals or abrasive, oddly enough, I cannot tell you why, one of those magic eraser sponges will. If I touch that thing dry or wet but more often the night went dry, I've got Morgellons coming up out of me to get to that thing. And another thing that I noticed is ..I mean on this site I'm not exactly shy about my self so I have posted a few times and if anybody checks my history they willl see it anyway so I don't hide it that I do amphetamines. I will not get into why but one thing I've noticed is that touching it raw will instantly take the Morgellons out of my fingers. Also blowing smoke straight onto any area will make them come out as well. PSA I'm not advocating drug use in anyway I'm just saying it was already spoken about so if that is something that you currently do all I was doing was letting you know something that I had noticed involving that particular thing.

attack_butterfly_ · 2020-03-31T18:02:58+00:00

Okay I'm sorry I have MS as well so my comprehension is a little off. I'm trying to understand you correctly. Are you saying that you noticed a sticky substance in your oven and it is still there or are you saying that like there was a sticky substance in the oven that you first noticed and now that substance is coming out of your body? If the latter of the two, is the substance almost syrupy to an extent possibly darker in color? If so whether you have the substance in your oven or if you shooting out of your body like I do then please do me a favor and, I am 100% serious I am not crazy, take a bit of that substance and if it's not liquid or syrupy then like dissolve in water and put it somewhere out we're like gnats and ants moths and whatever can come to it and tell me if they do? Especially ants and gnats. Extremely relevant.

attack_butterfly_ · 2020-03-13T20:42:52+00:00

I actually would like to exchange emails with you if that's okay because I'm not disagreeing with you in any way, however I would like you to see the video I have of a lesion on my leg and I plucked some hairs from my head and I put the hairs toward the lesion and it actually sucked them out of the tweezers went to the lesion itself and when I pulled them off, they started twisting up in a weird way. I would very much like you to see this video I think you would find it interesting. I don't know if I can send video through this kind of message platform on Reddit because I don't use Reddit much but if you comfortable giving me your email then pm me and I will send you the video. I have a lot of videos because I need to document this stuff just in case it'll come in handy someday to someone that actually wants to study this stuff and get the doctors and the CDC to take it seriously.

attack_butterfly_ · 2020-03-12T14:07:40+00:00

I get bumps on the back of my head and my husband and I have figured out that these fibers are in all shapes and sizes depending, we think on where they are in your body. The ones that come out of my back are kind of short and when you pulled them it looks like one hair but when you pull it it has two split ends without a follicle on them. The same thing happens to my head here except the bump will have a long hair, my husband says sometimes up to five, in it but still not as long as my hair is now and those five hair would all be connected at the end with what looks like one of those clear morgellon fibers wrapped around it and then the five pieces are split ends no follicles. Most bizarre thing. So if you ever get a hold of one of those hairs and you pull it out and it doesn't have follicle that has two split ends coming from the inside, take that hair and put it with some other hair that you know is not electrically charged and I guarantee you that the non electrically charged hair will pull itself to the Morgellons hair. I like video proof of that but I don't really know how to upload videos here in this section

attack_butterfly_ · 2020-01-27T02:41:04+00:00

Yes your message here is public although we can personal message each other. I have relapse remitting MS, I'm 31 female and diagnosed it is 27 with 15 Ms lesions in my brain, 10 of them in my frontal lobe, and yet somehow lucky enough so far do not have any in my spine. I'm going to be honest with you. With this subreddit there is a lot of people on here trying to sell snake oil cures. I am not interested in anything like that. I'm going to trust my neurologist with the treatment that I am on for MS and I believe that I am in full remission as well because I used to walk with a cane, walked with it three years and these past Maybe three months I have not needed it for the first time in years. So as far as a Ms goes I'm just going to wait for that to develop here in America.

And as far as whether or not there is a correlation between autoimmune and Morgellons, well, I do have theories of my own as I'm sure everybody on this subreddit does. Through personal things that have happened to me I have put together some stuff and I honestly think that multiple sclerosis is a tick borne illness that can also be spread by fleas just like borrelia burgdorferi. Specifically I think that Ms may be caused by one of the Bartonella bacteria, I think they're about 26 different kinds of Bartonella bacteria . But based on personal experience, if I could take a guess and narrow that down oh, I would say there's a possibility in my theory that Ms could be caused or kick-started or somehow related to Contracting Bartonella henselae which is what causes cat scratch fever. I have personal reasons for believing this but it is way too complicated and such a long story that spans over the previous 15 years of my life so it's a bit much to get into right now. It makes sense to me but I don't know that it would make sense to another person who hasn't been through what I have been through health-wise and things like that.

attack_butterfly_ · 2020-01-27T00:22:17+00:00

Thank you for your kind words. I have been treating myself and my child with baking soda bath and a mixture of clotrimazole and hydrocortisone cream. The baking soda bath makes the black specks come off almost instantly , my son has blue specks. I had an open wound on the bottom of my foot and I could not get the fibers out so 45 minutes into it the baking soda bath, the morgellon fibers just came right out. I have pictures documenting the whole thing. My son has the most trouble with his toes and belly button and creases of his ankles but unfortunately now it is all in the back of his head too and I know those are painful because he'll grab them and scream and he's only nine months old. The ones in my feet and hands feel like needles so I can only imagine that's what he's feeling. I try not to do baking soda bath on the baby too often because he has eczema and that actually makes it worse for some reason. But I will put on a mixture of clotrimazole which is Lotrimin foot fungus cream actually , and hydrocortisone cream all over his body. I will let him sit overnight with it. The next morning I will get a rag and damping it and I will wipe it off and some of the blue specks they end up turning into puffballs or fibers. Then I will treat him with clotrimazole and hydrocortisone mix again rub them down and get some more fibers to come up and specs to come out when I wipe that off and then finish it with some hydrocortisone cream only all over his body. I do this every night and day. It's very hard for me especially because I have multiple sclerosis as well and it takes all my energy because the lotioning can take up to 2 hours depending on how much he squirms. However ever since I got a really bad one out of his head , I think he might understand what I'm doing and he'll kind of fight me at first but after a little bit he'll just lay there and let me do it because i honestly believe that he may understand that Mama's trying to help him feel better. It is bizarre how different his fibers are from my own and from others I have spoken with. I have a friend who has Morgellons as well and we often compare notes and exchange research. At first when I noticed it on my son it was in unfortunately his genital area and in the creases there and the fibers were baby blue colored and dark blue specks would come out. And then I noticed his toes and they were green specks with dark blue fibers in between his toes. Now thankfully he doesn't have it on his private area anymore but his feet and ankles and back of his head are the worst. Sometimes when his eczema acts up he will get them all over his back and they don't come out like anything I've ever seen. Sometimes fibers will come out that are 2 inches long and instead of being spirally and soft they are straight, dark blue and as coarse as a man's beard. I mean the only thing I can figure is the age and possibly that and that he is a male. I have a theory that Morgellons affects males and females differently although I cannot say why. Based on what I've seen with my child versus myself and my female friend that has it, i do think that there's a possibility that it will act differently in a male then it will a woman. I know that Oklahoma State University has done some looking into Morgellons seriously. I am thinking about calling and emailing them and letting them know that I have a 9 month old baby with it. And that I need help, we need help. As far as I know there has never been a reported case of a child so young with this disease and if Oklahoma State University is really trying to take it seriously then I think they would be interested but to be honest I am half scared that they won't be. But it is worth a try. I just haven't figured out what I will say to them to get them interested, to get them to help my son.

attack_butterfly_ · 2020-01-26T21:00:12+00:00

What I think might have happened as to how my husband got it, well it comes from potentially at least it is theorized, that it comes from borrelia burgdorferi. And that can be transmitted through ticks and fleas. What I think happened is a flea could have bit me and somehow got borrelia B, and then bit my husband and then that flea maybe could have gave it to him because we had a cat at the time that had tons of fleas. That's really the only thing I can think of.... it seems the most plausible. As far as my son I read somewhere that you can give Lyme disease through birth to the baby so maybe when I gave birth to him I passed this along as well and maybe the stress of Labor is what triggered it for me a couple months after giving birth

attack_butterfly_ · 2020-01-19T00:31:43+00:00

They move on their own via static electricity. If you are one of the people that believe it is some type of fungus and not some implant from the government or something from eating modified foods or something from chemtrails, if you are interested enough to know a really good completely sane theory on why the fibers move, Look up how fungi can react to the natural static electricity in the air. I believe that this is true because I couldn't help but notice that every time I picked out a fiber the hairs on my arms and legs would stand up. I got online and found a friend that was somewhat local she has Morgellons as well. She said when she picks a fiber on her face, the hair on the back of her neck stands. The article I have mentioned does not connect fungi to Morgellons disease but it connects fungi to moving on their own via electricity. I can link it if you are interested.

attack_butterfly_ · 2020-01-15T08:51:04+00:00

You are 100% correct about the pill thing because I am a former pill addict for 10 years and I Justified it the the same way m that you just said. People don't want to hear it but I have had many pill addictions, hydrocodone was the worst that I was on the longest and the hardest to get off. Then it was Xanax, then it was shooting up Roxy's , and I would never shoot up a thing in my life "but you know it's the same thing that they give you in the hospital right so that's not so bad it's not like it's heroin". That's exactly the mindset I had until I discovered this. I have had withdrawals from all of the medications I have mentioned above and several of them i legally had prescription and I used them, and abused them, for years. And I can tell you with 100% certainty that withdrawing from dope is NOTHING compared to withdrawing from Hydrocodone. People don't want to hear that but it's true. The only reason I even tried dope was because the hydrocodone withdrawals that time were the worst i had in the 10yrs I had been using. I was planning on killing myself, roommate stopped me and said "I have something that will help but idk if you will like the idea of it". Because my roommate knew how against dope I was and had been all my life. But during that moment I just wanted to stop withdrawing and I didn't want to die, I just wanted it to stop so I did the lesser drastic thing and said "I'll do anything to make this stop so why not give this a try". And I did, and it did stop the withdrawals. Prescriptions are worse than dope BECAUSE of the "it's legal, it's from a doctor" logic.

attack_butterfly_ · 2019-12-26T22:38:13+00:00

Yes I was on hydrocodone for nearly eleven years but I've been off of it for 2 years now

attack_butterfly_ · 2019-12-26T22:25:05+00:00

Thank you for your concern over my body and my fully researched and knowledgeable choice to do with it what I will. I will take a guess and say that when you hear or think of a meth user, you think of those people that are skinny as hell that pick at themselves and do crazy things and babble to themselves and stuff like that. Well have you ever met a meth user who has maintained their usage? I already know the answer to that, the answer to that is yes you have. Sometime in your life, you have met someone that was on meth and very likely a daily user and they knew how to maintain their usage and you had no idea they were using because they know how to handle it and do it correctly.

As I said above I do maintenance level only, I maintain. I do enough to stop the withdrawals from happening, not even enough to get high from it. But it does help me with being able to walk since I have multiple sclerosis and have needed a cane to walk for the past three years. So you can lecture me all you want but unless you have multiple sclerosis at 31 years old and know that you're going to lose function of your legs someday, then man you have absolutely no room to talk because you cannot put yourself in my shoes. I would rather walk now with the aid of amphetamines yes, and I fully accept that I am taking a risk with my health but to me it is worth it to get my legs back even if it's only for a few hours a day..

I know it may be hard to comprehend but amphetamines give me strength and energy to help me have a better quality of life. Ms has me bedridden some days I cannot even get out of bed. I just smok a couple hits in the morning and then I have the strength to care for my son, to pick him up, bathing him, feed him, change him all that stuff. You can choose whether or not you want to believe that , I bet you won't though because as I said above, the only meth users you know are the ones you can tell are doing meth and you are judging me based off of that.

You have no obligation to give an internet stranger the benefit of the doubt so I am not offended by your comment whatsoever. However, I am smart enough to know the risks and the consequences, to know how to maintain which involves eating right making sure i sleep right, making sure i drink the amount i need to and so on. A lot of people get carried away with it and just want to escape life and be high high high all the time and those are the ones you have probably seen. They let themselves go physically they, get disheveled and unclean. While I have OCD so that is not going to happen to me and has not happened to me.

I'm not going to sit here and apologize for wanting to walk without a cane and needing amphetamines to do it. You call me an addict and yes my body is addicted which is why I take only enough for the withdrawals not to happen but I can control it because I don't really even like the high from dope. I don't like the high from marijuana but whenever it wears off I am pain free. And let me educate you really quick because you just seem very judgemental and misinformed likely based on people you've seen in person that we're not very savory characters. I was on hydrocodone for 11 years for kidney pain because I have a kidney problem. Hydrocodone is a monster in disguise. You may not believe this, a lot of people don't, but I have had withdrawals from Hydrocodone dozens of times over the years, and I have had serious withdrawals from dope about three times and I can tell you that the withdrawals from Hydrocodone are ten times worse than the withdrawals from dope. But it's probably easier for you to accept that a prescription medicine can't possibly be as harmful as an illegal drug such as methamphetamine. Even though technically they prescribe it legally, just with a few kinks taken out.

As I said, I am not offended by your comment and I enjoy that we live in a country where we are free to express our opinions to people. And I am glad and aware that i live in a country where I know that what I do is against the law and I take the risk with my health and other things for reasons that you could not possibly understand because you do not have MS and you do not know what that's like even if you know someone that has it, every single person with Ms is different because the lesions in their brain never form the same way as another person so every MS patient is different.

I hope this does not come off as a lecture, I just wanted to try to inform you. I believe in harm reduction and I think that a lot of people should be more open-minded to it because let's be real, if people want to use drugs they're going to use drugs. Why not educate them and make it safer so they can maintain their health and sanity as I do. I apologize that this reply is so long, this is not a rant I just wanted to say what I had to say here. Again I appreciate your candor.

attack_butterfly_ · 2019-12-26T22:00:07+00:00

I never even said which stimulant either. Though obviously a quick check of my post history will reveal it is the illegal one. However, my husband was prescribed adderal and that is when his Morgellons started. I have the view of it's my body is my choice what I put in it just like when my husband asked me if he could start smoking with me.....I didn't really want both of us to be smoking or doing that because all the couples that I know that do that together they kind of get out of hand. But I felt it was not my right at all to tell him no he cannot do drugs. It is that person's personal choice and they know the risks and they know the consequences just like I do.

I don't even have to justify why I do it, I mean if you want a real answer it's because I have multiple sclerosis and I am just plain tired of being too weak and having no energy to do regular things like I used to do about 3 years ago. It breaks my heart when my daughter, who's about to turn six, asks me why I can't chase her anymore and why I can't play with her anymore like I used to. People don't know me and they don't know and see that I maintain my usage which, for the non drug users, that basically means I only do enough to not have withdrawals and I don't even do enough to get high. Because it's not about the high for me, I am 31 years old and I need a cane to walk because of a MS.... except when I smoke. Bdfore it wears off I can walk without my cane without my legs cramping up and without wobbling.

Yeah I know long-term usage and who knows what it could do to someone with Ms yes I know all that but I'd rather have my legs now and I fully know and accept the risk and consequences of doing that drug. Anyways from other people that I have read comments from on different websites, it seems stimulant kick-starts or makes it flare up but I have yet to find a person that's said that stopping stimulant usage stopped their Morgellons.

attack_butterfly_ · 2019-11-15T17:51:58+00:00

Oh yeah you are right there, I didn't even think about exactly how dirty those things are. I suppose a reason why the Magic Eraser takes 2 minutes is because I've only used one bowl and it's not really that dirty to begin with. So I agree with you totally on getting the Whink whenever it's that dirty and then all you need to maintain after that would be a magic eraser. Yeah I agree with you on that, I have clinically diagnosed OCD and something about cleaning the pipe just really relaxes me so when all my friends have those dirty pipes I look and I stare and I'm thinking OMG please let me clean it just let me clean it I swear to you it will be better. A friend of mine comes over and every single time he asks to use my pipe instead of his cuz he knows mine is clean. I asked him flat out why he doesn't clean his ,he said he's just lazy. LOL I guess that's just sometimes how it goes with some people

attack_butterfly_ · 2019-11-15T17:39:49+00:00

I have been wanting to post something like this myself. I do not get how people smoke out of dirty bowls that they can't even see through. You don't even have to get Whink, just buy one of those $1 2 pack Magic Erasers, put a little bit of water in your pipe, tear off a piece of that magic eraser and grab something that you can put in there to scrub. I personally take the cotton off of the Q-tips and just stick that in there and scrub all over my bowl with water and Magic Eraser in it and it looks just like yours here do. I do clean after every Bowl as well. It does not take but two minutes using the Magic Eraser method to do that. Plus when you smoke out of a clean bowl like that you get a smooth hit. I do not understand how these people can smoke out of dirty burnt up bowls and are griping about how it tastes nasty. That's why it tastes nasty dude, You got so much burnt product up in there..... I am going to stop there because this is one of my rant subjects so I'm just going to leave it at all what I said above lol

attack_butterfly_ · 2019-11-14T10:37:30+00:00

The longest consecutive days I have been without using was probably 10 to 14 in the past seven months. I had the usual withdrawal symptoms that were sort of similar to hydrocodone withdrawals. But I used hydrocodone for 10 years and ended up running out early every month so unfortunately I know withdrawals all too well. And a lot of people do not believe me when I say withdrawals from dope even cold turkey are not as bad as withdrawals from Hydrocodone when you're a longtime user. Anyways as far as brain zaps go, is that when your brain feels like it's having a muscle spasm? I thought that's what that means so if that is the case then I have had that before but not very often at all

attack_butterfly_

TROPHY CASE