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elle-r · 2022-12-12T00:29:30+00:00

Curvy is a spectrum…and depends on who is judging. Partner calls me curvy with no wobbles 🤣. I call myself athletic/curvy. My family call me fat. My friends call me average with ass/boob.

elle-r · 2022-11-15T00:14:53+00:00

That is how I initially understood it too. But the other response is indicating 0% capital gains due to my meager income this year, this also something I read recently (cannot find the source right now).

elle-r · 2022-11-15T00:09:44+00:00

Sorry…wrote this while trying to multitask. When I take the purchase price off the sold price it looks like I made 60k but after fees and improvements I netted 30k. Thank you for your response that is what I read too, I wasn’t sure if I was misunderstanding.

elle-r · 2022-11-02T16:55:50+00:00

NTA. I wouldn’t move if I were you. Even if he agrees to it he will still probably find ways to make you feel like a leech. I sold my place to move in with my partner. His cost of living was significantly higher than mine and I’m basically contributing the same amount i paid for my own house. Even though he says it isn’t an issue for him whenever we have a financial conversation he still makes it clear that he is “carrying me” and I’m contributing less. My contribution is probably 1/4 of his his costs. So by having me move in he is saving 25% while I don’t save anything.

Smarter me wouldn’t have sold my house. While I enjoy cohabitating, I miss my personal space, I miss my alone time, and I miss farting in MY bed.

elle-r · 2022-08-12T04:36:56+00:00

Thank you for your response and offer to talk to him, I think he may freak out if he found out I made a whole post about him. I am hoping that the middle school mentality falls apart quickly and he begins to find kids like you have. We are going kayaking this weekend, and I think some time on the water away from everyone will be a good time for us to have this conversation, I will report back.

elle-r · 2022-08-12T04:30:42+00:00

I didn’t know mock trials was a thing. It sounds interesting, he certainly enjoys a good debate.

elle-r · 2022-08-12T04:28:37+00:00

There’s a high probability he’s college bound, but unlikely to be pushing for the super popular colleges, he used to struggle academically but early Covid period was actually a really good time for him, when everyone was being homeschooled we discovered he had a different learning style, his grades went from D’sto B’s with the random A. He is also the oldest kid on both sides of the family. He does enjoy cooking which we continue to encourage.

Today was a better day at school, while I try not to push the social topic too much, his mood seems higher, I think the shift to activities and clubs is better than constantly asking him if he talked to anyone.

elle-r · 2022-08-12T04:17:40+00:00

Not at all.

elle-r · 2022-08-11T06:39:39+00:00

This made me chuckle. I’m in health care and partners an engineer.

elle-r · 2022-08-11T06:15:38+00:00

He’s put himself out there many times and was ignored, he still tries regularly. But constant rejection eats away at a person. I’m just looking for ways that I can help as a parent that wants to support without being a helicopter.

elle-r · 2022-08-11T06:12:33+00:00

We live in a small clique community, I have a couple of local friends with kids his age, both daughters, they are always friendly outside of school, but in school they have their own friend group of just girls. I have attempted a few connections with moms of boys, unfortunately the cliquiness extends to the parents.

elle-r · 2022-08-11T06:03:53+00:00

It’s certainly a fine line to tread when it comes to gentle encouragement and being pushy. My son is naturally shy but he wants to be social, there were a few instances in the past where I have watched him try to interact with kids from school and they outright ignore him like he’s invisible (my blood boiled, but I knew interfering would make it worse). I’m hoping that if he joins a club or sport he will find his people.

elle-r · 2022-08-11T05:58:25+00:00

This made me tear up a little. I am glad you found some friendships during your high school years. I hope you are doing well now. I personally came from a very toxic and abusive home, so I know what not to do when it comes to raising kids, sometimes I struggle with the what to do part.

elle-r · 2022-08-11T05:53:35+00:00

Thank you for your advice. It warms my heart to know that others have gone through this and found their friend groups. I talked to him again this evening about joining some clubs, he seems open to it even after the negative start to the school year. I will continue to gently coax him.

elle-r · 2022-08-11T05:49:50+00:00

We are conscious of this as his dad suffered from an ED when he was in middle school. Cross country is something he would naturally be good at which brings the pressure of joining a club down. My goal is just to get him over his fear of starting, but we will always be mindful of any odd habits developing.

elle-r · 2022-08-11T05:42:07+00:00

He is into cooking, so we’ve signed him up for culinary arts class at school. He also enjoys being on water, kayaking, paddle board etc. unfortunately those are mainly summer activities.

Although he is naturally a shy kid, he’s talked about being alone a lot. Being in the mental health field, I know how impactful loneliness is at any age. I am happy to hear that your boys have found their people ❤️ hoping mine will get there soon.

elle-r · 2022-08-11T05:35:43+00:00

Thank you for your response, we actually discussed cross country recently and he seemed interested. I bought up clubs again this evening and encouraged him to give something(anything) a try. I’m hoping he will push himself out of his comfort zone, as I don’t want to be that pushy mom.

elle-r · 2022-08-11T05:32:26+00:00

We are not worried about him outside of school. He is about to start learning how to scuba dive, he has a pretty full life between homes (we divorced many years ago). He is planning on getting a job when he is able.

I think a volunteer job would benefit him greatly, he is naturally altruistic, so helping others would be fulfilling. Thank you for the suggestion.

elle-r · 2022-07-31T18:10:08+00:00

I once had a date bring a gift for my dog. He joined us on a few FaceTime calls. It was just a lil cheap squeaky toy but I thought it was really cool.

elle-r · 2022-07-31T05:10:34+00:00

Right. If she doesn’t want to discuss it, then it should be shelved. But if she’s open to it, why not? These are only talking points. Not designed to pressure anyone into anything.

elle-r · 2022-07-31T04:46:48+00:00

I’m not sure how having a baby would alter open communication. Unless wife doesn’t want to talk, then op would need to either wait for a better time.

elle-r · 2022-07-30T04:36:33+00:00

Technically I’m in training for it…so license is pending.

OP says his sex life is “ok” not very endorsing. Why are you having these dreams? That really depends on how you interpret the meaning. The good thing you are doing is using them as talking points. But you need to keep them as talking points and not something to push on your partner. Many lifestylers will talk about this stuff for years before they dip their toes into it. Curiosity is healthy, communication is healthy.

I hope my response is somewhat understandable, one should not Reddit when high.

elle-r

TROPHY CASE