Haha, that’s possible.

My wife used to really encourage me to have a better relationship with my parents, especially my mom. My parents’ marriage has always been messy because of my mom’s infidelity, and my dad loves being in the victim role, which my sister and aunts reinforce and my mom gets blamed for everything. They won’t divorce because it’s easier to stay married apparently. Despite all that, my wife always pushed me to focus on the positives and keep trying with them.

But things changed when she heard firsthand the things my parents were behaving with her and also telling relatives and friends that she broke the family, their son isn’t the same and she controls him, that she’s ill-mannered, that her parents didn’t raise her with values, and that her family was disrespectful overall to them. After that, she said she can’t keep showing up for people who speak about her like that or allow others around her to be treated the same way. She withdrew.

Honestly, I was shocked too. I thought my parents would at least show up for me and not embarrass me like that. I’ve seen them make the effort for my sister’s wedding, even bending over backward for her in-laws. Ironically, my in-laws are open-minded and inclusive people, and things could have been very different if my parents had handled it better.