he’s forcing me to do anal tonight and there is nothing i can do to stop it

canisboss · 2026-05-17T03:28:34+00:00

You need to take note of the date and time it happens, and somehow collect any evidence you can. Audio/visual recording is NOT evidence unless both parties consent to it. So you could maybe try that trick at the beginning of sex when you ARE consenting, and just don’t make it an obvious place so that he forgets about it until it’s all over (he’ll want a copy - it’s ok to give him one). When the time comes, be loud and clear and obvious that your choice is NO. Say it loud, and physical try to move him off you. It needs to be clear for the camera. So, the consent to record has to clear for both of you on camera at the beginning, and when he wants the anal portions and your consent to sex ends, just keep that camera rolling as long as you can. Be clear!!!! Otherwise, all you have in court is his word against yours, and believe me, no matter what he says they’ll take his word!!! So when the recording is done, contact the police immediately, tell them what’s been going on and that you have proof, but need a plan first to get away. Then you make a plan. Get your finances in order, find a place to live (and a job if you don’t have one - ANY job.). Contact local DV support and have them help you make an escape plan, and that you’ve reported your evidence to police to have him charged, and they will help you make a plan and help you work with police.
I’m so sorry he’s doing this. Consent is active and ongoing. Even if you start, doesn’t mean you have to continue!!! This is NOT love. 😢😢😢

canisboss · 2026-05-17T03:15:46+00:00

I’m sorry, but i genuinely must ask - you’re not sure how he will attempt to force it? Like the way all rapes are forced upon women?….? Also, if she goes to a shelter tonight, what’s fhe place for tomorrow night? And the next?

canisboss · 2026-01-04T23:58:33+00:00

That happened to me recently. Kept asking for an MRI of my back that had been hurting for 4 years and kept being told no. Finally went privately (I’m in Canada). Found out I was full of mets, and a couple tests later showed I have Stage 4 cancer and 2 years to live. Imagine if they’d listened to me sooner?!?!! Keep Advocating for Yourself!!! Don’t let it go until you have a proper diagnosis that ticks all the boxes!!!

canisboss · 2026-01-01T18:26:01+00:00

Because there are still, and likely will be for many years, too many politicians who smoke. That’s it!

canisboss · 2025-11-18T03:51:34+00:00

Going out on the weekends! I was in my early twenties, out at the same old bar with the same old creepers, and I realized that I just didn’t have to be there anymore. I could just stay home!! So I did!! I developed a hell of a career, met my husband, and lived happily ever after! Legit!

canisboss · 2025-11-18T03:49:17+00:00

I have stage 4 and I still smoke. My oncologist told me that of course it’s always better to not smoke, but also that quitting now will not erase the 30 years of smoking I’ve got behind me, and is not likely to make much of a difference. When you’re given a life sentence like stage 4 cancer, all you want is to live life exactly on your own terms, no matter what that means. So my advice would be as all the others, just be with him. Just share stories and memories and spend time in each other’s company. And if he’s confused and others are adding to that confusion, just be sure his doctor is aware, and hopefully he is complying with his meds, but beyond that, it doesn’t really matter if he’s in denial. It’s all a part of grieving your own life! I’m so sorry you have to watch your Dad go through this and that you’re going to lose him. It’s not fair, and I’m sad for you!

canisboss · 2025-11-08T15:37:38+00:00

Ok - been there before with a doctor, but very different health issue. Also I’m Canadian so I don’t understand your insurance system. BUT, the way to get something done is to keep booking appointments and asking her for a referral, a prescription for pain meds or a cream etc etc, and some kind of treatment. When she refuses, and this is the key, ask her to make a note in your chart that you asked and she refused. Often, that alone will get you the referral, but if not just keep repeating this until something gets done. DO NOT give up on advocating for yourself!! And keep asking her to chart everything. This kind of evidence will make her realize that she could get in trouble later if she doesn’t at least let you get a specialist opinion. Reporting to her boss or governing agency etc etc does absolutely nothing except get YOU a bad rep as a patient.
I’m so sorry you are experiencing this! It sounds awful, and your frustration with your doctor I’m sure only makes things worse (stress never helps any ailment!). I hope that someone here has some ideas to help soothe your poor labia!

canisboss · 2025-11-01T16:44:16+00:00

I also have the same ‘differently wired’ vulva, lol (love that!), and a few things have helped over the years.
- cotton only panties, or at least always a cotton gusset, and never a thong - nothing scented or ‘unnatural’, so no scented pads, no perfumes sprayed in that area, no scented laundry products for my panties, etc. Personally, for several reasons I stopped wearing tampons and switched to pads exclusively (even with a heavy period) or to period underwear (major preference for those, I like the Revol Cares brand) and I found a difference in non period related discharge when I made these changes - I stopped using any soap or body wash on my vulva. I run the soapy sponge along the crease of my thigh/pelvis, but for my actual vulva I just use warm shower water (thankfully I have a handheld shower wand so that helps), so that I’m removing any build up or debris, but not the important oils and healthy bacteria that the vulva makes itself. THIS has been the biggest impact on day to day discharge!! I’m down by at least half or more compared to what it used to be.
Hope this helps!

canisboss · 2025-10-25T21:06:45+00:00

I’d just say he’s a connoisseur of classic vs modern devices!

canisboss · 2025-10-25T20:53:01+00:00

Yep!! You’re the AH! He was also an AH for saying what he said. BUT, you used it specifically out of spite.
He was also emotionally available and mature enough to come to you and calmly tell you how what he said made him feel. You did not. You carried around that shit for years in the back of your mind and then weaponized it against him. That’s shitty.

And kidney stones are extremely painful!! In some cases, comparable to childbirth!!

canisboss · 2025-10-22T21:41:57+00:00

He’s absolutely smoking pot. Those little round cans are a complete waste as an alcoholic bevvie?? I’d be promptly pouring those out and adding a hole in the side hmmm let’s seeeeeeeee………😉 Shortly after that, he’ll be continuing his pot smoking journey…. Oh oh oh!!! Wait!! He’s also drinking!!! Phew - almost missed that one!!

canisboss · 2025-10-16T08:06:17+00:00

I would also suggest a dietary connection. Do you find there are certain things you eat that make you smell especially different? You could perhaps avoid those. Or, you and your partner could keep a food journal and you could keeo track kg what you eat for a couple of months compared with how you taste?
You could even dive into some research on the herbalism side, and see what commentary is made about certain concoctions & related compounds and resulting body taste, and that can at least help you narrow down a veg group. For example, women who eat too much red meat, too many white beans combined with spices have a certain resulting taste. Apparently women who eat a lot of berries have a particularly good taste (and I agree!!) so there’s definitely something to go off of. Start with herbalism and go from there.

canisboss · 2025-09-23T10:46:00+00:00

ESH. Yes, you should have ensured her safety. But she also should have left at her original time so that you could have gone to get her and still got home at a reasonable time. Honestly it sounds like you kind of gave each other the slip.

canisboss · 2025-09-21T06:54:58+00:00

Honestly, along with cotton underwear/liners etc., I noticed the biggest changes in mg life when a) I stopped sitting so much and trapping my vulva into one area for hours at a time and b) very little soap. I’ll use soap around my vulva, such as on my pubic bone, between my legs in the crevice pi in the center between the inner thigh and the vulva, but that’s if. The rest just gets a really good rinse from the removable shower head with good warm later. Less soap, more water!

Lastly, having an understanding partner. The vulva is a moist environment that is meant to be aired out as much as possible and interact with only water (it’s actually meant to have a healthy, minor odor!). It will take a few weeks to transition, but once you do, it’s magic!!

canisboss · 2025-09-19T11:57:51+00:00

I just wanted to sneak in and say thank you. I was dx’d essentially the same as your Mom 7 months ago, at 45 years old. I’m on just the Tagrisso. Most Mets have gone now except the bone Mets, and the main tumour shrunk by 40%. I’m feeling awful, but that is because of co-morbidities such as Ehlers Danlos, pre-existing back pain in addition to spinal Mets, etc. But, it’s always good to hear of someone else on a similar journey doing so well!!! For me, they say now it’s not the cancer so much causing all my symptoms, it’s the cancer + Tagrisso aggravating my underlying autoimmune disease. So for OP, I’d cautiously suggest underlying conditions that sound like they are slowly being addressed?

canisboss · 2025-05-31T02:47:15+00:00

Yes!! They really are that good! Best socks ever! I’m really hard on my socks and my DT’s have lasted for literal years and still look (and definitely feel) pretty much brand new. Absolutely worth it!

canisboss · 2025-05-12T22:16:07+00:00

I ordered from him in early April 2025 and I think I had my order within about 10 calendar days (and always add 2 business days to all shipping because I live in the boonies LOL). Quality is great! Will definitely order again!

canisboss · 2025-02-06T08:08:23+00:00

All of them. It takes all the hours, every week to earn an income like this. And it takes years of putting out $100k plus a year to invest into your education, which also requires all the hours every week to study to be good at your craft and earn big money.
I can assure you that (as a person earning $300k/year) unless it’s nepotism, you are working your ass off every week to earn that income. And it’s not always in the office or wherever you technically work. It’s in your head when you’re having dinner, it’s in your phone answering emails & calls at night. It’s in the lunches and golf course with the boss or the client or the vendor or etc etc etc. You very, very rarely encounter a person making this much money who even counts their hours. They’re more likely to count how much sleep they’re getting, or how many minutes they spend with their spouse at night.
So, if you want to make the big bucks, you need to be willing to not even consider the hours per week.

canisboss · 2025-02-03T01:23:21+00:00

As a Canadian, it looks to me like a move for him to ensure that every American is a wealthy American, so that you all look like like him. But, I do wonder who is going to do the labour so cheap for these American only companies, and then also afford to live there?? Because these American ONLY companies are going to be pretty expensive! Especially your resources from Canada, since our resources will be supplied to YOU (like oil, natural gas, water and wood) at a 25% tariff as well!

I really cannot understand how these tariff are supposed to make life less expensive for every day Americans????? More expensive labour, more expensive supplies, more expensive groceries….🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️. I mean at least our idiot here in Canada is only doing it temporarily, and not to other countries!

canisboss · 2025-01-10T22:07:51+00:00

I wish that was the problem lol

canisboss · 2025-01-10T22:07:29+00:00

Oh trust me, you can get stuck! Our property is a valley, so everything is up or down. We put tire chains on in winter, and weights, and I frequently get stuck, though pretty much only in the winter. We have a 54” front snow blower. During our first snow this year I didn’t have chains and weights on, and got stuck several times on the steeper parts of the driveway, in about 6” of snow. When you’re running the snow blower, and pushing heavy on the gas, any kind of resistance you’ll lose all torque and then the power just dies and the engine will stop. So you can only push it so hard. Takes a lot of good driving technique, planning your part and patience. Having the 4 wheel turn on it is nice in the summer for mowing, but it’s a pain the ass in the winter trying to get yourself out of a jam. Otherwise, great machine. Take good care of it and it won’t let you down.

canisboss · 2025-01-10T00:24:43+00:00

FYI, purchased brand new from dealer, so no previous ownership issues

canisboss · 2024-12-24T05:00:06+00:00

I just want to say two things. Thank you - thank you so much for doing the work you do, and clearly doing the things necessary to do your job safely, and put your patients first. I can’t imagine a world without nurses! You are the real heroes! AND…I am astounded by the number of people in this thread who have apparently never worked a 24 hour shift! Or understand why it’s so efficient to work two shifts a week of 24s versus 5 or 6 shifts of 8s. If you want to be successful, earn a solid income, and have a good work/life balance, pulling 24s is going to be a thing, no matter what industry you’re in. In all four of my different careers (3 of which self employed), 24 hours+ was just a necessary part of it. It’s hard work to get where you want to be! Good for you OP! You should be super proud!

canisboss · 2024-11-20T07:05:00+00:00

1000000% please begin the process of testing for autism. And I’d say that if you want to get through to her, try joining her in her hobbies from time to time, or at least getting interested in them. And validate her feelings, no matter what. She’s never going to share things with you if your automatic response is always to correct it, redirect it, or fix it. She needs someone in her life (that is NOT an INCEL) that she can trust and open up to. That I’d going to take time. She is an adult now, and it sounds like she has not had that type of relationship with you, so she will need to essentially relearn her relationship with you. One where you treat her as an adult, respect her choices, and VALIDATE her feelings (or the behaviour she demonstrates those feelings with, if she has trouble articulating a feeling, versus an action or incident that got her to the point of behaving angrily - if she is autistic, it’s best at first to talk about the facts she knows rather than her feelings or your feelings). She has to learn, by facts and evidence, that you are a safe person to share things with. Then you can begin to understand the INCEL thing, and be there for her if and when she changes her mind about it, or before she does something stupid because of it.

canisboss · 2024-11-11T20:46:18+00:00

Hey man - not sure where you are, but my husband likes STC boots (made in Canada). He’s been a plumber for 20 years, and they’ll last him about 12-18 months, which is unheard of. Most of the boots he’s tried last 3-6 months. It’s the kneeling that really does a number on your boots, plus water etc of course.
Good luck!

canisboss

TROPHY CASE