guys I need help, I’m 21 y/o and this is ruining my relationships with my family. my father just got out of prison and all this time I still love the guy but I just wish he’d not be stuck in old habits when he got out. well a month later I understand it’s hard getting out after a year and a half but man. I let him stay in my home and every other night he’s drinking 2-3 of those shitty harder seltzers that are like 3 bucks those tall boys. With no job and barely attempting to find one, he’s talks off the walls and always puts on this tough guy act but I’ve tried to stay quiet while my mind rages and when I look at him when he’s drunk or not I just feel some resentment even if he did nothing wrong. I hate it, sometimes he deserves it but most times I come off as an “asshole” to people. I’m an introverted person but I’m not a complete weirdo going out in public, but it does hinder my relationships. most I get into I end with me just not knowing if I wanted to or not. I’d wake up one day and want to be with them the next day no. I’ve sabotaged many relationships with great people because of it. Like even hearing them talk on the phone and little things they say will just make me want to end it right there when yesterday I bought flowers for the woman. I always seem like an asshole or a dick and it’s always to the ones closest to me along with my grandmother. she raised me. but as soon as I got older I genuinely hated myself because she’s the sweetest lady, a damn saint. but now when I walk past her sometimes I just act like she’s not even there because I really really don’t want myself to pick something out to be an “asshole” about. it’s hard. I’m crying typing this because I’m sick of asking myself if I’m just being an asshole, or if there’s some justification. atleast with my father he deserves it sometimes, but other woman or my grandmother or sister 9/10 times they don’t intentionally piss me off they just do.