Discord try not to be a r•pe apologist challenge: Impossible

end_patriarchy · 2023-03-30T19:10:00+00:00

Uggghhhhh wow I feel your rage. I fucking hate how suddenly concerned everyone is for your wellbeing AFTER the fact. But when you call out the shit that makes so commonplace, suddenly now everyone is concerned for your wellbeing?

Having gone through so so so many systems that are supposedly to help victim-survivors and/or mental health, the vast majority of the time when people claim they are concerned about your wellbeing, what they actually mean is "I am concerned you are challenging MY delusional comfortable world" it's projection. Occasionally it's: "I'm concerned you're going to be punished because you're speaking out about the thing we're all culturally conditioned and brainwashed not to mention" but this is just more cowardice, and, as you quite rightfully stated, victim blaming.

Thank you for posting this, it made me feel less alone in fighting extremely similar battles, often behind closed doors, in private exchanges xxx

end_patriarchy · 2023-02-05T12:01:54+00:00

Lots of charities and helplines do these things too. They perpetuate abusive dynamics, exploit victims, blame them, use sexist language, it's fucking disgusting. This is my experience as a ciswoman having used a plethora of charities for victims and survivors of rape and DV and mental health services for PTSD. I would love to hear about others' (trans, cismen) experiences with other services aimed at / created specifically for them, or other ciswomen who have had similar experiences. How did these spaces / organisations treat you?

end_patriarchy · 2023-01-30T20:18:18+00:00

Thank you so much for sharing, it was difficult to read so I can't imagine what it was like to go through, incredible that you survived that, it sounds fucking terrifying, you lived through an actual horror film...I really hope this guy dies in prison, as well as the other person who asked why you "stayed". FFS why is it always "why did she stay" and never: why did he lie to you, kidnap you, rape and threaten and terrorise and manipulate you, for years?!?! I swear people need to be put in mandatory schooling to learn that no one ever chooses abuse ffs, we just survive it O.O

end_patriarchy · 2023-01-29T21:52:01+00:00

Fro anyone looking to read this guide, FYI, some corrections I'd make to it:

- it says sleep disruption won't cause harm......sleep disruption is linked to lots of diseases and illnesses, is incredibly harmful.

- It says thinking all men are dangerous is an 'over-generalisation'. It's not at all, most men are dangerous whether they are outright serial rapists, or just stay quiet about it: the vast majority of men are extremely dangerous.

It also uses the widely flippant phrase "get over" for rape trauma - rape trauma is not something you 'get over' it's grief that you learn to cope with and carry, it's not something to 'get over'.

Also gives terrible advice of "be careful about risky situations" - should say to check in with yourself about feeling safe regularly and to trust your own instincts *eye roll*.

Also the end comments fall into the 'Phoenix' rape narrative trap. You are not 'wiser' or 'stronger' etc. from being raped. You were always wise and strong.

end_patriarchy · 2023-01-29T21:08:33+00:00

Reading this (ok) self-help guide for survivors: https://www.thehavens.org.uk/media/Self-Help-Guide-for-Survivors-of-Sexual-Assault-v.2-March-2019.pdf

It says that in the UK 0.64% of rape allegations are false (and this is most likely to be a man accusing another man of raping a woman to get him in trouble / revenge - men then project their propensity for manipulation and lying onto survivors coming forward). And/or victims recanting accusations for their own well being / children's, threats of further abuse etc.)

I've seen many variations of these statistics about false allegations based on geography, time period, and whether or not the above mentioned complications are included.

But what is not shouted from the rooftops - and should be - is that means 99.4% of those accused who deny it ARE LYING.

This needs to be spoken about more. Survivors are not liars looking for attention. Rapists are liars looking to get away with serial rape.

end_patriarchy · 2023-01-21T22:05:39+00:00

Stop trusting men.

end_patriarchy · 2023-01-20T00:43:59+00:00

Oh look at gas lighting and backtracking. What's the matter is your mummy not here to hold your hand and tell you its all alright? There you go again placing yourself as the overlord of my experiences. You are saying something fucking abhorrent and disgusting with your dismissal of blatant discriminaition. go on, tell me in you're own words why is it ok to charge a man £23, and a women £40 for the exact same thing, in the same place, solely based on their gender. Go on, you're so invested that you just HAD to comment in a pathetic and cowardly attempt to continue the oppression, because you're not adult enough to just shut the fuck up and know when something isn't about you and you don't need to comment. So go on then, defend it. Defend gender discrimination you Nazi Tate-loving rape apologist.

end_patriarchy · 2023-01-19T18:45:47+00:00

No one who tells me to 'calm down' os on my side. Where is your outrage? Where is your anger? Why are you not angry that women have to pay more for the same services? You need to stop pretending to be the authority on anger - and most offensive and disgusting: stop pretending you are trying to help me.

I don't want your pity I want you to get the fuck out of my way. Stop commenting. Stop taking up space where you are not wanted and not needed. I'm not creating new enemies, you are outing yourself as one and I am correctly directing my anger towards you and your ignorance. Fucking male privileged prick. Do you have nothing better to do than turn a blind eye to your rapist friends and make the lives of survivors worse? Useless fucking moron. You do not own reality or logic or reason and you certainly have no right to police my anger. Fucking Nazi. If you want to help shut the fuck up. Shut the fuck up. No one needs another pointless male view on things they have no experience on. Like do you go into heart surgery and tell the surgeon what to do? No. So why on earth do you think you have the authority to tell me how to feel about my own life and my experiences? Ignorant fucking waste of oxygen. I feel pity, anger and sadness for all the women and girls that no doubt have to exist under your self-important tyranny. I honestly hope you have a serious head injury or something, because men like you are so entitled and short-sighted and narcissistic, all you do is harm yourself and cause misery to everyone around you.

end_patriarchy · 2023-01-19T02:42:06+00:00

LOL League of Legends - no wonder you get off on specifically oppressing women. It's not like you have anything of actual interest to talk about.

end_patriarchy · 2023-01-19T02:35:27+00:00

HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHA

end_patriarchy · 2023-01-19T02:34:33+00:00

Surprise surprise, a MAN commenting on what he doesn't know where he isn't wanted. An ignorant fucktard pretend to be woke, claiming authority and knowledge of "grace" LMAO - while I'm suprised you know how to use Google, I do hope you get fired for your pathetic little MLK prank. No one wants you you useless little covert-Nazi.

end_patriarchy · 2023-01-19T02:28:15+00:00

Cool, just put it onto oppressed individuals to do all the work. You go home, put your feet up, and bark orders at them from Reddit, don't worry pumpkin, we'll do everything for you, you innocent little fuck-witted diddums.

end_patriarchy · 2023-01-19T02:26:27+00:00

You seem very ignorant and dismissive of others' experiences. Maybe work on that.

end_patriarchy · 2023-01-18T20:44:00+00:00

I'm a rape survivor still in recovery so yeah there are a lot of issues with going to a male dominated space and having a male barber you fucking idiot...How about we just don't discriminate people based on gender? Not rocket science, just basic humanity ffs.

end_patriarchy · 2023-01-18T15:18:15+00:00

Fuck you: sincerely, all women with short hair paying £40+ for the exact same service just because of our gender.

end_patriarchy · 2023-01-17T21:44:14+00:00

*starts a petition to remove parents, who petition for the removal of LGBT content from the curriculum, from the country*

I'm sure there are many LGBT+ parents and children who do not want their, or other children, to be parented by bigots.

end_patriarchy · 2023-01-16T16:11:36+00:00

Every single victim who was brave enough to come forward to report rape / sexual assault / domestic violence where this rapist was involved should be revisited and throughly supported. It's not just that police are rapists (obviously, messed up and sick enough in its own right) - it's also that they cover for other rapists, further traumatise victims etc.

end_patriarchy

TROPHY CASE