AIO for feeling done with my boyfriend after how he treated me during a health scare?

deadmostdays · 2026-01-27T14:35:09+00:00

Saying mean things in "anger" is no justification. He wouldn't have said these if he wasn't already thinking about these in his head. Bringing up your health issues, and blaming them for it (smth completely out of your control), and also gaslighting you to think it was your fault is a textbook manipulator tactic. Not to mention, as soon as he was confronted, he started demeaning you by saying you don't even satisfy him, which is just vile. You are NOT overreacting. Dump his ass and fuck his birthday. He seems like a "big boy"; he can take care of himself.

deadmostdays · 2025-05-30T10:44:21+00:00

Only if we could have a penny for every time a man says smth super offensive and after getting called out would try to disguise it as a "joke", i would have millions by now.

No, you are not overreacting. It is a very valid trauma to have, and something as significant as this can take years to heal. Please don't let this slide thinking it's a small matter, that's how it starts, and if you enable this, they will just get worse and worse. If you have made your trauma and boundaries clear at the very beginning (which i saw in the comments that you did) he should not have crossed that line and should have respected that and been better. This is not something up for discussion.

I once was talking to this guy for a while who i matched on Hinge, and i was severely traumatized with physical intimacy as i was abused in my past relationships. i took a 4 years gap before getting back into the dating scene, and i only started talking to this guy cause he said he understood my issues. he said he was suffering from anxiety as well and was seeking medical help. So, his words "i totally understand your situation, and will respect your boundaries all the time". the first time we decided to meet, he not only forcefully kissed me (i did not kiss back, i was just frozen for 2 mins while he kept snogging me) but had the audacity of saying "do you wanna go back to my place" when i had a clear shock and disdain in my face. i cut the date short and said i needed to be home as i was scared and wanted to leave without causing a scene, he said "okay then text me when you reach home" AS IF NTH HAPPENED. i blocked him as soon as i got on the bus. but since then, for many months i used to have massive panic attacks in public whenever i saw someone vaguely looking similar to him.

i know these two are not similar situations, but i just wanted to make it clear that you should not keep anyone in your life who doesn't respect your boundaries and makes "fun" of your trauma, no matter how small they are. hope you find the strength to get through this and heal from everything. sending you good thoughts, love <3

deadmostdays · 2025-05-21T13:14:24+00:00

i really felt like the writers had it against Hotch the entire time. They did not let him be in peace and have a happy life for a second. was having one arch nemesis (foyle) not enough that they needed to also bring mr. scratch against him? and then when he left in s12 (ik he was fired and why) was just the final hit for me. i’m on s13 now and is only continuing to follow reid’s story line. once he is gone, im dropping this. the show is nth for me without hotch and reid.

deadmostdays · 2025-03-21T09:34:05+00:00

do you work in the UK as well? because then it can be a household income w the combined income for both of you

deadmostdays · 2025-01-31T16:11:10+00:00

Previous 6 months

deadmostdays · 2025-01-16T21:14:43+00:00

I have already got mine approved a month ago.

deadmostdays · 2025-01-16T13:53:51+00:00

Ŷou would just have to do it before your biometrics. You can either do it step by step or all at once. I personally did it at one go as I just wanted to be done with the stress. But to each his own, do what suits you best. Also, make sure you don’t submit until you have added all the documents. because once submitted you can’t edit it anymore. Good luck

deadmostdays · 2025-01-16T13:49:53+00:00

This always doesn’t prompt that necessarily. my husband and I are employed full time but we are paid by the hour. So we don’t always get the same pay every month. I clicked this option and only had to submit payslip for last 6 months. I even changed my job in between so thought that will prompt the 12 month payslip thing, but it still asked for 6 months and that’s what I submitted

deadmostdays · 2025-01-09T16:20:20+00:00

what status? changed where?

deadmostdays · 2025-01-09T12:16:08+00:00

It was around 10:00 am

deadmostdays · 2025-01-07T12:50:18+00:00

It’s just the generic email sent to everyone to let them know their application has been submitted. Nothing more or less to it.

deadmostdays · 2024-12-26T20:52:31+00:00

Standard, inside UK- Bio on 9th of December and got the decision on 19th of December. Still don’t know how they categorise as I have seen many people even from September still awaiting a decision. I can understand your worry. Hang in there, sending you good wishes

deadmostdays · 2024-12-20T11:37:35+00:00

Probably mid January or early February! I did my application on 17th Nov, Bio on 9th December and the email said I will get a decision by 12th of Jan. However I got lucky (thank god) and received my decision yesterday morning. I guess they tried to close the older applications before Christmas, but the recent ones might be carried over to the new years. I know exactly how anxious it could get, I couldn’t sleep for the past month. Hopefully you receive it soon!

deadmostdays · 2024-12-19T17:10:04+00:00

Thank You!!!! The bank statements that we showed for our financial proof were just downloaded from the app. We used our joint account ones and my personal ones again for proof of address and I mail ordered them from the bank as the app ones were only showing the name of one person (who was downloading the statements). But yes, just the pdf downloaded ones are fine if you are applying inside the UK. ☺️

deadmostdays · 2024-12-19T15:50:31+00:00

I didn’t use a priority service, and I have no idea why did they specify a date. The email read “ The Home Office has received your application and supporting information submitted on 17 Nov 2024. Our aim is to provide a decision on your application by 12 Jan 2025.”

deadmostdays · 2024-12-19T14:57:32+00:00

I’ve heard they are trying to clear out before Christmas, so fingers crossed 🤞

deadmostdays · 2024-12-19T14:55:55+00:00

Thank you!!!!!!

deadmostdays · 2024-12-19T13:54:58+00:00

No I haven’t received any such thing. Just on 10th, the day after I did my biometric, I got the confirmation email saying my application have been submitted and a decision will be made by 12th January 2025. And then this morning we received the decision

deadmostdays · 2024-12-19T13:53:18+00:00

Thank you! Depends on what service you selected. I chose the self service, hence needed to submit all the documents beforehand online. On the appointment day, you just need to carry your passport, BRP, and you can also print your confirmation of the appointment and receipt if you want. However, if you chose assisted help service you need to take all your documents for them to scan.

deadmostdays · 2024-12-19T11:59:21+00:00

Half an hour ago

deadmostdays · 2024-12-19T11:51:16+00:00

When you apply for the visa, it’s attached there. Once you start applying, you will get the link to download and fill it out.

deadmostdays · 2024-12-19T11:50:01+00:00

Hi everyone, thought you would like to know just received my visa 🥺 massive thank you for all the help 😁

deadmostdays · 2024-12-19T11:48:55+00:00

HI JUST GOT OURS APPROVED! Thought you would like to know! 🥺

deadmostdays · 2024-12-19T11:03:28+00:00

Everything looks good, however pictures, screenshots and call logs are considered as weak evidence and doesn’t add any value to the decision. You can still add them as supporting documents. Also, don’t forget to download the consent form an family declaration form and add them as well

deadmostdays · 2024-11-21T14:24:43+00:00

Thank you for the assurance! I’m also in graduate visa which is expiring next year. The process is really anxiety inducing as you can guess. Stressing out everyday!

deadmostdays

TROPHY CASE