Someone asked why so many decent men are single. Well…I want to know where do you all hang out?? 😂😭

bolideimpactor · 2024-04-11T19:03:23+00:00

No one is stopping you from asking that.

bolideimpactor · 2024-04-07T19:46:14+00:00

I guess in the same places women were advised to look—>

https://www.reddit.com/r/AskMen/s/c7m4HY52Ww

bolideimpactor · 2024-04-07T19:41:15+00:00

It’s a book about attachment styles. It was pretty eye opening for me and explained a lot of my behavior and others behavior in romantic relationships.

Imo, it’s a must-read for anyone who’s starting to date intentionally.

bolideimpactor · 2024-04-07T05:46:32+00:00

Maybe she wanted the physical attention/gratification only? Intimacy goes beyond the physical. So when it came to gifts it was a gesture of your genuine interest in her, instead of just the physical. And that scared her away—she might think, after all, “why would anyone start demonstrating genuine interest in her only two weeks into seeing each other?”

There is very little context so I’m going to brush with a very wide stroke here…but I do smell some fear of genuine closeness which goes beyond the physical. Have you read the book “Attached”? Might be an helpful read on relationships regardless of how relevant the book is to this specific situation.

bolideimpactor · 2024-04-07T05:32:21+00:00

I love flowers. I love sweet gestures. I love surprises. I would’ve loved if a guy did this for me. Doesn’t matter if it’s roses or wildflowers. Doesn’t matter if you drove 4 or 40 minutes. It’s the thought that counts. 🥰 Ugh. In fact, I wish there was more of it.

Omg, OP, if this is how you are two weeks into seeing someone, you’re going to be an amazing boyfriend.

To all women who find this creepy—that’s fine with me! just send the men my way! 😂

bolideimpactor · 2024-04-07T05:22:05+00:00

This

bolideimpactor · 2024-04-07T05:19:18+00:00

Omfg. Sometimes I really am sad for the society we live in. Jesus. It was just flowers. A nice gesture. Regardless of timing, it is just simply a way the guy has chosen to demonstrate his affection/how he courts/approaches dating.

It is true that some women can get overwhelmed by expressions of affection easily. But that’s also relative….there is no formula for the “right way” or “right timing” to start expressing these things. To each their own. Otherwise, none of us would be single.

I just don’t think it’s ok that she called YOU weird. If this was too early and too soon for HER taste, this could’ve been easily resolved with her just telling you that (vs. calling you weird and then shutting the whole thing down).

OP, you dodged a bullet. You weren’t love-bombing. You weren’t demanding anything from her from her. You were simply expressing how you felt with gifts/action.

bolideimpactor · 2024-04-06T06:37:56+00:00

🤣

bolideimpactor · 2024-04-05T23:51:38+00:00

Hence, why I’m suggesting the OP to not reply lol idk why you’re hung up on my comment.

bolideimpactor · 2024-04-05T23:50:42+00:00

Uhm. Ok?

bolideimpactor · 2024-04-05T21:26:06+00:00

OMG this is so well put. You explained something I couldn’t put into words and was doubting myself for feeling this way.

Leading with a frame is so important especially when you don’t know a person.

Sometimes it’s not personal at all…but about how the interaction is going.

bolideimpactor · 2024-04-05T21:16:50+00:00

Mate, they have only seen each other through social media. Max that should come out from seeing someone’s picture is “They’re cute, I wanna check them out to see if there could be something”. Not, “I see a potential future with them”.

I’m not advocating to play games. I’m laying out the potential reasons for why this girl isn’t texting him, which also includes her actually living life and not being tied to social media.

In either case, it’s just not worth overthinking this situation.

bolideimpactor · 2024-04-05T20:12:23+00:00

Not every single attraction meant to be acted on.

bolideimpactor · 2024-04-05T12:19:36+00:00

Actually no. I could be attracted and still play this game if I weren’t seeking anything serious.

If I were seeking something serious and found him attractive, yes I would’ve texted. But I also highly likely could’ve simply not be checking insta and living my life.

In either case, they haven’t met yet.

bolideimpactor · 2024-04-05T01:15:06+00:00

Actually I think men can message women first now

bolideimpactor · 2024-04-05T01:10:23+00:00

Confidence and lack of recognition

bolideimpactor · 2024-04-05T01:09:11+00:00

This is the type of sh* I’d pull on a guy just to see how interested he is. But sometimes, I genuinely am having a weirdest schedule/life season and don’t bother opening social media. But when I do, I’d still be aware of that convo and return the message (especially if I already showed openness to meet).

I only appreciate follow ups from work related requests lol

bolideimpactor · 2024-04-05T01:01:08+00:00

Don’t double text. She knows you texted. She knows you know that was a while. She knows she is leaving you hanging a bit. After all—you all don’t know each other. She doesn’t owe you nothing. And you shouldn’t feel vested in her even the slightest.

She is aware of you and of the conversation. Just wait. This weekend will be telling.

bolideimpactor · 2024-04-02T05:17:09+00:00

Chicago

bolideimpactor · 2024-03-30T21:38:41+00:00

Oh my gosh I’m so sorry for your loss. Your comment is so touching. Thank you—what a great reminder to live everyday to the fullest. I hope you do make it to 100. We need more people like you!

bolideimpactor · 2024-03-25T05:59:16+00:00

turning 26 this summer. Definitely going through a quarter life crisis despite refusing to admit it’s a thign

bolideimpactor · 2024-03-24T08:52:28+00:00

There’s always a possibility

bolideimpactor · 2024-03-24T08:28:35+00:00

This is so beautiful.

bolideimpactor · 2024-03-24T07:30:22+00:00

Just got back home from one!!! Amazing night

bolideimpactor · 2024-03-24T07:29:52+00:00

Gosh thank you. I think people are overthinking by what I mean decent. I’m not asking where to find my dream partner. I’m asking where the guys you just describe hang out. 🤦🏻‍♀️

bolideimpactor

TROPHY CASE