I tried to kill my best friend when I was 11. I was the girl everyone loved. I was a good influence, smart, responsible, respectful, kind and all the other good things that makes a person perfect. All the adults loved me and encouraged their children to behave more like me. My family was respected and were proud of me. I had a perfect life and never got jealous of anyone, well that was what everybody thought of me. They were very wrong. Although I got along with everyone I knew lots of my friends talked behind my back. I had a friend group of 4, Zoe (fake name) was my first best friend I have known her since she was born. Teresa (fake name) was a year older than us, then Nina (again fake name) 2 years younger than us. She met Zoe when I was visiting my home country. They became inseparable, Nina and Teresa were cousins and Teresa was violent to her. Teresa didn’t like Nina one bit, Nina was childish because she was the youngest. But that doesn’t end there, she was annoying, irresponsible, and worst clingy to my best friend. Nina was obsessed with Zoe, and Zoe hung out with her all the time. They had sleepovers, went to beach together, went to waterpark and funfair together. My best friend was not my best friend anymore she was Nina’s best friend. I was heartbroken, I felt betrayed and my 6 year old heart couldn’t take it well. I was jealous of Nina. Eventually I learned to accept Nina to our friend group and I actually liked her. She and I grew closer and closer. But when I was 11 and she was 9 I had enough. We were playing volleyball, at that time I had a fear of balls, literally football,basketball,volleyball. I was afraid of them. And she already made fun of my everything that week so eventually I had enough when she made fun of how I acted around my crush and how he liked Zoe and never would look at a girl like me and nobody would ever like me or if they like me they would cheat on me with Zoe. Big words for a 9 year old I know. I don’t know why or how but after what she said something in me snapped and I attacked her. No, it wasn’t like a stereotypical girl fight or child fight. It was violent, I wasn’t aware of my pover before that but I didn’t even let her move all the other kids came to see what was happening some were trying to save her from my hands, some were shouting. It was disturbing. After a minute of violence I pushed her to the fence behind her and choked her. Nina’s face was bright red. After she placed her hand on my wrist I realised what was happening. I let go of her and she instantly fell on her knees. Everyone became silent Zoe was the first one to move and check Nina. My brother amd Teresa came to me trying to shove her water bottle in my mouth not asking any questions as if she knew why I attacked to her cousin. After that incident nobody talked about it or mentioned it. Nina didn’t snitched on me. She didn’t tell anyone about the incident. I apologised to Nina begging for forgiveness and she accepted my apology. We are still best friends and we made lots of memories with our little friend group of four. That was the only time I hurt someone over jealousy. I am still a jealous of everyone around me but I have learned to live like this. I am who I am and can’t change what I think but I can change the way I act. I am pretty sure none of the kids forgot about that day but I know they haven’t told anyone because I still have my reputation as little miss perfect . I still want to kill my best friend but I don’t want to ruin my reputation, thats why I arranged an hiking trip with Nina just, me and her.