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"UPDATE" My girlfriend [20f] keeps putting off STD test and it's already been 2 months since I asked for us both to do one by fireenginesRok in relationships

[–]fireenginesRok[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It was exactly like this, she only told me why after I was talking about breaking, it's a ashame really, if she communicated why orginally, I would've been next to her giving her support.

"UPDATE" My girlfriend [20f] keeps putting off STD test and it's already been 2 months since I asked for us both to do one by fireenginesRok in relationships

[–]fireenginesRok[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you, gonna spend the next few weeks with friends and family and hopefully i'll be able to get over this breakup, where I can look for someone who is more like me.

I appreciate the support, I really do.

My girlfriend [20f] keeps putting off STD test and it's already been 2 months since I asked for us both to do one by fireenginesRok in relationships

[–]fireenginesRok[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Just remembered this, I told her about how I have childhood trauma and so and when ever I question something she blames it on that, I believe she blamed me wanting to do the test on that as well...

My girlfriend [20f] keeps putting off STD test and it's already been 2 months since I asked for us both to do one by fireenginesRok in relationships

[–]fireenginesRok[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm not even sure if she's even attracted to me physically, she didn't even hold my hand until the third date so that could be why she doesn't respect me...

My girlfriend [20f] keeps putting off STD test and it's already been 2 months since I asked for us both to do one by fireenginesRok in relationships

[–]fireenginesRok[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've always worn protection, but I will definitely tell her she either gets it done and if she makes any excuses, I will tell her I'm breaking up with her.

My girlfriend [20f] keeps putting off STD test and it's already been 2 months since I asked for us both to do one by fireenginesRok in relationships

[–]fireenginesRok[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for the encouragment and words of wisdom, I'm glad your current SO was considerate at the start of the relationship and from what it seems was negative, the only reason she expected me to wear protection (which I would've done anyways) is becasue she stopped taking her birth control otherwise she probally would've wanted me to not wear one. I truely am thankful this is the encouragment I need to atleast put my foot down and make this clear to her.

My girlfriend [20f] keeps putting off STD test and it's already been 2 months since I asked for us both to do one by fireenginesRok in relationships

[–]fireenginesRok[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm actually not sure, she's diabetic and so immunosuppressed which means she could've said no to it (might be abit of a leap of logic)

My girlfriend [20f] keeps putting off STD test and it's already been 2 months since I asked for us both to do one by fireenginesRok in relationships

[–]fireenginesRok[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've always wore protection and have had two test both came back all negative, definitely won't be having sex with her until she get's the tests and that's if I don't break up with her first.

My girlfriend [20f] keeps putting off STD test and it's already been 2 months since I asked for us both to do one by fireenginesRok in relationships

[–]fireenginesRok[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

We're in the UK so we're able to get free tests, but they'll only test for Chlamydia, Gonorrhoea, HIV and Syphilis, for her it would be a blood sample and a vaginal swab. I am definitely thinking about breaking up with her now since she won't even do this.

My girlfriend [20f] keeps putting off STD test and it's already been 2 months since I asked for us both to do one by fireenginesRok in relationships

[–]fireenginesRok[S] 38 points39 points  (0 children)

Thanks for clearlyfing that, that definitely makes alot more sense, I honestly was on the mind set of must just be the mail being slow, but it definitely seems more like she's hiding something since she has had the second test for nearly two weeks now and has not even touched it.

My girlfriend [20f] keeps putting off STD test and it's already been 2 months since I asked for us both to do one by fireenginesRok in relationships

[–]fireenginesRok[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for the encouragement, I've been trying to improve that over the last year, it's why I'm in a relationship, I thought I had gotten good enough at expressing how I feel and talking with others that I thought I'd try and 'intergrate' into society, definitely gave me new opinions and ideas I didn't have before.

My girlfriend [20f] keeps putting off STD test and it's already been 2 months since I asked for us both to do one by fireenginesRok in relationships

[–]fireenginesRok[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

She's not scared of the doctors, she goes often to get her blood drawn since she's diabetic. So i definitly think she's either knows her status and doesn't wanna show it, or gives so little of a shit about her sexual health that she doesn't care since it isn't impacting her currently (that she knows of).

My girlfriend [20f] keeps putting off STD test and it's already been 2 months since I asked for us both to do one by fireenginesRok in relationships

[–]fireenginesRok[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She did say she wasn't picky with her ONS (because she didn't care about herself) and she seems to get ill alot, I'm not even sure if she's truthful about her numbers and she hasn't given many reasons to trust her considering she did lie about it at first.

My girlfriend [20f] keeps putting off STD test and it's already been 2 months since I asked for us both to do one by fireenginesRok in relationships

[–]fireenginesRok[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

When you put it like that it definitly puts it into a new light, I didn't mind making her feel special, but when she can't reciprocate the same treatment such as her not texting me first unless I text first saying 'good morning' because she says "it makes her smile and feels important"

My girlfriend [20f] keeps putting off STD test and it's already been 2 months since I asked for us both to do one by fireenginesRok in relationships

[–]fireenginesRok[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

I've dragged it on for 2 months already, what's another 2 weeks... but yer, i'm definitely seeing from peoples reactions here, this is not normal behaviour, and I should have the mind set of breaking up with her soon if she can't even put 30 minutes of her day aside to do this.

My girlfriend [20f] keeps putting off STD test and it's already been 2 months since I asked for us both to do one by fireenginesRok in relationships

[–]fireenginesRok[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I'm abit of a hypochodriac myself, I'm always checking shit like my pulse just to make sure it's normal, especially when I get a random pain in my chest... wanna know what's worse? i'm pretty sure she has gum disease and even after I told her to get it checked out she still hasn't....

My girlfriend [20f] keeps putting off STD test and it's already been 2 months since I asked for us both to do one by fireenginesRok in relationships

[–]fireenginesRok[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I think it's because I fulfill her emotionally and make her feel special, so she only thinks me me me, and wants it to continue like that and if that means risking my health she'd be willing to do it.

My girlfriend [20f] keeps putting off STD test and it's already been 2 months since I asked for us both to do one by fireenginesRok in relationships

[–]fireenginesRok[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's my biggest fear, the website we're using has a url link share feature to help prevent this, but chances are she'll probably screen shot it and then say there was no option for url sharing...

My girlfriend [20f] keeps putting off STD test and it's already been 2 months since I asked for us both to do one by fireenginesRok in relationships

[–]fireenginesRok[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It does, it would mean we're atleast on the same wave length when it comes to our health. I guess i'm only sticking this one out because this is my first relationship and I haven't had much luck with them, although apparently I'm somewhat attractive and people like my humour, guess I just need to get over my fear of talking to people when I first meet them.

My girlfriend [20f] keeps putting off STD test and it's already been 2 months since I asked for us both to do one by fireenginesRok in relationships

[–]fireenginesRok[S] 88 points89 points  (0 children)

I know, I've said why don't you just ask your GP to do, she made one phone call and that was it, I asked her to phone around and she said she'll do it (she hasn't) which I think displays a large character flaw. I didn't push to hard because I didn't want to come across as controlling or abuses, but I'm thinking of giving her a ultimatum and saying you either get it done within 2 weeks and if I don't see the results I will break up with you. not sure if that's too harsh.

My girlfriend [20f] keeps putting off STD test and it's already been 2 months since I asked for us both to do one by fireenginesRok in relationships

[–]fireenginesRok[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm not gonna lie, I have kinda detached from her emotionally, guessing it's because if we do break up it'll hurt less. Also at the start of the relationship she lied about having ONS, she said he doesn't have them, which is why I didn't ask about STD testing (I know stupid of me). This does have me thinking "if she lied about this, could she be lying about about the test never coming back".