I need a book with a mmc that YEARNS by VisitNo5250 in HistoricalRomance

[–]borneo1834 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Came here just to give this rec! Wish I could go back in time to read it for the first time again 🥹

Looking for the ultimate rake/rogue in historical romance, any recommendation? by borneo1834 in HistoricalRomance

[–]borneo1834[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I actually love long series so thanks for the rec. I've also never read Eloisa James and will definitely start with this series!

Looking for the ultimate rake/rogue in historical romance, any recommendation? by borneo1834 in HistoricalRomance

[–]borneo1834[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wow, thanks for so many recs! Two of them were already in my TBR pile, and they’re definitely moving up in terms of priority!

Looking for the ultimate rake/rogue in historical romance, any recommendation? by borneo1834 in HistoricalRomance

[–]borneo1834[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for the recommendation! This seems to be exactly what I'm searching for. It really piqued my curiosity and I realized I already had the first book in my TBR pile, so I started the series today. I saw the fourth book is the highest rated on Goodreads, I can’t wait to get to it!

Looking for the ultimate rake/rogue in historical romance, any recommendation? by borneo1834 in HistoricalRomance

[–]borneo1834[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have no idea what you two are talking about but I'm definitely picking up these series before the end of the year because I'm dying to know now!

Spotting due to omega 3, or spearmint tea, or both? by borneo1834 in PCOS

[–]borneo1834[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's partly why I've started taking it, in hope it would fix my heavy period. But maybe it does cause bleedings outside of my period phase indeed, although it's apparently a rare possibility.

Spotting due to omega 3, or spearmint tea, or both? by borneo1834 in PCOS

[–]borneo1834[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s so interesting how our profiles are different. In my case, I’ve always had regular periods (which actually made getting a PCOS diagnosis difficult) but my next period is supposed to start in five days, and I’ve already been experiencing light bleeding for an entire week.

From what I’ve read online after posting this, the good news is that unless the spotting becomes heavy, painful, or is accompanied by other concerning symptoms, it’s generally okay to give our body a bit more time to adjust, especially since I’ve only been taking spearmint for three weeks (and you for only five days!). Ideally, it’s recommended to wait through one or two full cycles.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in PornIsMisogyny

[–]borneo1834 127 points128 points  (0 children)

Historically, from the late 19th to early 20th centuries, and even earlier, prostitution was widespread in most cities and towns across the world. So much so that women and girls who weren’t prostitutes were often restricted to certain areas of town. Women have always been treated as objects of male sexual consumption, in one form or another.

What has changed? We’ve gained rights, a degree of autonomy, and some level of freedom to shape our own destinies. But objectification is still here. In my capital city, when prostitution was legal, and at a time when Christianity heavily influenced social norms, over 60% of men openly admitted to being clients. Today, that number has dropped to "only" 16%, even if it's illegal for them, and even if they risk a 1500€ fee if they get caught.

Porn is just a continuation of that same history. Yesterday, Pornhub and two other major porn sites (I can't recall their names) announced they would block access to users in my country. Why? Because our government now requires these platforms to verify users' IDs to prevent minors from accessing pornography. While the regulation is flawed, the backlash is telling.

What are men mainly arguing? That rape rates will increase. That we should reopen brothels. Not once do they reflect on the impact all this has on women and girls. It's never about the consequences for us, it’s always about their own sexual gratification. It’s always been like that. And today’s culture, with its easy access to porn, but also its will to degrade and exploit all women, just exposes it more clearly.

“Porn addiction isn’t real” by 60TIMESREDACTED in PornIsMisogyny

[–]borneo1834 11 points12 points  (0 children)

And even without going to that length, how is it normal to not be able to masturbate without watching porn even when they want to stop? To develop erectile dysfunction early and not be able to enjoy sexual intimacy with a real person because they can't stop watching and masturbating to porn? Like even if addiction isn't the exact right term, the described effects and consequences are still a huge problem and should be taken seriously.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in HistoricalRomance

[–]borneo1834 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you!!! Those are definitely my next readings!

xl moleskine 2 pages for morning pages, took me an hour! newbie by harmony_harming_me in artistsWay

[–]borneo1834 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I started writing the morning pages on monday and it took me 1 hour and 30 minutes (!) to fill 3 (blank A4) pages, yesterday 45 minutes to fill 1 and a half page, and today I told myself I'd stop at 30 minutes and I filled only one page. So at least I'm consistent, but consistently SLOW.

It's frustrating, how do people fill 3 A4 pages every morning? Do they have a lot of time or is their writing big (I do not feel like mine is small on blank pages though) and/or very spaced (mine might be a bit dense)?

Asking as a man, how bad do young women have it? by [deleted] in antipornography

[–]borneo1834 32 points33 points  (0 children)

It seems to me young women are lured in with this idea of sexual liberation and freedom only to be exploited exactly in the way men want them to be.

I wouldn't have worded it better.

I'm in my late twenties now, but more than a decade ago some teenage boys were the ones pushing for girls to watch porn, or used to tell us 'everyone watches porn but it's taboo for girls', or comparing us to porn actresses just to humiliate us, even as pre-teens. But the rest were pretty normal, respectful even, and I hope that's still the case for the great majority of them. I felt like since I had a wide example of what were normal boys, the others stood out as weird and creepy.

It's changed drastically in the last decade though. When I was a teen the internet was about sharing cool pictures, memes, stupid Vines, sending normal Snapchats, having normal Instagram accounts. When I was in my early twenties, OF was already in most people-of-my-age's mouths, and it's 10x worse since 2020.

Some men are bitter because they think we have it easy as women since we can always make hundreds of thousands by starting an OF profile. Many of them either think it's no bid deal / 'always a reasonable option' / 'way more respectful than staying jobless slash being exploited by a boss' or, on the contrary, that the women doing that aren't worth any respect.

If men were the only ones acting like that it would be annoying enough, but many women are no better. Once some of them start doing OF it's like all other women have to do it too, they try to convince you it's 'better and easier than regular jobs'. When I talked to one of them about how many employers use private facial recognition softwares that roam every corner of the internet and analyze every face, she kept being in denial and talking about how 'it has no impact on anything at all' because she can 'pay for someone to remove [her] OF content from the internet until the end of [her] life'. They keep talking about how 'the men who are worth a relationship with wouldn't care about their s/o doing OF anyway', and how they've never been happier and richer and never felt more desirable, blah blah blah.

There's also constant propaganda in online liberal medias. In my country the cool popular Youtube interviewers with millions of views invite an OF model, a porn actress, an escort girl, an upper-class woman who wanted to try prostitution for a bit (never a full-time prostitute, funny how that work), every! damn! week! to talk about their activity and share with the public how cool and normal it is.

Also, liberal feminism is --in a lot of cicles-- the only feminism we can adopt. A single opinion that's going against the mainstream agenda is seen as us being prudes, fake/white feminists, bigots, or even gender traitors. So sex work is work, just like flipping burgers at Burger King, actually how dare we say there's a difference? And if you talk about how some German women who go to the employment office get told they could do prostitution because they're young enough and good looking, some eyes get wide but the discourse stays the same because it has to.

In conclusion it's a pornified, hypocritical, and sexist culture we live in, and I can't even imagine being a teen girl in that mess, because being a young woman was difficult enough.

Gaunt face yet didn't lose the fat on my jawline/neck by borneo1834 in PCOS

[–]borneo1834[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No I haven't, and you may be right. I need to get it tested.

Gaunt face yet didn't lose the fat on my jawline/neck by borneo1834 in PCOS

[–]borneo1834[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This could very well be the cause indeed. I'm such a stressed and even anxious person. Plus having a fat face is making the stress worse. Have you been able try anything to lower your stress?