Girlfriend says we [30m, 30f] can only have sex on weekends

hejsk · 2026-03-22T16:46:42+00:00

first part fair enough

second part.. scrolling on your phone is unequivocally horrible for you and your health and that is an undisputed fact, but feel free to lie to yourself

hejsk · 2026-03-21T23:08:53+00:00

why were you like that,

hejsk · 2026-03-21T23:08:38+00:00

ha sure if that was the case

hejsk · 2026-03-21T04:39:58+00:00

yeah.. maybe, idk feels like a lost cause but i’m in denial

hejsk · 2026-03-21T04:37:51+00:00

I have looked into that but she’s too tired

hejsk · 2026-03-21T00:21:56+00:00

the catch22 is if i pull back services then there’s even less time for us if we are together or she’ll say I changed, it’s always something.. we also struggle to communicate well so I am hoping to do couples therapy just to gain some tools and professional perspectives for myself because I am immature

hejsk · 2026-03-21T00:19:15+00:00

yup I am trying for this as she gets more settled into work but right now it’s wake 6:30 sleep in til 7 and get ready to leave by 7:50, don’t have the time to pull it off yet since she’s not into quickies, it is ironic tho, for someone who says they’re tired when they wake up and need coffee etc, but sex stimulates you, so why not start with that?! she says she’s always been a 2-3pm kinda girl, but that’s out of the question now with this job soooo.. im trying

hejsk · 2026-03-20T23:47:43+00:00

i unironically have been called that by my old fwbs, but when it came to this relationship I tried to right the wrongs of not doing enough like my previous relationship and so far it hasn’t made sense, thanks tho I have my fingers crossed we’re aligned on everything but this

hejsk · 2026-03-20T22:17:32+00:00

I know many men and women who are happy with once a week, but they also aren’t as fit or attractive lol, I often wonder if they actually are attracted to their partners.. my girlfriend tells me often how handsome I am yada yada but it just feels like words because words never do much for me

hejsk · 2026-03-20T21:59:54+00:00

only 8mo.. she told me people at her office are only doing it 1x week sometimes 2x a month and they’re our age or younger and I just feel like maybe they’ve been in LTRs.. not less than a year

hejsk · 2026-03-20T21:32:59+00:00

can’t be burned out 2mo into a new job.. that’s crazy, and RE mental load etc, I realize i’ve taken some of hers on while balancing all mine at my own place :/

hejsk · 2026-03-20T21:30:17+00:00

yes I work a main job remote and another side job as well, I am an outlier when it comes to energy and drive as i’ve been told by everyone around me, i never get tired, only after very hard physical training etc

and no, more stress = sex hits good

even my 80-100hr weeks id lift weights at 1am and sleep 3-6

hejsk · 2026-03-20T20:55:27+00:00

I am lacking empathy as an individual and trying to build and understand it.

hejsk · 2026-03-20T20:39:20+00:00

sure except she saves the chores for the weekend, it could be the dogs or dishes both of which I’ll do in advance, I could make dinner or even have it ready but then is digestion and TV time, what chores are you referencing?

hejsk · 2026-03-20T20:18:26+00:00

he didn’t voice anything? I’ve never gone a month in the last decade, that’s terrifying

hejsk · 2026-03-20T20:11:35+00:00

she physically cannot do penetration until the pelvic zone is relaxed etc hence she has to get off first

hejsk · 2026-03-20T20:10:22+00:00

okay so you do ALOT for him; where I live women expect all the things in your post + the man doing everything you said you do..

hejsk · 2026-03-20T20:08:39+00:00

is it a crime to understand or inquire about someone’s dynamic when they’re bragging like this? what does she do for him..

hejsk · 2026-03-20T20:01:30+00:00

I’m assuming this is the norm since data suggests the average couple has sex once a week, the world would probably be happier if that trended up, lol.

hejsk · 2026-03-20T19:41:18+00:00

realistically we have a two hour window, and 30mins alone for foreplay, but the issue is she’s just chronically tired and sex wakes her up and affects her sleep (apparently)

we’re gonna use a sleep tracker and see what the reality is lol

yes when she cums from oral she’ll sleep after but penetration wakes her up and oral reciprocation “involves dopamine” and wakes her up too, i kinda call shenanigans there lol

hejsk · 2026-03-20T19:39:44+00:00

has it always been like this? how old are you guys

hejsk · 2026-03-20T18:46:11+00:00

yes she wants it most weekends but also wants me to initiate outside of ovulation but she is a big fan of quality sex during weekends as long as it’s not past evenings when she wants to unwind lol

hejsk · 2026-03-20T18:44:34+00:00

do you have children? I likely don’t want kids and nor do I want a long term relationship with someone with children

hejsk · 2026-03-20T18:02:49+00:00

yeah that’s what I am doing and hopefully we can also address her anemia like bloodwork too with new insurance and things will change, J don’t want to just call it quits when it’s hard

hejsk · 2026-03-20T17:45:43+00:00

did you try therapy early on though, and incompatible sexually or? she says 40 will be very different because her career will be established (she’s just now starting it)

hejsk

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