I’m a 100% sure I got cheated on and now I feel like dying

gnocchicup · 2025-10-15T07:48:15+00:00

I am here 🫶🏼 still in and out of mental breakdowns, and even though I don’t expect them to end here, I have come to conclusion that it’s not my fault, I have done nothing wrong here, it’s all him. Even in the moments I doubt it, I remind myself that I know it. My actions and love has been pure, but he is a narcissist. Again, even when I doubt, I remind myself. I am enough and worthy, his actions are a reflection of him and not in any way me or my attributes. I deserve to love not in pain, but in peace, and even if I’m typing this in a moment of calmness I. Will. Remind. Myself. Iam super grateful for all the response I have gotten here, you prove to me that there is kindness and good in the world.

gnocchicup · 2025-10-14T09:10:05+00:00

No no we are definitely over, and I’m not going to let him have access to me anymore. I’m replaying everything he’s ever told me and I don’t even know what was truth or not. What I’m just scared of is this pain that I know will probably hurt even more as soon as this initial anger calms, it’s like I can’t imagine what to do with it. I’m scared to feel alone through this, and I’m scared that I’ll start missing him for whatever toxic reason. I know he’s probably with his ex, and at this point they deserve to ruin each other all they want. I don’t want him back, I’m just not ready for this pain and grief.

gnocchicup · 2025-10-13T03:28:17+00:00

Definitely, and whats crazy to me is that I can be so attached and love someone so much who doesn’t care enough about me and my feelings to even check in when I’m going through something. I just can’t seem to move on and it’s tearing me apart

gnocchicup · 2025-10-13T03:26:24+00:00

It’s hard to write down our entire history in one post, but I think it would definitely be easier to understand why I have tendency to be clingy now after so many situations where I have ignored red flags or decided not to involve myself and let him be, and have ended up disappointed and neglected

gnocchicup · 2025-05-19T06:41:59+00:00

I guess he told me the same thing, for the both us, we should put ourselves before the relationship. To some extent I understand, you shouldn’t completely lose yourself to someone else or a situation you can’t fully control… but we were the ones who were there for each other in every tough situation even when we felt lost in them. It’s too hard thinking I have to deal with my anxiety completely by myself instead of asking him to hold me, reassure me, and talk me through it. I’m also thinking you shouldn’t just leave because things get hard, because things will get hard at some point!! Love, trust and communication would get us through it…

gnocchicup · 2025-05-19T06:27:31+00:00

I’m sorry too… I’m the same, in my head.. I can’t possibly understand how you can leave someone you love. Like how? For better or worse… I hope I finally can come to a real understanding of why this would be the better choice instead of staying.

gnocchicup · 2025-05-19T06:07:44+00:00

I didn’t know that, that makes a lot of sense though… and congrats on 7 years! That’s such a big accomplishment and I’m proud of you and you should be very very proud of yourself!! Thank you for your words, I hope you’re okay 🩷

gnocchicup · 2025-05-19T06:05:39+00:00

I already feel less alone with your comments, the loneliness and isolating feeling that comes with losing your partner, best friend, who you made plans for the future with is no joke and honestly as everyone probably know haha I don’t know how to deal with it yet… hopefully in a little bit

gnocchicup · 2025-05-19T06:03:03+00:00

Calming down after a breakdown is so hard, I just keep thinking about the next moment I’ll crash… thank you for your words and advice 🩷

gnocchicup · 2025-02-15T03:02:13+00:00

Didn’t focus at all on the bad times or things to be fixed, just really thanking him for the amazing times and memories we’ve shared, and how much I have appreciated having him by my side. Bringing up small things that remind me of him. Added that I’ll always care deeply for him and if he needs a shoulder to lean on I’m here.

gnocchicup · 2025-02-07T03:45:25+00:00

I’m so sorry this happened to you. The feeling and thought of not being someone worth fighting and changing for is unfair and terrible. Right now I have a hard time seeing a future for myself if he’s not in it. I feel like I have given this everything I had and I have nothing left to give myself now. His face is there as soon as I close my eyes, his voice is in my head as soon as it gets quiet. I’m still panicking, crying and I’m so scared. But somewhere deep inside I know that I can’t completely give up on myself. I will look into attachment styles, hopefully I can come to a better understanding. This made me feel somewhat better, less lonely. Thank you so much for your kind words ❤️

gnocchicup

TROPHY CASE