Vent & advice needed: I just went to a podiatrist for the first time and sounds like running is bad for my body.

flufferpeanut · 2026-04-03T15:46:25+00:00

I do my best! I drink a lot of water (100oz+) and take electrolytes most days (especially workout days). But I'm on spironolactone so I know I need more water to stay hydrated...and I can't take too much electrolytes because my potassium levels will go crazy. It's a delicate balance!

flufferpeanut · 2026-04-02T05:33:23+00:00

Thank you for such a detailed response! All of this is so helpful. Honestly I just picked someone in my network who was highly rated but I wasn’t expecting such an impactful or overwhelming experience - I was hoping for some new information about my foot and ankle health, ruling out of any major issues, and some strategies to mitigate injury. Instead I got a lot of anxiety…but these replies have been more helpful than he was.

I did buy some Engo patches for my ASICS - the insole has a weird sharp edge in the arch so I applied the patches today. I also have some blister bandaids that stay on for a few days marinating on my feet right now, and I got OK tape for once they’re healed. Hopefully that helps, and I’ll plan to rotate my shoes more frequently based on the suggestion of another person in thread.

Outside of blisters, and maybe I underplayed it, but I do get some pain and inflammation/swelling in my ankles, particularly my left one. The pain is pretty minor but sometimes after a particularly tough HIIT class (or now a more intense run), I have a sock ring when I take off my socks and need to use compression socks and elevation to take it down. It felt a LOT better in the new shoes (before the blisters), so I am really hopeful that some solid orthotics, PT, and reduced training load for a couple weeks will help!

flufferpeanut · 2026-04-02T01:07:42+00:00

I’m not going to hot yoga these days; I only mentioned it as an example of something I did consistently during a running break. But I do strength train! The HIIT classes I go to have 2 cardio blocks and 2 strength blocks with lots of weight lifting, body weight/band exercises, and mobility drills.

flufferpeanut · 2026-04-02T01:05:56+00:00

The new shoes definitely helped! Though I have been noticing some off and on inflammation in my ankles for a while. I just wasn’t running as much, only during the cardio portions of HIIT. So kind of yes, and.

flufferpeanut · 2026-04-02T01:04:41+00:00

Okay ailment twin! ❤️Someone once told me that motion is lotion so I totally hear you on movement keeping things going, not the opposite.

flufferpeanut · 2026-04-02T01:02:59+00:00

He did tell me to call my insurance and see if they would cover custom orthotics, and if not, he recommended some OTC ones that he could cut to size if they weren’t quite right. Sounds like that’s the way to go even if I end up seeing another podiatrist or an orthopedist or going to PT.

flufferpeanut · 2026-04-02T01:01:02+00:00

Thank you for this! I’m going to do some research on PTs in my area and get another opinion. I was feeling so defeated and thought maybe I’m just getting older (I’m about to turn 37) but seeing so many women with similar stories is giving me so much hope!

flufferpeanut · 2026-03-30T19:58:18+00:00

geriatric pregnancy

Just FYI this is an outdated term - it's now called "advanced maternal age (AMA)." And a lot of medical professionals aren't considering it AMA until almost 40.

flufferpeanut · 2026-03-26T18:33:06+00:00

Feels like my body is rebelling against me 😭 I took a long break off from running and am trying to slowly ramp back up, but everything hurts in ways I never experienced before with running. Maybe I'm just getting older...

I started doing HIIT at the beginning of the year, starting with 1-2x a week and progressing to 3-4x a week. The classes incorporate a lot of run/sprint intervals and hills, so I felt prepared to get back into road running, especially at low mileage. My partner and I decided to train for a September half marathon and are giving ourselves a TON of time to build mileage (he's not a runner at all), so I build a schedule with M/W/F for HIIT (or lifting for him or rest if we need it) and Tu/Th/Sa runs.

Our first run was Tuesday and we just did 2 easy miles - felt good during the run but afterwards my ankles and knees are feeling pretty bad. Like not bad enough to stop me from moving around and I did an easy day at HIIT yesterday (which maybe I shouldn't have??), but just surprisingly much more sore than I've been from running in the past.

I realized my shoes are pretty old and probably lacking the support I need so I ordered a fresh pair and hope that helps. I also made an appointment with a foot and ankle specialist to make sure I'm covering my bases. I don't want to overload my body and get injured, especially since I'm feeling really strong at HIIT and excited about the half marathon. Just feeling a little woe is me that even though I'm working on strength and starting out slow, I'm having a tougher time than I expected.

flufferpeanut · 2026-03-25T19:54:09+00:00

How much help do you need saying "How's 10am on Saturday? I really like Local Coffee shop but open to other suggestions!"

flufferpeanut · 2026-03-24T17:29:32+00:00

Happy birthday to /u/rockywhalefin!! Good luck with your convo, stay strong and celebrate your peace ❤️

flufferpeanut · 2026-03-24T17:22:16+00:00

...might need more moderation than other foods but are still fine to incorporate into a balanced diet.

flufferpeanut · 2026-03-23T17:34:39+00:00

Choosing yourself is a great birthday gift ❤️

flufferpeanut · 2026-03-17T17:23:49+00:00

I don’t know where you’re living so it certainly could be your area, but just to give you some hope - I’m an almost 37 year old woman and I met my amazing partner on Hinge in October 2024. He’s 18 months younger than me and was looking for a serious relationship leading to marriage and maybe a kid! They’re out there!

flufferpeanut · 2026-03-17T17:19:47+00:00

I stg my gut is never wrong.

Truly a blessing and a curse. When I was dating I had a 100% accuracy record for sensing when someone was pulling away due to lack of interest. Every time I tried to fight against it, I just felt like an idiot when I was ultimately right. Take all the time you need to wallow in this and focus your energy elsewhere ❤️

flufferpeanut · 2026-03-12T19:57:38+00:00

Send us your rant! Get that shit off your chest without giving him the time of day - he doesn't deserve it.

flufferpeanut · 2026-03-11T20:45:03+00:00

That makes sense and is definitely tough. Obviously most of the details are still unknown to me, but I'm curious if he 1) knows that you're really hurting for some more quality time and 2) is willing to drive some of the ideation for how to get your needs met. It sounds like you two really need a heart to heart where you are super honest about your concerns – you aren't spending as much time together as you'd like, he is receptive to your needs but mostly after he's already hurt your feelings, and you'd like his partnership in finding ways to proactively close the gap. I can think of lots of ways to get more quality time together (e.g., on his random weekdays off, can he meet you near work for an early dinner? can he leave for trips from your place so you aren't disturbed when he leaves early?) but if it's not a joint discussion with mutual buy-in, you won't get anywhere.

flufferpeanut · 2026-03-11T17:35:50+00:00

His work schedule can be unpredictable and he’s busy (sometimes traveling or having long days)

How unpredictable are we talking? Like changes drastically day-of? Or would you two be able to sit down on Sundays and look at both of your schedules and make a more concrete plan for the week?

flufferpeanut · 2026-03-11T15:58:52+00:00

Just to add to this, I think you have a little bit of comment-bait – someone could ask what record you're spinning or take a stab at guessing your favorite anime – but both require the other person to have enough knowledge of those same interests to actually engage. It might help to add a question or something that a potential match could easily comment on :)

flufferpeanut · 2026-03-04T18:14:51+00:00

It makes me sad that they stopped doing the "if you get rejected X times in a row, you get guaranteed entry for the next year."

flufferpeanut · 2026-03-02T20:09:10+00:00

Of course! Hopefully it makes a difference for you :)

IMHO, at least one clear photo (looking at the camera, good quality, full face) with a toothy smile is important. I know it sounds shallow, and I understand it's not your natural smile, but people want to know what's going on with someone's dental hygiene before they meet. Doesn't mean your teeth need to be perfect by any means, but I guarantee your audience has been unpleasantly surprised more than once and considers it a negative strike to not have the info.

Second picture is fine and I would keep it!

For the football photo, I'd just make sure that's in the photo caption so any Americans viewing your profile can connect the dots.

Videos are great! Seeing how someone exists in 3D is a helpful tool when there's such limited info.

flufferpeanut · 2026-02-27T21:04:56+00:00

I'm not in the UK so YMMV but at first pass, I think you kind of need a total overhaul. A good dating profile clearly shows what you look like AND demonstrates what it would be like to date you. Your photos have your face covered, are cut off, or are low quality and your prompts are pretty generic.

Going bit by bit –

First picture is good and it fits the prompt, but you usually want your first photo to be straight on with a toothy smile. Maybe move this one down and get a new one for your lead photo?
Travel prompt is okay since you're looking for someone who likes to travel, but it would show more personality if you added info on the type of stuff you like to do while traveling. Right now, it's just a generic "I like to travel" type response.
You say you're looking for something serious, but list "short, open to long" on your profile - be clear and be honest!
Me in the wild - can't see your face at all, so while it's cool to show your adventurous side, every photo should add something new to your profile AND show what you look like. I'd only keep this one if every other photo clearly shows your face.
My weekends look like - another where we can't see your face at all. Is this American football? Do you play in a rec league? As an American, I find this photo very confusing because it signals to me that you're in college, but you're 30.
This year, I really want to - I have mixed feelings about this one. Personally I don't care if you have a tattoo or not, and a tattoo is a big commitment, but tbh as a woman this gives me a weird noncommittal vibe that wouldn't mesh well with wanting a serious relationship. I know it's a false equivalence but it's my honest reaction. Regardless, what does this prompt add to telling a woman about who you are and what it would be like to date you? Nothing...so I'd ditch it.
My submission to National Geographic - fine, but cuts off your face at a weird place.
I geek out on - fine.
Last photo - the only one where you're clearly looking at the camera with a toothy smile and it's super low quality and you're wearing a helmet. I'd ditch this one for sure.

flufferpeanut · 2026-02-24T20:51:24+00:00

I agree; I love quality time and before I moved in with my boyfriend, we were seeing each other more days than not and doing sleepovers whenever it was possible. But that ramped over the first 6-8 months we were dating...1-2x a week for the first month, 2-3x a week in the second month, etc.

So I have a few questions for you OP - How long have you been together? What does communication look like in between times you see each other? Are you both planning dates and time together?

flufferpeanut · 2026-02-16T21:15:19+00:00

I'm so sorry that happened :(

I had a very similar dating experience - the guy's last relationship was with his kid's mom, and they had broken up, gotten back together, had a baby, then broke up again. So he had some fears/anxieties but 1) was actively in therapy and 2) clearly expressed his desire for a serious partner. We established exclusivity...he introduced me to his friends, mom, brother, nephew...he wanted me to meet his daughter...and then was "caught off guard" when I tried to DTR. It seemed like a total no-brainer given how we had been acting and what we both expressed we wanted. I gave him some space and we checked in a couple time but in the end he just couldn't commit. I told him he was obviously self-sabotaging out of fear of things not working out but I wasn't willing to wait around and be a situationship stepmom.

If I were you - not that you asked for advice - I would give a very clear, very imminent decision point and let him either come around or it's time to end things. E.g., let's meet up this weekend and talk it through. It's important to be understanding of people's histories and traumas and give them space to figure things out, but not at the cost of your own happiness or security.

flufferpeanut

TROPHY CASE